Wayne Michael Reich

Writing ∙ Photography ∙ Art

Wayne Michael Reich
Browsing:

Month: September 2021

Leyba of Love PT 2. (Don’t Think the Walter)

“Only a blind man could have lived through these last years without seeing what was bearing down upon us; so I made myself blind as I could manage. I wanted to believe the worst was behind me, and I found an easy way to make it so. I simply turned my back on what was coming.” – John Wray

Greetings Bitchiteers!

I hope the day (or night) finds you well as you read this, even if you’re not a devotee of what I write, which I’m sure, could possibly happen from time to time. I guess. However, if you’re part of the small-town cabal that’s been sending ne threats ranging from fisticuffs in the local Walmart parking lot, to suggesting that one day, I will “take two” in the back of my, and I quote “empty f**king head”, then not only do I extend the metaphorical Welcome mat as it were to you all, I’ll also point out that if you’re consistently reading my stuff, you’re not as much a threat or a hater, as you are a fan.

Take a moment, and let that resonate inside you.

Regardless of why you’re here, I’m glad that you are, And if you’re one of the aforementioned emailing cravens, I wish that you find that personal character you obviously misplaced or traded for the chance to be misled by a Fanta-tinted twat. Either way, good luck with your quest.

When I last left you, I had just introduced you to a pair of soon-to-be metaphorically eviscerate conservative schmucks, who go by the names respectively, of Richard (“Ricardo”) Leyba, and Walter L, Cook Sr, and much personal merriment was had. At their expense, of course, because the Artbitch thoroughly enjoys a good roast- especially when the theoretical pigs that are about to be eaten, bring not only the grill, but the maple-wood briquets and secret dipping sauce as well.

All quips aside, I really need to get these people something nice to genuinely thank them for all the free mirth they’ve provided me as of late, and that right quick. Sure, those within the field of aberrant psychology might construe my flippant assessment of free entertainment as warning signs of possible mental illness where the persons I’ve previously written about are concerned, but to each his own.

Dumbf**ks are gonna dumbf**k, and all that, I guess. Now, if said disciple of dipsh***ery stayed only in their lane, I’d hardly pay any attention to them at all, past the occasional insertion of a snarky comment or two, as is my way. However, as this country sadly experienced on January 6th, not only do these puerile patriots not know what lane they’re supposed to be driving in, they’re doing Jell-O shots off the dashboard, as they careen down the sidewalk, yelling “MUH FREEDOMS!!!” for the entire length.

And doing so, backwards.

There once existed a certainty pre-internet, that the foremost cause for widespread willful ignorance, was a lack of access to factual and credible information. If anything, the availability of misinformation trafficked on the World Wide Web at any given moment, has not only driven a stake through the heart of that social myth, it installed a sunlamp inside its coffin as well, if only to make sure it remains dead.

In my day, I had three sources: the local library, the Encyclopedia Britannica, which was like Google, but without all the porn and cat videos, and my dad, who’s only saving grace was the fact that while he couldn’t tell us anything useful, he did have an excellent stash of Playboy magazine hidden out in the garage- I may not be able to tell you anything about the Depository Institutions Deregulation and Monetary Control Act of 1980, but rest assured, I can fill you in regarding every “turn-on” of Playboy’s 25th Anniversary Playmate, Candy Loving, without batting an eye.Which, if you’re curious, include, Walt Disney ice cream, listening to good music, and a warm bed on a cold, rainy night. To be honest, when it comes to the Disney thing, I’m not entirely sure if it’s the movies, the parks, or the man himself she digs, but as the slightly embarrassed owner of about 500 Milla Jovovich screensavers, I really have no room to judge anything here.

Whereas Leyba and Walter are concerned however, not only is it pretty much open season regarding the absurd idiocy that they both post as if they own stock in a meme factory, the level of intellectual firepower needed to disprove it is literally so negligible, that a basic response doing so, is akin to shooting a dolphin wedged in a barrel, from inside the barrel…

With an ICBM.

Whether the topic at hand involves the debating of politics, health, or social issues such as civil rights, racism, wealth inequality, or the modern-day conservative’s faux-rage hot-button concern and favorite scapegoat, that being immigration, both legal and otherwise, it’s almost a certainty that if any type of data is presented as “proof’, it’ll be most indubitably cherry-picked, manipulated, or concocted outright. It the Alt-right ever loses the ability to lie or meme, Twitter would become the heir apparent to OnlyFans.

Sorry PornHub, but you know I’m not wrong. After all, being wrong about, well… almost everything under the Sun is really where America’s Klan [correct spelling] of conservatives really shine, even if the glow is from a tiki-torch. And yes, I’m sticking with that, considering that when looked at it from a statistical overview, White supremacists and others of the same ilk overwhelmingly vote… wait for it- Republican.

Just a heads up, guys- you may not think your party is a haven for wannabe members of the National Socialist German Workers’ Party, but they sure as hell believe it is. You might want to do something about that, after you get done ignoring the reality of it. Now, this is not to say that Leyba and his emotional boyfriend Wally share the same ideology as the affiliated members of what would later mutate into the bad guys from the Indiana jones movie, but they do have a few commonalities to note, some of which I will gleefully dissect as our narrative moves along.

I closed off the first entry chronicling the laughably abominable ignorance of these meme posting morons with a splash of Leyba’s thinly veiled misogyny, disguised as concern that young boys were being malevolently emasculated by of all things, female public school teachers, so I suggest we pick up that baton pf bastard0m and run it a tad bit further down the track. And nto get us out of the starting blocks, we’ll open with this gem of inverted small-dick energy:That’s right, Ladies- ol’ Ricky is here to set you all straight as to what a “real” man likes and rightfully expects out of “their’ woman, and you don’t even have to thank him for doing so. Just shut your mouth, wear what he tells you to wear, and don’t you dare let any thoughts go through that pretty little head of yours, because if there’s any thinking to be done around here, he’ll be the one doing it. You’re welcome. Oh, and don’t forget to praise God too, because for some reason now , he’s involved in wardrobe decisions as well.

However, Wally, our resident ,guru of insincerity, comes off the bench with a meme (naturally) that goes one better than Leyba’s, because his manages to be political, misogynistic, and hypocritical all at the same time, and for a guy of his advanced age and limited intellect, that’s quite the impressive display of ignorant stamina, let me tell you:What Walter is referencing here, other than his sagacity for total disingenuousness, is the fact that TV talk show host Montel Williams and now US VP kamala Harris briefly dated close to TWO DECAD$ES AGO while they were both SINGLE. For the record, in 2001, Williams was recently divorced from his first wife, and it would be 13 more years before Harris would tie the knot with her husband, Doug Emhoff. So, the implication that something illicit (like an affair) was going on, is literally constructed out of Walter’s pathetically uninspired stroking fodder, and his inability to adequately research the factual

Funny thing though? I have yet to see Wally post anything about Trump’s multiple affairs, his raw-dogging a porn star, or the fact that he displays more lecherousness than a Catholic priest at a Boy Scout jamboree, but I’m sure he’ll get right on that, after he gets done feeling indignant that a woman of color dared to have a life without his approval. And as to the memes’ comment of “You can’t make this stuff up”, I’m not sure why two consenting adults dating is even a concern for Wally, unless he’s jealous of the fact that every time he wants to get laid, his GF requires either batteries, or more likely, inflation.

And when it comes to giving due respect to our first female VP of African-Indian descent, rest assured, that Leyba is also keen o putting his best foot forward,,, well, into his mouth anyway, as he attempts, and fails, to hurl two asinine stones at once:.
Let it never be said that Leyba isn’t a class act all the way. In fact, I’m pretty sure that he is, given the rumors that when he’s done allegedly paying for sex, he’ll always hold open the car door for whomever he rented that five minutes from, to let them out. True gentleman, and all that. For all intents and purposes, that’s obviously a joke, because I’m also fairly certain that A: he doesn’t have that much spare cash just lying around, and B: the act of engaging in such things, might lead to a relationship rift between him and his Fleshlight.

I’ll address the “China Joe’ slur in a moment, but let me first offer a discourse on the vulgar commentary below it. To note; the definition of “camel toe’ when specifically applied to women versus a dromedary animal, is thus: “Camel toe” is a slang term that refers to the outline of labia, as seen through tightly fitting clothes. In men, the equivalent to “camel toe” is referred to as a “moose knuckle”.” Considering Leyba’s alleged homophobia that I dissected within the screed preceding this one, I’m going to opine that while Leyba’s chin has never had a set of labia rest upon it, his “open to moose knuckles” sign has been hanging off it for quite some time.

As to the “China Joe” symbolization, the knowledge that it was coined by a man who tried for more than a decade to register trademarks in China, ranging from providing “construction-information,” to real estate  services, as both he and daughter outsourced manufacturing jobs to the country, should have raised some eyebrows among even the most die-hard of conservatives, especially given Trump‘s openly hypocritical anti-China presidential posturing, but it hasn’t, and certifiably, never will.

There’s also the matter of his maintaining bank accounts there as well, but they are excluded from his public financial disclosures, [where individual assets must be itemized], because they are held under corporate names. Chines tax records show that between the period of 2013-15, Trump paid $188,561 in taxes, yet allegedly then went on to collect [as estimated by Forbes] $5.4 million from a lease agreement involving a state-owned bank residing within the Trump Tower, located in New York City.

But please my internet scholar,, lecture us Liberals about Joe Biden’s “corruption, as you deliberately overlook the Sweet and Sour Pork swamp that he and his equally as corrupt daughter reside in. And if I might add these signs started appearing before Biden had even taken office, showing that once again, Conservatives for all of their mewling about being forward-thinking, have truly no inner outlook on what’s to come, no unbiased recollection of the past, and most certainly, no awareness of the present as well.

