Wayne Michael Reich

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Month: May 2023

The Art of Gerry-slandering. Pt.4 (The Last Tale of a Village-seeking Idiot)

“Information is all around us, now more than ever before in human history. You barely have to stir or incommode yourself to find things out. The only reason people do not know much is because they do not care to know. They are incurious. Incuriosity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is.”

– Stephen Fry, The Fry Chronicles

Salutations, Bitchiteers!

Before I begin this, the newest of my screeds, a necessary definition first: “Politics: the art or science of government.” Now, for most of us whose brains work the way that Nature intended them to, this in and of itself, is not a hard concept to grasp, even if the subtle nuances associated with it, may sometimes elude us.

Case in point, this fine example of paranoically unhinged idiocy, courtesy of one of the more disturbed MAGAts that I’ve had the unsettling displeasure of coming across in recent years, the uniquely opinionated, if not needing to be forcibly future medicated, Debbie Nowicki Harshbarger of Pocono Summit, PA:

She seems… what’s the classification that’s 180 degrees due South of “sane”?

Oh, that’s right- she sounds as rational as they type of person who not only proudly beasts about owning Nickelback’s musical catalogue entire, but the Director’s “Renegade” cut of “Highlander 2: The Quickening”, as well. I’ve referenced Debbie in other screeds, but as time goes on, I’ve come to release with no small amount of joy, that her gift for proving herself to be an absolute fucking marron regardless of topic involved, is seemingly inexhaustible.

So Debbie, “Satan”, a mythical construct & scapegoat of ultimate convenience, is a true-blue Democrat, you say? Well, let’s take a look at the political stats underpinning your comparison, and just to make it interestingly accurate, we’ll use “God’s” own words [another myth of convenience] regarding some current social concerns and I’ll do so straight from the book that you so obviously use far more as your go-to beer coaster, rather than as your spiritual guide.

And in order to draw the parallels twixt the two, I’ll place “God’s” words right next to the ones openly and publicly uttered by the leadership of the GQP. And don’t worry Debbie, for as your party is all about following the Word unquestionably, I’m sure their responses to the situations I will present, will be indistinguishable from those commanded by “Him”. In fact, I’m almost 100% certain of it. How about you?

Oh… really? Well, let’s just roll the dice and see what happens, anyway.

ON HELPING THE POOR:

God: “For there will never cease to be poor in the land. Therefore I command you, “You shall open wide your hand to your brother, to the needy and to the poor, in your land.”- Deuteronomy 15:11

GQP: “I think not having the estate tax recognizes the people that are investing as opposed to those that are just spending every darn penny they have, whether it’s on booze or women or movies,” – Sen Chuck Grassley, whose personal net worth is 15M, and who not only receives a monthly income of 70K, but the additional perks of free healthcare, reimbursement of his personal travel, and the comfort of a federal pension to count on when he retires, as well.

ON IMMIGRATION:

God: “And if a stranger sojourn with thee in your land, ye shall not vex him. But the stranger that dwelleth with you shall be unto you as one born among you, and thou shalt love him as thyself; for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God.” -Leviticus 19:33-34

GQP: “I would ask you to go back through history and figure out where are these contributions that have been made by these other categories of people that you are talking about, where did any other subgroup of people contribute more to civilization? “- Iowa Rep. Steve King

King’s comment is so asinine in o both its scope and its ignorance, that it only serves to certify yet again, as to just why when you played “astronaut” as a kid, your mom made certain that the bread-bag space helmet she made for you had multiple air-holes poked in it first.

ON TRANSGENDERISM:

God: Not ONE fucking word. At all. You know why? Because despite being a myth, he’s an icon of acceptance.

GQP: “For the good of society, transgenderism must be eradicated from public life entirely — the whole preposterous ideology, at every level.” – Daily Wire host, Michael Knowles

Yup… “eradicated”. He said that, and then stood behind it. But it’s not like he called for an allegorical genocide of Transfolk, or anything along those lines, because according to Knowles, and I quote directly; “Nobody is calling to exterminate anybody, because the other problem with that statement is that transgender people is not a real ontological category- it’s not a legitimate category of being,”

Oh well that clears that vile remark up completely, does it not? Even if Knowle’s anti-Trans rhetoric echoes Hitler’s rationalization of the Holocaust, wherein he opined that the Jews as being a “race-tuberculosis of the peoples”, I’m sure that no one out there within the lands of the radicalized MAGA collective, would interpret these inflammatory remarks as being a call for action, whatsoever.

Because… um… reasons, and stuff.

ON GUN VIOLENCE:
(Ok, I do know that guns weren’t a thing back in Gid’s supposed day, but he did (allegedly) say a thing or two about the act of violence, so that will be our frame of reference for the following commentary..)