Case in point? Well, here’s yet another sampling of Leyba’s cuck-cake, in which he informs us all, as to what “real” masculinity is, and once again, it just goes to show exactly why in the not-too-distant future, there’ll’ be an entire cottage industry within the psychiatric community making bank off his much needed, but hopefully not court-ordered, therapy. And while Walter is curiously silent on the subject of masculinity, you have my word that he’ll make up for it when he reemerges..The first thing that came to mind when I read this, was that somewhere, perhaps out in the parking lot behind the factory where they make AXE body-spray, Ted Nugent just called Bill O’ Reilly to excitedly declare that they had finally found the One True Douchebag, as foretold in the prophecies issued as actual readers’ letters by Bob Guccione, the late prophet of Penthouse’s Forum section.
Drink in the awesomeness boys and girls, that was Bob- because this is what a true feminist looks like.

Now to be honest, I have no idea what kind of father figure raised Leyba, but judging from this recycled 1950’s era sexist tripe, I can only assume he drank his Scotch neat, smoked unfiltered cigarettes, and died a broken man after his fed-up wife left him for another woman. Once again, I’m just poking fun, but holy crap… if this diatribe involved any more chest-beating, Leyba’s spleen would be forced by his now-shattered sternum, to take up residence on the backside of his lungs.

As for his closing advice of; “So… grow your beard, wear your boots, eat your steak, carry a knife, own a gun, [in case you can’t find your knife?] protect your woman, fight for what is right and just, Be strong” I can only point out that despite not offering up any counsel advising young men that they should have not only respect for women and their body autonomy, they should also gracefully accept that women also aren’t a possessive object to be owned of displayed, either,

I’m sure he was going to get right on those topics, but not until he reminded his domestic trophy, that he runs the house, and she just needs to keep it clean for when his friends come over. Newsflash Ricky- no one has ever told you or anyone else for that matter, what you can and can’t do as an adult male, and if this sort of thing does happen to you a lot, maybe it’s not because they don’t understand what masculinity accurately entails, maybe it’s you who doesn’t.

But like most lowly curs that find a bone and run with it, Leyba just can’t let go of his obsession that not acting like a 14-year-old brotard well past the age when you should, is a bad thing, and feebly swipes at modern society with this meme, combining vulgarity, his mewling fear, and perhaps even far worse in this, the age of auto-correct… incorrect spelling:
Wow. Just… wow. I won’t speak for anyone save myself here, but if your idea of “manly” is to be the living embodiment of a men’s room floor inside the NYC subway terminal, you sir, have smashed it the f**k out of the proverbial park.

I’m so impressed in fact, that I’ll even overlook yet another misogynistic slur of yours that directly infers that women are somehow inferior to men yet again, due to nothing more than a quirk of biology. I as usual, can only speak for myself, but if I were to be brutally honest, I’d have to suggest that being born with genitalia that can be racked into either nausea or unconsciousness just by hitting the toilet seat wrong, isn’t really much of an asset, when all is said and done.

Just for fun, here’s a few interesting facts about vaginas, and if you’d like, feel free to take notes, so you don’t publicly embarrass yourself like Ricky tends to do. First and foremost, close to half pf the planet’s denizens have one, and almost all of them have no interest in what Ricky erroneously believes. Also, the clitoris has twice as many nerve endings as a penis, which means it can be as sensitive as Ricky is when reality doesn’t agree with him. Even though, you’d think he’d be used to that by now, given how frequently it occurs.

And unlike a man’s spawn hammer, vaginas manage to push out a fully formed human being, and most do so worldwide without the benefit of anesthesia, but please little Ricky, tell us all again about how women are the weaker ones. And if you still think that they are, remember your childhood- nobody would ever admit to being scared of your dad, but they were openly terrified sh**less when it came to your mom.

I earlier stated my humorous conviction that while Ricky’s chin has “never had a set of labia rest upon it, his “open to moose knuckles” sign has been hanging off it for quite some time”, and I still stand by this, even if it’s only at best, a cheap joke. However, I would now like to amend that observation somewhat, as I’m also going to suggest that not only has one never occupied his chin, the only ones he has ever seen, were due to the courtesy of, and his access to, the World Wide Web.

Which, when given serious contemplation, makes his incorrect spelling for multiple vaginas quite odd, because the web correctly identifies such a grouping as “pussies”, and not the moniker for multiple cats. Maybe that’s why he seems so confused as where to stick both his nose and his diminutive wang. That’s just an educated guess on my part,, as I quite honestly, really don’t want to know the actual answer.

Nevertheless, if you want to be a card-carrying member of the Misogynist Moron Club, then the next natural step is to demand the right to dictate what women who are unknown to you, do with their own bodies, because as a male who lacks both a uterus and the responsibility that comes with it, you, of course, obviously know far better than they do, as to what’s truly best for them and the spawn you don’t want to pay for, and more pertinently, will not raise to adulthood.

And now, as Ricky takes a well-earned break from humiliating himself, may I reintroduce our good friend Walter L Cook Sr, who’s come straight from the chaise lounge where he’s been dreaming about dictating total strangers’ reproductive choices, as yet another of his unique takes on what he so wrongly considers to be correct and beneficial commentary, is offered up for your enjoyment:
For the record, Planned Parenthood does not: kill people”, because a fetus is not a person, until it can actually survive outside the womb, which it cannot do, hence the reason why such procedures are performed during an exceedingly brief window of time. It must be very comforting to be able to sanctimoniously demand that others forgo a decision that you yourself, will never be forced to make.

I find it interesting however, that while doctors in a hospital can declare someone legally dead if they have no brain activity, yet still have a heartbeat, and can generally do so without too much fear of authoritative public reproach, however, the reverse is true when it comes to the act of sanctioned abortion. To clarify my previous point, abortions are undertaken when the as yet undeveloped fetus has no definable brain activity whatsoever.

What this means in the simplest pf laymen terms, is that there is no cognitive awareness contained within the fetus to speak of. Zero. Zilch. NADA. It is, by all estimations, both medical and morality wise, brain-dead. But just ignore all that, so you can rationalize your wanting to cosplay The Handmaiden’s Tale for real. Or better yet, just move to Texas, and pretend that your interest in stopping access to legal abortions, has less to do with controlling the women who’s use of their autonomy infuriates you, and instead, cast yourself in the heroic role of honoring the proclamations of an invented deity who’s very own manual of instructions, says nothing about the act itself. .

in fact, the word “abortion” does not appear at any point within the Bible, regardless of what translation it may be. Interestingly, when the over 600 Mosaic laws are reviewed, not a single whatsoever, remarks about the act itself. Exodus 21:22-25 does mention miscarriage as a crime, but only if If a woman involved has one as the result of a fight- if so, the man who caused it should be fined. If the woman dies however, the perpetrator must themselves, be put to death:

“If men strive, and hurt a woman with child, so that her fruit depart from her, and yet no mischief follow: he shall be surely punished according as the woman’s husband will lay upon him; and he shall pay as the judges determine. And if any mischief follow, then thou shalt give life for life, Eye for eye, tooth for tooth ”

The Bible does not dictate consequences for the loss of a fetus, but does order the death penalty for the murder of a human being. And don’t worry, I can discuss how enacting the death penalty literally violates God’s own Commandant No. 5 at a later date.

In addendum, the procedure is also not part of a Deep State plot to murder a future generation either, as abortion procedures [estimated] constitute less than three percent, with the majority of provided services encompassing the following: STD / HIV testing and treatment, birth control, reproductive cancer screening, including prostate cancer, pap tests and well woman exams, vaccines, providing PrEP and PEP (medications, prenatal care, Transgender health services, including HRT, vasectomies, and counseling services, along with sex education.

And no… abortions are not underwritten by the federal government, and haven’t been since 1974, due to the Hyde Amendment, which just so happens to be a jurisdictive provision excluding the use of federal funds to pay for abortion except to save the life of the woman, or if the pregnancy arises from incest or rape. So, feel free to zip your lips before you start dragging that threadbare inanity out of your uneducated mouth. But Wally, he of the non-uterus enhanced gender, still has more to say about the subject, even if he wraps it in a rant topped with delusional sauce:Damn. Coalescing Islamophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, jingoism, and displaying his stunning betrayal of the so-called Christian beliefs he claimed previously to hold so dear, as he obsesses over uteruses that he has no connection to? This is some truly grand dedication to the craft of being a self-righteous jackass, and I mean that most sincerely. I mean, this Trunt can’t defend a single one of his repulsive points of view, but he can mix the vilest elements of Humanity’s weaknesses together, as if he were Tom Cruise starring in 1988’s “Cocktail”.

And if you’re still unsure as to whether or not Wally here is the champion of morality that he claims to be, keep in mind that not only does he STILL support Trump, just like most virtuous Christians would do, he also doesn’t seem too awfully concerned about the life the babies he wants born will have, long after they are. And if his anti-immigrant comments are a tell, I’m pretty sure there’s a shading index when it comes to exactly which babies he wants to save in the end.

Of course, that’s just my opinion. Feel free to form your own, using the data I’ve previously provided, and we’ll compare our personal takes somewhere down the road. Speaking if data, you would think that a person who obsesses over the unborn that he’ll never know, and most certainly won’t assist, would also go that one step further, and undertake a deep dive as it were, to know inside and out, the full scope of the topic that he browbeats others with, as if he were a part-time dominatrix doorman in a Marquis de Sade themed hotel.

But then again, we should all take a moment to remember just who we’re talking about, and what he considers to be personal role models, such as this tinted pig testicle, seen here, mocking a physically disabled journalist;
So, yes… we should totally trust the critical research skills of a man who claims to value life, unless of course, his favorite mango man-crush deems it ripe for public humiliation. And as an amusing aside, I’d like to remind our resident uterine usher of the time that Trump told Howard Stern that when it came to the topic of abortion; “It’s never been my big issue. Somebody asks me, and I say pro-life, but it’s never been an issue that really has been discussed with me in great detail.”  Other than the time he joked [to Stern\about wanting his first mistress (and later, second wife) Marla, to abort their daughter Tiffany, pf course.

And just because I don’t want to make Walter feel like a hypocrite for his earlier rant where he talked about homeless vets and a ”cry for compassion”, I won’t even mention how little of such Trump has shown towards both the homeless and veteran demographic. Nonetheless, and for the moment, let’s forget all that, so that we may hear yet another under-educated from Walter regarding an excruciatingly personal decision he’ll never have the right to make for others:

Sigh… can anybody reading this please tell me, just how one can be this goddamn stupid, and yet, still use the internet to consistently download ignorantly incorrect memes? Oh, wait… I think I just answered my own question there, so never mind. While this narrative of rampant and un-prosecuted infanticide is a popular point of dissertation within the pro-life community, it is also blatantly, transparently, and abominably, false.  

Late term abortions, which take place at or after 21 weeks, are not only unusual, they represent 1% of all abortions performed within the US. This completely legal medical procedure is performed only in cases when health concerns such as fetal birth defects, or endangerment of the mother’s life, happen to present themselves as medically actionable. Walter can scream to the sky all that he wants, but there will never be a day where he and the rest of his facetious Fallopian f**kheads get what they want, It’s lawful Wally, and will remain so, as it’s none of your business to begin with.

And once again, thanks for showing us all yet again, that when it comes to lowering one’s intellectual bar, you’re willing to dig all the way to China to do so. Far be it from me to mock your readiness to so openly display your unsubstantiated male privilege in public, but I do admire your unwavering dedication to it. If anything, it may be the only good quality you can call attention to.

Another demographic that conservatives have been gleefully maligning as ethically challenged grafters and cheats since the Reagan era, is the working poor, and the financially indigent, portrayed much in the same way that they classify immigrants as the true enemies of “Western Civilization”, a catch-phrase most associated with the modern-day White supremacy movement. In short, if you’re brownish or poor, you’re the real cause behind America’s financial and cultural decline, because unlike the non-tax-paying 1%, personified by Jeff Bezos and others of his corporate ilk, you add nothing to the country that’s been far too charitable, if not far too gullible, to provide you the safest of undeserved harbors for years.

And you can bet the sweetest of your bippies, that both he and Leyba, will have memse for this opinion:
Oh, look everyone! Candyass Owens has arrived, and as is typical, our resident Steph-anie Fetchit for conservative compensation, has a racist observation cloaked as an oblivious judgement. Other than the fact that this meme is the Alt-right’s pictorial equivalent of “I can’t be racist, I have a Black friend”, it’s also a tad bit puzzling, as well. What pray tell, does the topic of slavery, the legacy of which Candy here, owes her place in this country to, have to do with the working poor and impoverished?  

NOTHING, that’s what. Christ, if i didn’t know any better, I’d have to assume her side-hustle was serving as the Deflector Shield on the USS Enterprise. We get it, Candy O- you’re perfectly okay with selling out your race, your ethics, and most disturbingly, your gender, to the highest bidder as if they were on the block at Point Comfort, but JFC… what the f**k did a poor person ever do to you personally? Remind you that your only value to the Establishment you pimp for, is as a token accessory?

Key word here of course, being “token”.

I also have to question the authenticity of her coming across “only lazy people”, as the bizzarro world she lives in, is overstocked with sycophants such as herself, who only live to perform an act of metaphorical fellatio or cunnilingus upon those that they believe can benefit them down the road- hence the reason why this self-made puerile pundit could in theory, easily tie a Constrictor Knot without using her hands to do so.

The only “Human Parasite” I see here, you morally rudderless Aunt Jemima, is the one that claims Racism doesn’t exist, yet sued her former college for “racial harassment”, and then later, attempted to sue Facebook over fact-checking her labeled as false posts regarding Coronavirus. Claiming that Facebook’s actions financially harmed her by deriving her of advertising revenue that she gleans from her Facebook page, she also sued for intentional interference with contractual relations, tortious interference with prospective business relations, and unfair competition, along with two separate claims accusing defamation.

Clarifying his dismissal of the case, based on the Courts’ finding that Owens had failed to state an actionable claim against the targeted defendants, Superior Court Judge Craig Karsnitz stated that; “The political aspects of this case are manifest but must be ignored in favor of application of the law,” Minus the legalese, this may be the nicest way to say; screech all you want, my representative of conservative Candida, but the only way they’ll ever let you into their club, is if you agree to come in through the kitchen’s backdoor, pr more accurately where you’re concerned, the servant’s entrance.

Here, we see Wally attempt a different approach to mocking the working poor, by sadly pretending that he understands exactly how unemployment benefits, and our capitalistic gig-driven economy, work:
Seriously… if anyone reading this happens to personally knows this Kindergartner masquerading as an adult, it might be time to deny him access to the house scissors, and replace them with Hello Kitty ones, instead. Let me see if I can explain what’s currently going on to you Walter, without using flash cards, cartoons, or hand puppets. To note, close to half [43%] of all jobs in this country, pay somewhat  less than the average unemployment check issued in its place.

Now, to a fully-functioning human, the fist thought that this knowledge should inspire is; “Holy crap, that’s barely a living wage, considering that in this country currently, there’s no state where you can rent a one-bedroom apartment, while working for minimum-wage.” Why is that you, but not Walter, ask? It’s all centered on the fact that while CEO compensation has grown 940% since 1978, the average worker has only seen an uptick of 12%, the last of such raises being sanctioned in July, of 2009.

In a move that’s ever so convenient for his narrative, Walter has chosen to ignore that across the board, wages have not kept up with inflation, and they certainly haven’t kept pace with the rising costs of living, either. Rent is up. Food costs are up. Gas is up. Utilities are up. Incidental expenses are up. Healthcare costs are up. And no, it isn’t a specific political party’s fault, although we all do know which one has specific ideologists who don’t give a damn if somebody can or cannot, afford to pay for the elements of basic survival.

As an example, I have yet to see a democrat rail against a living wage and affordable healthcare, but I digress for the moment. Indeed, the troglodytes will just suggest you either get “a better job” from an employer who still won’t pay you what you’re worth, or that you should acquire an additional “side-hustle”, to make ends meet, because as it turns out, the root cause of all your financial strife isn’t the fault of our one-sided system of capitalism, it’s that you, the poor unskilled worker drone, spends too much money on coffee from Starbucks. Ditch the latte, become a financial hot-tay, as the cool rich kids like to say.

What Walter and the assumed voices in his head that feed him his asinine thoughts fail to recognize, is this: anybody who works 40 hours a week, should be able to easily pay their bills, and that’s it. Rather than impugn the working poor, maybe you should ask their employers who pay far less in taxes, as to why they treat their workforce like disposable chattel, for a start. Looking squarely at you Jeff Bezos, America’s premier Lex Luthor cosplayer.
However, Wally did ask for an answer, so I’ll give him one. I know this may come as a shock to you, Walter, but when you live paycheck to paycheck, it’s damn near nigh impossible to prepare for a situation, such as a global pandemic, which, thanks to anti-mask/vaccine dumbf**ks like yourself, keep spreading the virus as if they were handing out samples at Costco, mainly because they refuse to follow common sense health protocols

Why can’t “they” pay their rent, you asked? Maybe it has something to do with the fact that landlords, utility companies, internet and telecommunication providers refused to freeze payments during this time of international strife, leading to whatever meager savings these people had being drained, just so they could survive. How dare they not think of your feelings regarding the matter. Bastards, every single one of “them”. Not like you of course… you’re just swell.

Sadly, Walter isn’t alone in his failure to grasp the fallout in relation to modern-day Capitalism, as his fellow ideological imbecile Ricky proves, by presenting as his way, yet another meme in place of a fact-based argument:
Before I address this self-righteous arrogance from a man who seemingly spends all of his free time searching out pictures on the internet because thinking for yourself is apparently hard, I’d like to call attention that among the small group of faux patriots Ricky protests reality with. These people trade memes as if they were baseball cards or the girlfriends of Hugh Hefner. If I had to classify this discord sowing circle, I’d opine that they’re the closest thing I’ve ever seen to an online circle jerk, at best.

It would be hypocritical of me to deride the act of mental masturbation, but JFC, I’d at least pick better partners if I were to engage in such an activity, and I most definitely, wouldn’t brag about it so openly. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge fan of finding your center, but being an ignorant jackass in an attempt to secure it, is undeniably not the way to achieve it. So, “this new generation does not like working”, Ricky?

Gee, I wonder why that is, Rickarino… maybe the root cause is that the new generation as you so blithely dismiss it, isn’t willing as we all were to be exploited to death, perhaps? Or would it be that they, unlike us, figured out that the concept of “Work/Life balance” is a f**ked-up punchline in regards to personal fulfillment? I’d also suggest that maybe they’re sick and tired of not being able to afford the life derived from all of their hard work, but that’s just off the top of my head.

Nah, “they” once again, must just be lazy. After all, just because they as a whole, can’t afford to buy a home, pursue higher education, or see a doctor when necessary without the worry of financial loss or total ruin, shouldn’t alter your opinion at all. And before you decry that the new generation is somehow less than yours, I’d suggest that you also take a moment to remember that collectively, yours and mine, are the generations that left them this economic sewer to begin with. You can’t complain about the playing field, if you’re the vandal that ripped up all the grass.

Comprender, cabrón? Oh, who am I kidding… it’s like having a battle of wits with a plate of deep-fried Churros, except for the fact that unlike Ricky, most people actually look forward to seeing them in their house. Speaking of things that are largely comprised of lard, although in this case, I’m referencing to his intellect, Walter returns with this gem, where he seamlessly merges his paranoia, social racism, and his obvious distaste for helping the less fortunate into an opinion that could have only come out of the failure of his parents to spawn a human with a working soul:Hmm… has anyone else noticed that when Trumpians show up en masse on a weekday no less, to protest everything from non-existent voter fraud to non-existent forced vaccinations, they classify themselves as “patriots” and not lavabouts shirking their employment responsibilities?  I’m sure there’s no hypocrisy there to dissect, am I right? And the inference that people who protest for the cause of Civil Rights are always on Welfare? A classic slur, straight out of the pages of the disingenuousness playbook that conservatives reference more than they ever do the Bible.