God: “Violence shall no more be heard in thy land, wasting nor destruction within thy borders; but thou shalt call thy walls Salvation, and thy gates Praise.” – Isaiah 60:18

GQP: “If you want to legislate evil, it’s just not going to happen. We need a real revival in this country. Let’s call on our Christian ministers and our people of faith. If you think Washington is going to fix this problem, you’re wrong. They’re not going to fix this problem. They are the problem.” -Tennessee Rep. Tim Burchett

I’d point out that 99% of what Burchett said above is demonstrability false, and the statistics prove it. Gun control DOES work, and as an elected legislator, Burchett is well aware of this reality. But he did get one thing right: Washington, where he works supposedly on the behalf of the American people, won’t fix the issue. After all, those “donations” [AKA: legalized bribes] from both the gun lobby as well as the NRA, won’t keep pouring in half as well as they so freely do now, unless he sees to that.

And despite his reluctance to stop or at the very least, curb school shootings, Burchett does care about your kid’s safety just as much as he cares for the safety of his own daughter. That’s why she’s classified as a home-schooled student, and your kid is still considered an acceptable cost of doing business.

But in the end, the only thing that truly counts when aligning the Conservative movement with the purity of God’s decrees, are the inherent principles such a position of strength would most certainly demand. So, how does the GQP fare in regards to achieving that, you ask? Once again, we go to the Good Book.

ON MORALITY:

God: “Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law. For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” – Romans 13:8-9

GQP: “Trump’s indictment is the culmination of 6 years of the Democrats weaponizing law enforcement to target and persecute their political enemies. Dictatorships operate like this – the US is supposed to be different,” – Senator Ted Cruz

This disingenuous statement, delivered by the same cringingly spineless cur that let Trump brazenly slur his father and the mother of his children, is pure GQP gold. So, the veracity of his cozying up to dictators, bragging about sexually assaulting women, using the power of the WH to enrich both himself and his family, all while issuing threats based in misogyny, racism, egotism, incompetence, and fascism, are 100% cool, but let’s make sure not to hold him accountable for it, because of… um… undeserved prosecution?

Geez Ted. How do you manage to swallow that much mango-tinted dick, and yet still talk?

Damn, if this doesn’t paint the GQP as the party of the splendidly virtuous, I have no idea what possibly could do so. And that’s without my even mentioning just how many of its members in just the last three alone, have gone down for their participation in not only the events of J6, but the multiple acts of sex trafficking, child-porn distribution, adultery, political corruption, sexual harassment, pedophilia, as well as the ever-continuing threats of ideologically-inspired partisan violence to boot,

Now for the record, I am not a Christian. But then again, given the behavioral evidence above, neither are the majority of its so-called adherents to the Faith, either. And while I may not be one of this allegorical flock myself, I can read at least, and it seems to me that after my perusing of the tome that is supposedly the principled primer for being a “good” person, Jesus was by all accounts, the most woke person ever.

I mean… the man / Messiah / myth LITERALLY rose from the evermore of his eternal slumber to continue doing both good works and inspire others, which is far more in line with current Liberal ideology, than that of the treason-supporting, corruption and adultery ignoring, child-abusing, hate-and-fear-mongering, insipidly hypocritical modern-day Conservative movement. But yes, Debbie…”Satan” is definitely a Democrat.

But whereas the compendium of Bronze-Age fairy-tales fails, reality, or at least Harshbarger’s wholly batshit and erroneously paranoid interpretation of it, prevails nevertheless:

Well, that’s quite the boatload of serious accusations that the ol’ Debster has assembled there using only the ever-screaming voices in her head, but even still, and in all fairness, we should probably address it post haste. To note Debbie, the Democrats are not a “Hate Group”, unless of course you consider being vehemently displeased with systematic racism, misogyny, social inequality, and LGBTQ-phobic behaviors as an ethical lapse, which when given your inane ideology, you most certainly do.

But let’s dissect this Trumpanzee tripe anyway, if only for our own sense of fun. So, the Democratic party “attracts” in your own nonsensical words, the following undesirable elements:

Poor people who hate Rich people: Strange that being forced to pay the voluminous tax void left behind by the ultra-rich 1%, while not being able to afford the most basic of necessities, would make a financially-strapped demographic somewhat bitter, huh? But hey GQP, just keep pitching those tax breaks for everyone save the people that actually need it. I’m sure that will smooth the situation over in no time.

Black people who hate White people: Now, why would African-Americans have any sort of issue with Whites, I wonder? I mean, besides the systemic racism inherent to successfully providing equitable justice, financial, voting, representational, educational, and career opportunities that is, but other than that, I can’t think of a single thing in verified American History, that would denote us as being the bad guys.