You remember the Bible don’t you, Walter? It’s chock-full of edicts regarding the poor, such as Proverbs 22:9, which says: “Whoever has a bountiful eye will be blessed, for he shares his bread with the poor.” Now if that’s not your speed, you could always go with Proverbs 14:32, “Whoever oppresses a poor man insults his Maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors him.” Personally, I’ve always liked the simplicity of Deuteronomy 15:11 which declares that; “For there will never cease to be poor in the land. Therefore, I command you, ‘You shall open wide your hand to your brother, to the needy and to the poor, in your land.’

But hey… it’s not like you have to explicitly follow the commands of the God you claim to worship, pr suffer consequences for not doing so, I’m sure. After all, he seems like a really chill guy, the above rules above notwithstanding, and I’m almost certain that at this point, he’s probably fed up with being the charitable one all the time. In fact, I’m thinking the perfect crystallization of who you are and what you stand for, is best encapsulated by Proverbs 29:7; “A righteous man knows the rights of the poor; a wicked man does not understand such knowledge.”

And as time goes on, it’s fairly clear to us all, that not only do you fail to understand or even care, just why people protest injustice, you’re apparently cool with it running unchecked over the most vulnerable of our society. Jesus must be so proud. That’s probably the reason why he tells everyone he has no idea who you are. But when it comes to Me on the other hand? Not only does he know my name and my favorite color, I have his personal cell number too, as he’d rather spend his free time hanging out with kind  and logical atheists, rather than faux Christians who ironically, are also truly hateful. Weird, that.

Differing ideologies aside, even I will admit, lf begrudgingly that is, that there is some limited distinction to having a good work ethic, although I wouldn’t be so crass as to sully it with an abominable neglect for the reality of the struggles that many Americans are currently going through.  The Beatles once sang that ”It’s Been a Hard Day’s Night”, but an addendum that these two obviously believe in, is that  a hard day’s work, ls not as valuable say, than not appearing as if you built your previous assertions regarding the merits of work on a base of hypocritical sand:

At this moment, you might think Ricky’s calling for a day off from work to go protest a sadly necessary mask mandate might present itself as a moral quandary for someone whose words and actions were lauded as consistently straightforward, but let’s all remember which lifetime member of the Janus fan club we’re currently dealing with here, shall we?

 In a nutshell, this “new generation” doesn’t want to work, but it’s perfectly acceptable for Ricky here, to not only call out of work without fear of credible consequence, I might add, but the impetus behind such, is so that he can go participate in an orgy of whiny bitchiness with his fellow Karens and Kevins. Make no mistake though, Leyba knows exactly who he really is, despite the evidence available to both he and us, and in order to prove it, has decided to employ a borrowed meme that was written by another person, to declare his unique individuality from the balcony of his pre-manufactured ivory trailer:I’m starting to think that when it comes to displaying a genuine personality, Leyba’s ability to do so, is as strong as the one that Gary Busey’s ‘s teeth have to remain inside his lips. All sarcasm aside, this jackass wraps himself in so many labels, you’d think he was having a torrid love affair with a Dymo LabelManager 420P. There are several reasons why you’re not considered politically correct, Ricky, and it has less to do with the rationalizations that you lifted from a complete stranger, and far more with the fact that when it comes to a grasp on the issues of the day, your intellectual grip is akin to that of a Teflon coated duck running on ice… downhill.

As we’ve come to see, if not expect, from the majority of Leyba’s on loan opinions, not having the ability to articulate his impotent confusion at how the world actually works, has bit him once more in that future intellectual illiteracy poster image he calls a face, and I for one, could not be happier about it. The only way that mocking those like Leyba and Walter could get any easier, is if a team of snarky Elves crept into my bedroom at night as I slept, and wrote these pieces for me. But since they seem to be too busy these days baking cookies in a tree, that is, when they’re not trying to assassinate Snap, Crackle, and Pop- I guess I’ll just have to continue doing it myself.

To note; 1: You can’t be “born again”. You can however, pervert a religion to justify you’re being a sh***y human being though, which sadly, does seem to be working out for you. 2: I can only assume you’re referring to one made in China, where your mango Mussolini still maintains secret bank accounts, and also where his unrealized sex fantasy/daughter located her sweatshops?

3: And yet, you and your ilk can never explain just why. Maybe someday. 4: Of course, you do. After all, it’s not like your dick is gonna get any bigger, and traditionally, ammo is way cheaper than the lengthening surgery you so desire. 5: Very much in the same way you’re for worker exploitation, crippling personal debt, and blocking others from earning a living wage.

What a brave stand you’ve taken, Gunga Dim.

6: Border security, AKA racist xenophobia. Either/or. Whatever lights your tiki torch. 7: No, you’re a willfully ignorant spit-for-brains, but since you are, I can understand your misunderstanding of the descriptive. 8: Man, not being elected Prom Queen has really messed you up, hasn’t it? Dude, it’s 2021- nobody cares if you’re still in the closet. Even if you are allegedly sitting on next year’s Christmas gifts. 9: Again, I admire your brave stand, considering that it’s a decision that you’ll never have be forced to make, and live in a society that never penalizes the cowardly men who seeded and ran.

And finally, we reach number 10, where Ricky lets us all know that while he does respect “the” Constitution, he can’t be bothered to extend that esteem to the practice of good grammar. Not only have you never read the Constitution Ricky, save for the 2nd Amendment, I seriously doubt that you’ve ever owned a copy that didn’t come as a pop-up version, or with a cartoon bald eagle on the cover. That is, if you’ve ever been in possession of one at any point in your life.

It stands to reason, that if you get all your opinions from memes downloaded off the Web, the odds are also pretty good that the depth of your personal library consists of nothing more than a take-out menu from Blake’s, and a dog-eared copy of The Art of The Deal, written by a ghostwriter who’s made more money from the book than the so-called “deal maker” described within its too-far-apart-covers did. But maybe, I’m being a tad bit judgmental regarding Leyba’s limited literary understanding, because the Constitution does tend to use a lot of five-dollar words, and to be fair, some may be a buck or two out of his humanistic reach.

That is not to say however, that there isn’t a lot of words in there he can’t understand, it’s more accurate to say they’re words he strongly dislikes the meanings of, such as “personal responsibility”,, for instance. Ironically though, he did undertake dome unforeseen initiative and compiled a list of several other words relating to such, that he vehemently opposes, due to the fact that they dare to remind that the world doesn’t revolve solely around him:If I were forced to say something complimentary about this walking pile of egocentric and faux eruditeness, the best that I could mutter would be that he’ll never go hungry, because he’s already so goddamn full of himself, that there’s no room left for a bite that nourishes, much less a brain that works Scratch that assessment, I should have really left a niche for his soul in there as well, but it’s doubtful that a berth for it could exist given the cramped quarters, and it’s not like he’s ever had a function9ng one to begin with, so I guess it’s all good in the end..

As with most things conservatives purport a belief in, they didn’t come up with it of their own accord,, they gleaned it seamlessly from somebody else who’s idiocy they admire. In this case, Candyass Owens is back, and she’s obviously Leyba’s t inspiration to emulate flawlessly, the driving sentiment popular among these self-declared patriotic Americans, that being a sense of unbridled selfish narcissism:

What. A. Badass. Bitch. Am I right, kids? Not about her being a badass, mind you, the part about her being a bitch, I mean.What. A. Badass. Bitch. Am I right, kids?

Not about her being a badass, mind you, the part about her being a bitch, I mean. It’s bad enough that as a self-declared patriotic American, that she views a unified front as the lowest of “communistic propaganda”, but recently, a private facility in Colorado refused to test her for COVID, citing in an email sent by the facilities owner, that;

“I’ve just learned of this testing request and as the owner of this business am going to refuse this booking and deny service. We cannot support anyone who has pro-actively worked to make this pandemic worse by spreading misinformation, politicizing and DISCOURAGING the wearing of masks and actively dissuading people from receiving life-saving vaccinations.” “My team and myself have worked overtime, to exhaustion, unpaid and underpaid this past year, spending our own capital to ensure that our community remains protected,” “It would be unfair to them and to the sacrifices we have all made this year to serve you” …

Most of us, because we’re actually people, might wonder if she gave even the slightest of pause to the random fleeting thought that maybe, just maybe, calling the COVID-19 vaccine “purely evil” and railing against mask-wearing mandates, might have been in retrospect, a bad idea overall. And knowing that the ostensible email also included the consideration that she should instead, visit “the only other local testing option,” which, has “inconsistent result times”, and I for one, would hope it would have burned, as if she were riding atop a flaming Sybian machine.

But once again, let’s all take a second to recall what a disingenuous conservative carnival barker she is, and go on from there, shall we? An alleged race-trader who claims that Racism isn’t real, while suing her former college for racism. Up to speed? Great. Let’s sally forward.

Does it strike anyone else as strange that somebody who derides the evidence underpinning vaccines and mask mandates to stave off COVID, would also simultaneously trust the science that determines those infected with it? While the answer to my inquiry is perceptibly “yes”, the timing of her interest is quite odd as well. Prior to her attempt, she was scheduled to be a key speaker at the Texas Youth Summit. Because the future Brownshirts of America tend to be made, not born, buy canceled due to what an event organizer termed a “sudden illness”, which I’m sure was nothing more than a wacky coinkydink.

Taking to her favorite perch of victimhood, aka the World Wide Web, Owens responded to the valid snub by saying: “I wanted to let you know that this might objectively be the most hilarious e-mail I have ever received in my life. Truly, I’ve never laughed harder,” A claim that I find somewhat personally dubious, as I’d assume she watches the SAW movies strictly for the jokes.

Sustaining her assertion that she did not have COVID, and that any supposition that she did quantified as an unsupported (irony abounds here) “conspiracy theory”, and she would know, being the reigning princess of them, she added; “Nothing screams ‘this virus isn’t political’ quite like googling the names of the people who book tests with you and determining on a case-by-case basis whether or not you will let them comply with your community covid measures. Nothing screams ‘I love my local community’ quite like refusing to test people who are going to a local event and wish to ensure they are negative and therefore do not spread the virus.”