And rest assured, if there is something to be found, I’m sure its soundtrack just had to be written by Nickelback, because that’s only reason I can think of for justifying the hate of my fellow Vanillarians.

Gay people who hate straight people: Gee Debbie, do you think that the reason for this just might be the influx of “Don’t say Gay” legislation, the vehemence of the anti-Gay marriage movement, the anti-Drag Queen legislation, the banning of Gay-themed books from schools and libraries, or the slanderous and unfounded slurs depicting the LGBTQ Community at large, as being nothing less than predatory pedophiles and sexual deviants?  Nah, that couldn’t be it, could it?

Nope. It must have something to do with the music of Nickelback, yet again.

Feminists who hate Men: Now, why would Women have any sort of issue with Men, I wonder? I mean, besides the systemic misogyny regarding their attire, equitable career compensation, individual decision to have (or not have) children, or in how society dismissively treats the traumatized victims of sexual assault and harassment enacted upon them by same said men, that is?

But then again, I’m confident that a political party that deliberately stripped these unjustifiably angry women of their personal body autonomy while leaving the sanctity of Men’s untouched, and who’ve openly espoused wanting to reelect a self-admitted sexual predator back into the White House, are all about protecting women’s rights, when all is said and tabulated.

Environmentalists who hate the internal combustion engine: Even by the already unfathomable depths of GQP density, this is truly stupider than fuck. Weird that on the ONLY INHABITABLE PLANET THAT WE HAVE AT OUR DISPOSAL, there could exist a group of people who might think that not destroying it for the sake of personal convenience or short-term profit, might be an idea worth exploring for the long-term.

I get it Debbie. You as usual, need boogeymen to obsess over, and it’s clearly obvious. But people fighting to keep your air breathable and your water drinkable, were your first go-to pick? Normally, I’d wait for the randomness of you, a plugged-in toaster, and a running bathtub to solve the issue of your latent ignorance for me, but in this case, I have a far quicker solution that will benefit us both.

Simply go into your garage, seal the door with Flex-Tape, turn on your car to full blast, and deeply breathe in the intellect-enhancing fumes it emanates, until you’ve either successfully owned the Libs, or have overcome the primarily pesky hurdle to becoming one of Satan’s brides.

Man, I truly have no idea what Debbie’s particular mental deficiency is, but I’d lay dollars to doughnuts that it’s probably very hard to pronounce. But on the upside, one day it’s going to keep a team of court-ordered psychiatrists gainfully employed got quite some time. Moving on…

A lot of bratty college kids that hate their parents: Um, Debbie? All kids hate their parents when they’re in college. All of them. Throughout the history of Time itself. I do love however, that you vow the college-educated as a threat, when it’s taken into consideration that you’re too goddamn stupid to open the doors granting you access into the lobby of one.

Honestly Debbie, when I first saw your density slithering across my social media feeds, I was hoping for a battle of wits, but in all due fairness you appear to be unarmed, and as I pride myself on knowing that I can’t metaphorically kick someone who is as intellectually sharp as a marble and still feel good about myself in the morning, I’ll just let the inanity of this asinine comment slide on by for a change.

Nevertheless, the true gem to be discovered within Harshbarger’s rant is the assertion that it’s the “Media” that convinces people to vote for Democrats, rather than the policies of such, which unlike the GQP’s current and future offerings, aren’t based in the mongering of hate and fear. Weird that when you offer people a clear choice between enlightened acceptance versus enlightened acceptance, they tend to lean towards the latter, huh?

But you are right about one thing- our journalists do try to encourage you to vote Democrat, because unlike your fallen stars of media manipulation who find themselves unemployed after costing their employers three-quarters of a billion dollars for lying about non-existent voter fraud, our side doesn’t focus on masturbatory fever-dream bullshit like this:

Yes, once again Debster, the problems within this country’s current incarnation are so the fault of the Democrats, right? But I’m sure your party’s refusal to do anything to help the average American as they ban books, drag queens, gay marriage, minority voting, early voting, by mail voting, women’s personal body autonomy, and the ability to earn a living wage, will clear all of these issues right up.

But Harshbarger here, isn’t the subject of today’s literary musings, despite the fact that down the road. I will most certainly be undertaking a far more entertaining and in-depth dissection of her idiotic as fuck mental ramblings. No, she’s simply the opening act for the true star of my allegorical assembly of the asinine, the thrice-covered Gerry Catinari of Sacramento, CA.

In previous screeds, I’ve covered Catinari’s disturbingly ignorant takes on everything he regards paranoically under the sun, but in today’s hopefully final facet of his story-arc, I’m going to be focused primarily on his political observations, which to be fair are just as fearfully misinformed and bordering in the insane, as everything else that he’s cluelessly blathered on about thus far.