She then disparaged the business owner’s email as “emotional unstable and hysterical” , as she deflected from facing the points raised within, ending her hypocritically oblivious limp-wristed-swipe with a cheery, “LOL.”, which just goes to show you, that just because she shamelessly shucks and jives as if she were auditioning to be cast as Dandy [ “Jim” on the original model sheets] Crow in the stage revival of Dumbo, that doesn’t mean she can’t have some fun with it.  And even better, they could call her Candy Crow instead, and all she’d have to do to deliver an Oscar-worthy performance as it were, is to simply pretend that she was being interviewed by Tucker Carlson, in regards to the subject of systematic racism.

But you have to give this latest routine some props though, because after mewling the last year screaming tyranny anytime COVID protocols and treatments are mentioned, she now presents herself as their noble and embattled champion. Point of order, Candyass? You don’t get to dictate what is or isn’t political, nor what a community should do to protect its citizens when you post Twitter comments stating how you purposefully, won’t undertake the merest of actions required to protect the ones you allegedly love.

With no due respect, your personal credibility has more holes in it than can be found at a pornstar convention. However, at least those women, unlike you, are more than comfortable admitting that they swallow random penill, both literal and metaphorical, for their expected payday.

Now, while it’s been a bit since we’ve heard from Walter, we can have full confidence that that he wants a slice of the non-vaccinated hate-cake too, and he dives back in, pairing it with this delightful side-dish, full of self-owning privilege and paranoid misinformation- say what you will, the man knows his milieu:
Correct me if I’m reading this wrong h,, but it seems my newest BFF Wally here, is just more than a bit concerned that he might lose his mythical God-given right to his body sovereignty, and having his options to make his own healthcare decisions limited. If the act of getting vaccinated finds itself legislated from being a suggestion to an unavoidable requirement, I could see why he’d be overly concerned about it. is that accurate, pr am I just seeing things that aren’t there, like Walter tends to do?

Add, he does so, I might add, without the aid of hallucinogens… well, illegal ones anyway, as OAN, Newsmax, and Sean Hannity’s stoking of nonsensical fears, are all still quite sadly, not breaking any mandated laws, save for the ones regarding truth, decency, and what was once the American way. But I understand why the very thought of being powerless regarding that which should remain private, would keep one up at night. I mean, can you just imagine the indignity and frustration of having people unknown to you, dictating what you could and could not do with your own body?

Terrifying situation to find oneself in, isn’t it, Walter? You bet it is. Interestingly, you now have kind of a glimpse into what it’s like to be the 24/7 owner of a uterus, and having to constantly fight off the sanctimonious inferences of jackasses like you, demanding full and unfettered oversight of conclusions that you have no right, morally or legally, to make for others. As tp the rest of your hysterically unaware rant, it’s not like there’s vaccine squads patrolling your neighborhood forcing the “jab” upon you, nor will there ever be.

If I chose to be exceedingly gracious, I’d suggest that this could be a teaching moment for you, that used your [paranoic feelings to cast an uncomfortable light upon your own hypocrisy, but I already know that you’re incapable of facing the reality as it presents itself. Others of far better eloquence might vireo this as a miserable state of affairs for you, but I, being far less diplomatic, know that for your dumb ass, it’s just another Tuesday.

The enduring COVID pandemic is a hot button topic for many within the conservative movement, and despite overwhelming evidence that people continue to die and suffer the aftereffects of a disease that crystallizes your lungs, they still decry the valid science as false, masking protocols as tyranny, and disseminate a myriad of truly insane, inept, and wholly fabricated conspiracy theories that are so logically implausible, even Ron L. Hubbard would have given their ideology and its followers, the cold shoulder

Keep in mind,  he created a religion where not only did he claim intimate knowledge of an ancient interplanetary civilization, he then went on to construct a Faith based on an absurd concept in which, millions of its denizens were decimated and then evolved into what Scientologists call “body thetans,” beings who, and I swear I am not making this up,  latch onto humans, and then cause those very same humans to suffer personal trauma.

In essence, they’re like Republicans, but far more dedicated to Humanity, and tend to be invisible, which not only serves as a perfect analog for just how the GQP views its personal responsibility to keeping others safe, it makes it far easier to craft this blatant con job into an actual religious conviction. But never let it not be noted that Leyba can’t embarrass himself just as efficiently as Walter does, especially when it comes to the specific topic of attempting to manage the spread of this virulent disease:Looking at this temper tantrum disguised as the shrillest of political observations, all I can state in retort, is that it’s really going to suck when he realizes that if he follows his meme to the letter, he’ll never be able to walk into any business again that has a “No shirt, no shoes, no service”, sign posted in their window, as well as any attraction, venue, or airport that necessitates tickets and ID, as he was rather specific, in regards to his whole “Requires anything to enter”, declaration of his.

In addendum, this punitive position definitely rules out most bars that ask for ID, and for that matter just so happen to take all strip clubs off of the proverbial map as a rule.

And while yes, that does include those places where the “Thunder from Down Under” performs as well, Ricky, but given today’s technological advances, I’m sure you can always download a performance of it off the Net.  Now, regarding your battle call for an instituted boycott, as I noted in the first chapter of this toxic tale, I’m sure it will be just as efficacious as all of the other ones you’ve failed to make a dent with, over the last few years.

But Ricky, being a man of letters, isn’t the type to place all of his narcissistic embargoes in one boycotting basket by using the threat of economic ruin, he’s going to fall back on his go-to lucky token, who this time around, is going to speak for the most vulnerable pf our citizens, even though no one asked her to, and in a move we all saw coming, the woman who whined about not being able to be tested for COVID as she simultaneously twittered proudly about being a selfish cow, threw them under her ego bus:
If I may, I’d like to elucidate an earlier statement that I made, wherein I called Ricky a “man of letters”. At the time, I truly had no idea that those letters were going to be “F” and “U”. I sincerely apologize. I will go on to say this though- man, when Candy’s career as a shrilling shrew hits its eventual zenith, she might want to consider a secondary career in renting her genitalia out as an ice storage facility, because this c**t is cold.

Whether or not the vulnerable were asked or not, wanting to help people regardless, is for most of us, the sign of a fully functioning human being, unless of course, you’re a racist vanilla wafer that’s been dipped in a low-grade chocolate substitute, and then repackaged as a spokesperson for the blandest walking among us. And as for the supposed issue of “trillion-dollar wealth transfers”, it isn’t the middle class that’s playing three-card-Monte with the greenbacks these days, you tweeting twat- that’s your crew.

I don’t know anything about her family dynamic, but after reading her tweet, I’d have to wonder aloud if her idea of a thoughtful gift for a sick relative is an economically-priced home version of the Do-It-Yourself Dr. Kevorkian Kit. Going one step further, I bet when her relatives are forced to offer up a hug, they probably worry about contracting a bad case of frostbite. On the upside however, I’d also have to think that she can perfectly chill a bottle of wine in seconds flat. Trust me. I’ve got a million zingers like this, but I’ll move on for the sake of my audience.

So, the vaccine recommended by the CDC, is now equitable to the actions of the NAZI’s in WW2? Well then, my walking glory-hole for a cabal of conservative Massa, let’s dissect your abominable analogy, using only the facts as they are, not as you’d like them to be. As this moment in time, [August, 2021] total individual doses of the various vaccines number around 339 million, given to an estimated 187.2 million people. This sets the number of fully vaccinated Americans somewhat just above the halfway mark.

Sadly, between December 2020, and July 2021, the CDC’s Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System (VAERS) established that there were 6,207 reported deaths amid people who got a vaccine, but this does not infer or even prove, that the vaccine caused these particular deaths I will not in any way, shape or form, imply that these deaths are anything less than tragic, but statistically, they present a death rate of 0.0018%, as specified by the total numbers inoculated.

When one looks at these numbers objectively, rather than with a barely disguised agenda, the data overall, presents as fairly positive. And if the numbers are so analytically low, then why is the Right so concerned, given how much they proudly post the survival rates of COVID as being around 96%? For those of you who are bad at math, a rate of 0.0018% is lower than 4%, no matter what side of the political fence you are, and trust me on this, everybody looks the same when they’re attached to a ventilator.

And yet, this data is somehow equivalent to the atrocities foisted upon humanity by the NAZI’s? As much as these medical illiterates’ rant that it is, reality easily proves that it’s not. I could note the untold millions subjected to the act of genocide, undertaken with nationalistic pride by the dual actions of concentration camps and squads of Einsatzgruppen, but why do that, when I can observe Leyba and his ilk, paralleling what is essentially a paper cut at best, to you know… an entire race of innocent person being forced at gunpoint to strip naked, and then be gassed to death inside a sealed room?

Poor baby. I can only hope someone out there has the foresight to found a charity to help ease all of your suffering. I’ll provide some examples of this false narrative being one of the more popular tropes currently being shopped around the universe of alternative facts that conservatives wallow in, no matter what contrary evidence may exist.This warning brought to you by someone who views getting a free (and voluntary) shot to keep others safe, as being akin to being a witness to, and a victim of targeted genocide, but carry on, my modern-day Anne Frank.

I won’t speak for you, but there’s no better way for someone to prove to me they’re a complete f**king idiot, like when they whip out a knowingly vile symbol of hatred and prejudice, to justify their own highly asinine point of view. Good job, Ricky- you singlehandedly just proved correct, what a lot of your high school teachers initially thought about you.There have been very few times in my life that I have found myself stunned into silence by something I’ve either seen or read, but in the future, this one may actually be in the top five. The first two, involving women I was in love with, and the third being when I met Debbie Harry of Blondie fame, backstage in the year of 1999. In retrospect, that technically makes the first three things about women I was in love with, but this definitely slides right in above those, and just before that unfortunate incident Iin New Orleans involving a table, an oyster bar, and a half-drunk fifth of Fireball.

It should not be necessary for me at any point in time to have to say this, whether it be out loud as I have had to do as of late, or in type, as I’m currently doing now, but the only thing that’s ever been “like the Holocaust”, is, without any doubt, THE ACTUAL F**KING HOLOCAUST itself. Nothing else comes close. Not mask mandates, required job-related vaccinations, social distancing, or even restrictions on how many rolls of TP you can buy at one time.

F**k, when I was in high school back in the late 80’s, only three students were allowed to be in the Circle K across from my high school at any given time during our lunch hour, sans backpacks, no less, and I never started ranting lunacies about tyranny and suffering undesired road trips inside cattle cars, just because they always seemed to run out of Jolt Cola and Kit-Kats just before I got there, but ask someone in this selfish-ass over-privileged country, to be mildly inconvenienced for thirty goddamn seconds, and you’ll instantly find yourself face to face with a reincarnated *Freddie Oversteegen.  

*[Freddie Oversteegen was a member of the Dutch resistance during World War II, and was one of its most dangerous assassins. Together with her sister, she lured, ambushed, and killed German Nazis and their Dutch collaborators- truly, a badass across the board.]

Overall, I’d consider myself a rather peaceful man, despite the causticness of my written words, and hell, I’d even describe myself as mostly gregarious, even at the worst of times, but I will tell you this now… iI I ever find myself trapped in an elevator with the mental defective that scribed this exercise of tone deaf histrionic self-righteous tripe, not only will I give them a piece of my mind, I’m first going to open their skull, if only to see how much of it isn’t filled with theirs. 

Normally, this would be the part where I would add with my tongue planted firmly in cheek, the phrase; “metaphorically of course”, as a modifier of sorts to allude that I was only kidding, but in this case, I’d more than happily subject this delusional moron to the act of being forced to scrutinize the death camp footage shot at wars’ end by noted filmmakers John Ford, Samuel Fuller, and George Stevens, daring them afterwards, to tell me to my face,  that getting the jab is the same f**king thing and in the same league as what they just viewed..

I may not believe in God, lady- but I’d happily convert to Judaism, if it meant I could throat-punch you without any form of repercussion for what you just purported as factual information. And as for Leyba happily posting it as such? Well, I’d make the same offer of signing up to Satan himself, dependent on the condition that he’d let me grill some fine steaks using the fire pit that Leyba will allegedly be doing the back-stroke in for eternity, once he discovers for himself, that God prefers educated atheists, over willfully ignorant Christians.

Once again, I’m just kidding, as I’ve had a key to Satan’s place for years now, and because it is Hell, the daily menu is always going to be based in Veganism. Enjoy your soy cheese, Rickster, and when they ask you exactly where you want the pitchfork placed, just know that I’ll leave them a suggestion as to just where they should stick it. In an attempt to lighten the mood, Walter has presented to us this finely crafted meme, wherein he uses one of the dumbest characters ever in television’s history, to make an even more absurd assertion.

Uncharacteristically, I truly feel that using Homer Simpson to exemplify his point, was a shrewd choice on Walter’s part- after all, not only is Homer the perfect representation of Walter’s allegedly limited intellect, cartoons are probably the only form pf media that doesn’t challenge it in the first place:There may be a few of you at this moment, wondering why my claws are so far out in regards to these particularly dense examples of what transpires when ignorance and hateful hubris mate successfully, and I will inform the crowd as to why this is, in the most elegant way possible: I’M SICK AND TIRED OF LISTENING TO GODDAMN MORONS WHO THINK THAT YOUTUBE IS A CREDIBLE “SOURCE”, AND THAT ESTABLISHED SCIENCE AND IT’S PRACTITIONERS, ARE FRAUDULENT CON-MEN, WORKING FOR THE “DEEP STATE”.

I truly hope that clears things up for you- if it does not, my sincerest apologies. Specific regrets though, are not impending whereas Walter and the words I’ve used to describe him are concerned, for much like Leyba and his erroneous egocentricity in regards to broadcasting blatant propaganda, he gets what he believes wholeheartedly to be factual, dead f**king wrong. As always.Sigh… if Walter’s intellect were a character in a zombie movie, it would definitely be the one that opens the heavily padlocked door spray-painted with the words, “Warning- Dead Inside”, without a second thought. Or a first one, for that matter. The law of averages would suggest that, possibly one day, Walter might actually do some research before he types out his visualization of what the voices in his head scream, but given the empirical evidence I’ve seen thus far, I’d have better luck betting on Rob Schneider winning an Oscar for his on-point portrayal of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.

Why do I say this?

Well, it has everything to do with the fact that the infrastructure of government albeit federal, tribal, state, or local, is essentially crucial to the successful protection of the public’s health and general safety. This agency, partially derived from the U.S. Constitution’s 10th Amendment, gives state governments powers not specifically given to the federal government, in order to curtail the spread of infectious diseases within their legal jurisdiction. This in turn, permits them a broad latitude in regards to enacting emergency health measures, ranging from the implementation of quarantine, to the restricting of businesses.

Now, while the federal government’s power is limited to certain circumstances. It does still possess comprehensive authority to execute measures to avert the spread of illnesses, regardless of whether the initial source of infection is from outside, or from within, the United States. In addition, governors can also

order quarantines to isolate and limit the movement of citizens exposed to communicable disease, as well as ordering stay at home directives, granting exclusions only, for essential medical procedures, necessary employment, or the acquiring of food.

They can also set in place, restrictive curfews as well, although the laws allowing the necessitating of such, vary from state to state. The legal authority behind these controversial measures, has been reinforced by several key legal pronouncements, that have been legislated over the course of this country’s storied history. I won’t run through the list entire, as it would make this story-arc longer than a conversation with me regarding what the best Star Wars movie is, but I will address at least one, for the benefit of educating those people, who, unlike Walter, want to actually know what they’re talking about.

The particular legal challenge I’ll be presenting, is just one of the many United States Supreme Court  case studies that I could choose to highlight, ranging from 1824’s Gibbons v. Ogden, to 1902’s Compagnie Francaise & Company vs. the Louisiana State Board of Health, which ironically, I did address in a blogvella of mine some months back. Reality is circular, kids. And don’t you ever forget it.

1905’s Jacobson v. Massachusetts, is what I’ll be talking about, and the ruling that emerged from it, was that the United States Supreme Court upheld the authority of individual states to impose compulsory vaccination laws. The Court’s decision articulated the view that individual liberty is not absolute and is subject to the police power of the state. So zip it, smallpox Karens, because this decision was set in stone long before your brains turned into the same.

Some context: Massachusetts at the time, was one of only 11 states that had compulsory vaccination laws in place, due to an outbreak of smallpox in 1902. Adults who refused to accept the vaccination, were subject to a five-dollar fine, or the purchasing power equivalent of about $158.72, today. Pastor Henning Jacobson, originally from Sweden, allegedly had an unpleasant reaction to a similar vaccine administered during his childhood, and claimed that the experience had mentally scarred him with a “lifelong horror of the practice”. This in turn, led to his staunch refusal to take the current vaccine.

Believing that his family could be endangered by the vaccine due to a hereditary condition within his family, Jacobson found himself prosecuted, and penalized with the aforementioned five-dollar fine. For the next three years, he contended that his being levied a fine, or facing possible incarceration for his actions, was not only an invasion of his liberty, he maintained that the law itself was “unreasonable, arbitrary and oppressive”, and that he, or any other individual, should not be forcefully compelled to follow it.

Supreme Court Justice John Marshall Harlan delivered the 7 to 2 decision, stating that the Massachusetts law did not violate the Fourteenth Amendment, declaring that “in every well-ordered society charged with the duty of conserving the safety of its members the rights of the individual in respect of his liberty may at times, under the pressure of great dangers, be subjected to such restraint, to be enforced by reasonable regulations, as the safety of the general public may demand” noting as well that,; “real liberty for all could not exist under the operation of a principle which recognizes the right of each individual person to use his own liberty, whether in respect of his person or his property, regardless of the injury that may be done to others.”

In closing, the Court did acknowledge however, that the obligation of vaccination for specific individuals in extreme circumstances, could be classified as “cruel and inhuman[e]”, in which case, courts would be permitted to interfere in order to “prevent wrong and oppression”, for those specific persons “in a particular condition of health”, Nevertheless, the statute in question was not, according to the Court, “intended to be applied to such a case” and professed the belief that Jacobson “did not offer to prove that, by reason of his then condition, he was, in fact, not a fit subject of vaccination”

.In essence, for all of you Plague enthusiasts out there, what this ruling says, in relation to your unfounded, uneducated, and hilariously histrionic argument, and that, ever so clearly, is this
And I can only hope, that you undertake your new assignment, with the same enthusiasm that you’ve shown over the last year or so, when it came to embarrassing yourself, your grade school teachers, and as always, your family. I’m fairly confident that if a psychiatrist ever ha the chance to sit Ricky down for a [in my opinion] much-needed therapy session, he’d hold court for quite some time, rationalizing that his paranoiac position isn’t built on junk science as well as inane ideology, it’s based in genuine concern.

Surprisingly, his main concern doesn’t encompass what we’ve seen thus far, which if you remember, involves Deep State conspiracy theory, non-existent election fraud, the threat of “commies”, from 1955, I guess? Hollywood’s alleged moral decay, the insidiousness of “feminine influence”, and most disturbingly, his seemingly ongoing obsession with the genitalia of gay and transgender persons unknown to him.

None of that even comes close, because what he’s truly worried about is the loss of his “freedom”, even if he doesn’t truly know what the actual definition of that word is. In fact, he seems even more confused than I tend to be whenever I read one of his analogies that make no goddamn sense, regardless of what angle you try to look at it from:

So, let me get this straight… refusing to assume the simplest of social responsibilities as a precautional measure to curb the ravages of a highly infectious virus, that by the way, has killed over 650K Americans so far, is JUST THE SAME as eating raw cookie dough. Did I get that right? Oh, good. I was worried that I was in the middle of having a stroke, and no one had been kind enough to inform me.

A few minor points of contention, if I may, you ignorant Influenzer? While it’s been many years since I sat down with a log of Pillsbury Cookie Dough with a Pesto-Bismol chaser afterwards, I’m pretty sure it still doesn’t compare to the procedure of being intubated, as your lungs crystalize. The only people who were ever directly affected by the decision n my mid-20’s to purposefully risk stomach cramps, were my then-girlfriend who needed to cook those cookies into a necessary tray for Sharon’s wedding shower, and my best friend, who was the only person I knew at the time, who would reliably deliver that aforesaid quart of Pepto.

If you just so happen to be one of the estimated fourteen-percent requiring hospitalization, five-percent of you will find themselves in the ICU, and citing the current [at the time of this writing] mortality statistics, at least 3.9% of you who contracted the virus will succumb to the ferocity of its effects. And for all of the smallpox fanciers out there, here’s how it happens- coronavirus enters the body through the nose, mouth or eyes. Once inside the body, it corrupts healthy cells, and then re-tools them to replicate itself. When the cells are filled to capacity, they burst, rapidly setting in motion, the rate of overall infection.

Symptoms can persist for months, and cause severe damage to the lungs such as scarring, along with long-term issues, regarding ti the heart and brain, as well as fatigue, difficulty breathing, pain in the joints, muscles, and chest, struggles with concentration and memory, insomnia, loss of the ability to smell or taste, episodes of depression or anxiety, along with fever, and a sense of dizziness,

But other than those almost negligible differences, including an agonizing death, the similarities to eating a Pillsbury tube served exceedingly rare, is so disturbingly close, they could almost be mistaken for twins.  Sort of the same way I’d naturally assume, that Leyba’s ass and face might tend to be. However, when it comes to that joke, I’m also certain that if I were given enough time to seek out empirical evidence, I’d most certainly find to my personal satisfaction at least, that it’s a very common occurrence.

I earlier referenced Leyba’s speculative terror at losing his “freedom”, but in my role as a writer, I failed, and rather neglectfully at that, to detail exactly what those particular freedoms were. You have no idea how embarrassed I was when I realized this, but then I remember that I’m not even close to the frequency with which Ricky does it, so I’m good in general.

Fortunately, when it came to my uncharacteristic lapse in storytelling, a professional, truly versed in the art of imaginary victimhood stepped up like the badass he never was or will be, to list exactly what was at stake: Don’t get me wrong, I cannot wait to rip this latest piece of fallacious fluff apart in the manner of a drunken David Hasselhoff spying a floor-level cheeseburger, but c’mon Ricky…  could you at least present a challenge, for once?Wow… I knew things in this country were bad, but I never would have surmised that they were this bad. I guess I might have had some idea. if I had only watched FOX ”News” more often. Honestly, I would have been more than happy to be in the loop, but Sean Hannity’s chin gives me nightmares about sentient scrotums slathered in hair gel, and hearing the vehemently vanilla Valkyrie Goebbels -screech that is Tucker Carlson’s voice, just makes me want to sucker punch a box of Pumpkin Spice flavored Moon Pies, and they’ve done absolutely nothing to me.

And although within this meme, which he most certainly did not create, but surely stole as if he were a Trump overseeing a children’s charity, Leyba whines about supposed others being “offended” at what he wants to do, the true offense one might feel at his as always baseless charges, stems not from his chosen activities, but at the reality that no one of any note has ever given a damn about them in the first place.   

Trust me on this, Ricky. There’s plenty of stuff we can use to make fun of you, and quite easily, I might add. So, you really, honestly, most assuredly, don’t have to invent new stuff on our behalf. Some advice, from me to you-, and free of charge, no less. If you still feel the need to fabricate fallacies, may I recommend that you at least take more than thirty seconds to come up with ones that are far more plausible, for Christ’s sake?

Now, if I were to be brutally honest with myself, I’d much rather let this particular sliver of vapid victimhood go, given the level of sheer f**king density that I’ve already waded through, but I simply can’t. , ethics and all that. Not to mention, it’s simply too much fun melting holes in your *Pykrete armada, using your very own [partially] words to do so.
*[Pykrete is a frozen alloy, made of a mix of14% wood pulp to 86% ice, using a weight ratio of six to one. It was at one point, seriously considered as a possible construction material in regards to the British Royal Navy fleet.]

To start us off, let me just state publicly that; “Rudolph” is a terrible movie with a terrible message, that being: Conform or Else. Every time I watch it, I’m genuinely surprised that Santa doesn’t have Hermey killed for wanting to be a dentist, instead of being a nameless cog within a Machina of indentured servitude. But just like “A Charlie Brown Christmas”, which suffers a similar plot curse of characters you just want to throat-punch due to their awfulness, no one of any cultural importance has ever thwarted its annual airing schedule.

To start us off, let me just state publicly that; “Rudolph” is a terrible movie with a terrible message, that being: Conform or Else. Every time I watch it, I’m genuinely surprised that Santa doesn’t have Hermey killed for wanting to be a dentist, instead of being a nameless cog within a Machina of indentured servitude. But just like “A Charlie Brown Christmas”, which suffers a similar plot curse of characters you just want to throat-punch due to their awfulness, no one of any cultural importance has ever thwarted its annual airing schedule.

If you did your so-called research in the same way that you’re obsessing over 57-year-old cartoons, not only would I have nothing to write about, I’d probably have to apologize, as well. This brings us to your second alleged “point”, regarding the singing of two American winter-themed classics. It’s fairly obvious that you’ve missed the reason as to why people complain about these two ditties, and I have serious reservations that you even know what the lyrics are to begin with. But take all the time you need to mewl your faux offense.

Moving forward, your use of the phrases “bring home the bacon”, and “kill two birds with one stone”, has never offended anyone, nor has any singular person expressed such an asinine assumption to you, either. Too bad. We all have our delusions, far be it for me to take away yours. I am however, terribly sorry that you’ve “had it with all this political correctness”, which by the way, is the most genteel way for society at large to inform you, that being an ignorant jackass is no longer considered tolerable.

Use your disingenuousness to mold a few more bricks for the wall going up around you, that’s what. Now, some of you may have noticed that Walter has seemingly taken a leave of absence from my overview, but nothing could be further from the truth. It’s just that at the moment, he literally has nothing to add to the topic at hand, and is therefore, currently sitting on the sidelines, as it were. But don’t you fret, as Wally, along with Ricky, (naturally) will be back on the menu when the third installment of this serialized screed is presented for your enjoyment.

And yes, there will be a third detailed narrative, as there’s still so much more to mock concerning these two. What can I say? Mythical God provides, and when he does, the Son comes bearing Asian strippers wearing thigh boots, let me tell you. As much as I’d like to wax rhapsodic about what’s to come, I need to finish what’s in front of me, and that just so happens to be, an overflowing bowl of clueless self-ownership, with which, we will conclude this section of the soon-to-be-continued story-arc.
Never let it be said that Leyba doesn’t have convictions. Granted, most of them seem to be based in ignorant paranoia, a sense of warped religious zealotry, and a fear of anything that actually involves elevating the betterment of humanity in general, but I digress. Ironically, Ricky shares the same fear revealed by Walter earlier, regarding the sanctity of one’s body autonomy, while simultaneously demanding, that women surrender theirs willingly.

So, Ricky’s cool with that option, but don’t you dare suggest that he offer up his inanity to protect or possibly, even save others. Weird how that works, huh? Friendly reminder, Ricky: you don’t get a say in legislating abortion rights, until you can bring a uterus of your very own to the table. And preferably, not one that you found within the confines of an overfilled crawlspace.

Nonetheless, abortion isn’t the only topic cares about, he’s also pretty interested in politics too, unless of course it once again, highlights his insincerity. In regards to a certain topic. For instance, take note of how he feels about presidential authority to issue Executive Orders, which despite his never having mentioning it before, has obviously been eating at him for some time now:

For the laymen among us, an executive order is a method utilized by a sitting US president to issue federal directives. The legal basis for doing so, stems from Article Two of the United States Constitution as Leyba accurately described, as well as expressed or implied Acts of Congress, that delegate to the president, a measured degree of discretionary power. In simpler terms, this grants the president broad executive latitude to govern enforcement of the law, or how to best utilize the resources of the executive branch.

However, executive orders can be put under judicial review, and if said orders are found to be be wanting by either law or Constitutional veracity, they can be reversed. Presidential executive orders, once issued, endure until they are either annulled, rescinded, arbitrated as illegitimate, or are allowed to expire. Interestingly, the sitting president may cancel, amend or decree exclusions in regards to any executive order, notwithstanding under which president it was issued, past or present.

For some reason, Leyba’s really concerned about the fifty-seven that Joe Biden has issued thus far, concerning raising the minimum wage of federal contract workers to $15 an hour, starting in early 2022, to directing the Department of Housing and Urban Development to review the Trump administration’s regulatory actions for their effects on fair housing and to then, “take steps necessary” to comply with the Fair Housing Act, but yet sees nothing wrong with the 220 that Trump decreed, during his disastrous, and thankfully, one-term presidency.

Maybe it’s because many of the ones that Trump signed went out of their way to hurt the innocent and the powerless? Nah, it couldn’t be that simple, could it? After all, just because Leyba still slavishly supports a man once described as a ‘Successful sociopath’ and predator who ‘lacks a conscience and empathy”, by Lance M. Dodes, MD, a former assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, is no reason to assume that Leyba shares the same defective quirks of character, now is it?

Of course not. Leyba himself, is obviously not a sociopath. He just so happens to be an ardent fan of one, that’s all, and I’m sure that there’s absolutely nothing worrying to take away from that. But Leyba’s hypocrisy isn’t content to just screw with women’s body autonomy, or the political process itself, no siree Bob. He’s also quite troubled by the illegal drug trade too, which even I will admit, is a valid concern, especially when it comes to the devastating effect they’ve had on communities, albeit one that’s White or of mixed race.

In fact, here’s a meme about the subject that he “borrowed”, because thinking for yourself is hard:
For those of you who bothered to read this all the way through, it actually does raise some good points, the key word there being “some”. Because when it comes to the rest where the true author of this DARE ad run amuck, manages to conflate politics, the issue of bail, drugged drivers, and human trafficking, all I can say is this- if Leyba;s ever had an original idea accidentally wander into his head, it would marvel at all the free space it would have all to itself.

The main impression that one naturally, would take away from this posting, is that Leyba, like most modern-day conservatives, is strongly anti-drug, pro-law enforcement, and obviously, really into punitive overkill for drug dealers,  as well as their addicted victims, which when given pause, underpins that whole Christian hypocrisy standard, but that’s a discussion for another time. So, if Leyba truly believes that “legalizing drugs will cause more crime”, as this meme erroneously states, then why would he go on to publicly declare this contradictory reversal of opinion?Speaking fir myself, I have no idea why he did, but I’m starting to =think that there’s a Tupperware full of brownies in his fridge that are marked “special”, and I’ll leave it at that. Despite Marijuana being legalized in no less than 18 states, it’s still considered a controlled substance in the remainder, and therefore “illegal”, depending on what state you find yourself in, an observation, which when applied to your mental one on any given day, should probably be noted as “confused”, at best.

The logical assumption here is that Ricky doesn’t understand the thorny issue of cannabis legalization, and you’d most likely be correct, but there’s more to it than that, and as usual, the crux of it all stems from the Right managing to take a non-related concern and meld it with whatever QAN told them to be furiously offended about this week. See, for the last few months now, conservatives have been decrying the fact that the COVID vaccine wasn’t “FDA approved”, as a means to justify their steadfast refusal to take it. But now that it is…

All of a sudden, the FDA has no credibility whatsoever, despite their employing actual virologists to explain why they should, and the Right using Kevin Sorbo [TV’s Hercules] and YouTube videos to defend their ludicrous position as to why they shouldn’t. But then again, I could be wrong about this take of mine, all things being possible, and maybe the answer is that Ricky wasn’t confused at all when he posted this inconsistent thought, maybe he was just really baked, and hit the wrong “send’ button when he was trying to do nothing more than order some after-munchies from DoorDash.

Speaking of dashing to doors, we come to the last one Ill be kicking open this time around. And you, my lucky Blogiteers, get tp come through it with me, as I reveal what Ricky regards as the most formidable of weapons inside a Typhoid Trumpers’ toolbox, and no, it isn’t a well-measured debate, as some of you may have already deduced. Nope, the scariest armament that can be dispersed among the tin-foil-hatted brigade of Corona Kyles and Karens, is the ever so worrisome mention, inference, whisper, rumor or suggested threat of being possibly… you guessed it, BOYCOTTED.

Spurned. Embargoed. Shunned. Rebuffed. Informed that your presence is no longer required or desired. Being given the cold shoulder. Watching potential customers walk by, rather than walk in, based on a very public difference of ideology or ethics. And it can ruin a business, let me tell you. That is, unless of course, the people who are allegedly “boycotting” you, are ones that have never shopped there to begin with, like our whiny wannabe economic warrior here.

Confident in my belief that Leyba is one of this irrelevant if not financially impotent ilk, his soon-to-be-shown as pathetic attempts at intimidating policies he disagrees with out of existence, not only fall flatter than a Kansas pancake, they also possess the tensile strength of Charlie Sheen’s promises to lay off the porn-star girlfriends and Peruvian marching powder. You need to see the goods, apparently. I can tell. I’m sharp like that.

So, let’s all enjoy his QAnon-tipped lancet of justice, and revel in the fact that like almost all of the boycotts these mewling morons have launched, it’ll be about as effective at taking root, in the same exact way that their grade-school education did.  
Considering that this brave ideological stand pf yours Ricky, means that your dumber than f**k, entirely selfish, and completely un-vaccinated ass, won’t be standing next to our far smarter ones, this really isn’t the menace that you believe it represents, or intend it to be. Just thought you should know, as it looks like you’re about to have a lot of free time to ponder exactly what happened to your already limited, social engagement schedule. Nevertheless, Leyba changes course yet again, and posts this… I guess you’d call it a retraction? A symptom of undiagnosed Bi-polar disorder, or an aneurysm, perhaps?As a group exercise, let’s all try to follow the Chutes and Ladders level logic of a man so transparently misinformed, that even the Greys who abduct humans named Billy Hoe Bob as a form of intergalactic cow tipping, would take a pass at anally probing him, out of the valid fear they might damage his brain.

To clarify, Leyba won’t offer his patronage to any business that demands proof of vaccination for its customers of employees, practices masking protocols, or advocates for social distancing, but he’s also a big proponent of supporting those commercial entities that have been put most at risk, due to the economic fallout of the COVID pandemic. Yeah… that’s not a convoluted thought process at work, now is it? Dude, I get it. You want to platy both odds against the middle, but JFC, everybody in your life, whether an intimate contact, or one that’s peripheral, already knows you’re a half-assed hypocrite, so relax.

In closing out this this rapidly accruing archive of arrogant a**holery, I present out last entry for now anyway, and it hits all the low spots we’ve come to expect from our resident example of why the need to invent an unbreakable condom, should become a national scientific priority. Along with a cure for willful ignorance, flavored to taste like Trump’s boots, so that Cult 45 members like Leyba, will swallow it without question. Come to think of it, maybe we should try that with the vaccine first, and move out from there.

It couldn’t hurt, unlike this last nugget of lunacy, straight out of the fingers of a nattering nincompoop.Many moons ago, when I had found myself engaged to be married to the entirely wrong person, I heard them say what was up until now, the dumbest thing that I had ever heard come out of somebody’s mouth: “This is just like that time we went to Sara’s party, and I wore that blue dress.”, To which, my then best friend who was in the room with me, uttered, and with a healthy dose of directed side eye, no less; “I’ve been married almost ten years, and I have no f**king idea what in the hell your girlfriend is talking about.”

Thanks to yet another one of Leyba’s appropriated memes, I may now have to go and track her down, to apologize for implying that she was an idiot, And that’s even with her history of adultery, mind you. That’s how goddamn stupid this is by comparison. In respect to what my ex was apparently trying to say, the only answer I received was; “Well, if you don’t know, then I’m not going to tell you”. Which, to be fair, was far less maddening then trying to make sense of this exercise in full-blown psychosis.

Speaking honestly, I’m not even sure how Ricky even managed to find this mélange of a meme, but I’m kind of glad he did, because I, for one, would love to frequent a restaurant owned by Demons, for not only would the food and decor be amazing, being sinfully decadent and all that, but can you imagine the bands that would be booked to play there on the weekends?

Early 70’s era Black Sabbath with Ozzy. 1984 era Iron Maiden. 1977 era KISS.1983 era Motley Crue, the any era is cool, reincarnated corpse of Ronnie James Dio, and last, but certainly not least, current era Nickelback, because the only way those guys have ever managed to maintain a career, must be due to the direct influence of Satan himself. Restaurant ownership that caters to the demonic demographic… what franchise marketing will those clever bastards at Starbucks come up with next?

Oops… I may have read that wrong.

It seems that our poster child for paranoia, Ricky here, may have been referring to the small business owners he claims to support unequivocally as “demons”, because of their professional adherence to following established health protocols aimed at keeping their employees and customers alike, safe during the pandemic. Sorry, in relation to keeping my latest blogvella subject emotionally invested, I should have used the descriptive of either “Scamdemic”, or “Plandemic”, lust in case Ricky is having an actual adult read this back to him, as I do like to keep my audience riveted.

Riveted or not, however, Leyba’s dire warning that he’ll do his own cooking as a manly opening gambit to test his curiosity of  “which one of us will survive”, is without question, one of the most flaccid coercions he’s uttered thus far, especially when you realize that his current diet consists mostly of Swanson Lonely-Man microwave entrees, and the salt they contain alone, will put him out of commission long before the lack of effect from his impotent boycott will, in regards to any of the bistros he’s targeted with his wussy wrath.

Once again Ricky, in order to “boycott” a business or any product for that matter, you have to be either a regular patron or purchaser of it first, for your actions to have any relevance in the end. Seriously. Didn’t they teach you that during your online “middle age rage” workshop? Normally, I’d suggest you ask for your money back, but we all know your check bounced to begin with. I’m kidding, I’m kidding… nobody would waste their time and precious energy trying to educate a rice cake, so why would they deem you to be the rare exception to that rule?

The reality of your derisory posturing, is that if there’s a specific café that you’ve been frequenting and have now stopped doing so, because it’s owners and denizens don’t want their fellow Americans to die, odds are pretty good that across the board, your presence is probably not missed al all, and your insipid whining about your non-applicable rights, sure as heck isn’t, either.

So please, Ricky… threaten the business community at large, by buying groceries from one of the numerous marketplaces in a town where EVERYBODY is following the health mandates, and by depriving us of your odiously abrasive presence out among the general public- that’ll definitely show us who’s really the boss of who here. The answer to that question, is fairly obvious to those of us who, unlike you, have actually been paying attention since this all started. We are.

Nonetheless though, you really shouldn’t worry, as we still have a place at the kid;s table for you, and the best part of your new position, is that it’s all due to the hard work and long hours you’ve spent engaged in establishing yourself as an icon of mockery for the future. Let us know, when you can, what it feels like to be the soon to be fired employee who, quite literally… did it to himself.

Unless of course, your breathing is being done by a tube at that point, in which case, we’ll just assume you’ve gotten everything you ever wanted. No vaccine being pumped into your veins, still able to boycott as effectively as you were doing before. And let’s not forget, a once in a lifetime chance to test out that whole working theory of “which one of us will survive”, that you’ve been espousing.

Good luck with all of that. I’m sure it will work out for the best, just like the rest of your philosophy has.

There. Done for now. And when we come back, I take a detour from Part 3 to jot down a few new thoughts about a truly lost lamb in my small community, its allegedly morally ambiguous shepherd, and how the Word of the all-mythical God is not only intentionally misinterpreted by its staunchest advocates, but also why they are compelled to do so, in the first place. And I’m sure that their finding the one true God out of the 2000+currently available, whose personal bias aligns perfectly with their own, was nothing more than a fortuitous happenstance.

Mysterious ways, and all that.

“The modern conservative is engaged in one of man’s oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.” – John Kenneth Galbraith