Catinari at his best, is a cornucopia stuffed chock-full of Caucasian cravenness, and at his worst, he’s the best standing argument for reengaging in the practice of Eugenics that I have ever seen in my life. For those of you unfamiliar with what Eugenics is, here’s the generally accepted definitive:

“The study of how to arrange reproduction within a human population to increase the occurrence of heritable characteristics regarded as desirable. Developed largely by Sir Francis Galton as a method of improving the human race, eugenics was increasingly discredited as unscientific and racially biased during the 20th century, especially after the adoption of its doctrines by the Nazis in order to justify their treatment of Jews, disabled people, and other minority groups.”

Now, in no way, shape, or quantifiable form, am I suggesting that we as a society, collectively reinvest in the undertaking of applying such an abominable course of action upon our citizenry at large, because to be fair, the question of who gets to determine the righteous, and who gets to not be designated as such, would result in an ethical conundrum that could in eventual consequence, find this country stranding before the International Criminal Court in the Hague, as a defendant.

Regardless, I would also maintain that when someone comes along who proves to us all without a doubt that their end of the gene pool is both rationally shallow and desperately in need of chlorine, maybe we should at the very least, apply some concentrated effort towards keeping their particular DNA strand from replicating itself any further than it already unfortunately has. 

Mind you, I’m not suggesting forced sterilization, so much as I am forced incarceration in a library until they can prove that not only have they gotten definitively smarter, but that they in tandem, also give a genuine damn about their fellow humans as well, irrespective of the societal demographics involved.

Why do I say this, you ask?

Well, if it hasn’t become blatantly obvious by now over the course of my three previous screeds concerning his publicly posted bigotry, racism, misogyny, codependency on inane conspiracies, and anti-LGBTQ rhetoric, Catinari is the quintessential walking definition of everything that you’d expect a fucking idiot to be.  And in a turn that’s even sadder, he can’t seem to stop himself from being obsessively so.

Take for instance, this prime example of cluelessness, posted right after the disastrous 2023 midterms, where the GQP’s overconfident predictions of a “Red Wave” turned out to be nothing more than a pink drip:

Weird is it not, that running a failed TV snake-oil salesman and a conspiracy-pushing loon framed in perpetual soft focus as key sate candidates, didn’t yield the result you were hoping for, when the metaphorical dust has settled. A mystery of the Age, I guess.

After all, Trump had all of those desirable characteristics when he slithered into American politics, and he somehow managed to still get it over the line.

I guess running one-trick ponies as so-called viable contenders, when their trick is already widely known if not despised, isn’t the surefire thing it once was.  a correction to this, I’d normally suggest that you could actually offer up some non-insane entrants, but you and I already know that your party happily cast aside those moderates in favor of the brain-dead cultists you now have, quite some time ago.

I guess running one-trick ponies as so-called viable contenders, when their trick is already widely known if not despised, isn’t the surefire thing it once was.  a correction to this, I’d normally suggest that you could actually offer up some non-insane intrants, but you and I already know that your party happily cast aside those moderates in favor of the brain-dead cultists you now have, quite some time ago.

Here’s the deal, if your guy is a proven liar, coin-man, adulterer, traitor, coward, and you still support him with pride, you don’t really have the right to lecture others regarding any topic related to either governance or the rules of society in general. And you most certainly, don’t get to claim the higher moral ground, like this hypocritical posting of supreme self-ownership blatantly attempts to do:

Sigh. As you can see, Catinari’s gift for reposting that which is erroneous is on full display, and is its way, it once again bites him squarely on the undersexed Vienna sausage that he ever so optimistically, calls his dick.

To note, the character flaws that Trump openly displays as if they were attributes, are the same qualities that in a Democrat candidate, would cause the GQP to prepare their torches and pitchforks for a midnight march upon the proverbial castle, but when it’s their guy committing the transgression, it’s a “no big whoop, thank you very much”, kind of reaction,

Hypocrisy may not necessarily be a Conservative value, but they still present it far better than anyone else. But since we’re all here, let me just shred some of the “points” that this mentally-meandering message posted by a moron, so definitively does not make, if only for the joy of punching yet another hole in the floor of Catinari’s dimwitted dinghy.

To start, the originator of this garbage masquerading as commentary, did not “vote” for the 2A, the next Supreme Court justice, the Electoral College, or the Republic we all live in, for those particulars are all fairly well-inoculated from his direct input. No, our friend here voted for the singular demagogues whose abominable biases and lack of concern for their fellow citizen, mirrored and appealed to his sense of hatred the most, and that’s it in a nutshell.

For as he noted, “I voted for the Platform”, and the only one that the GQP has offered the American people since the decline of their party began with the inclusion of all things Trumpian, is the one that they wish to hang drag queens, Transpeople, Women, Gays, Minorities, and the highly educated from.

Oh, who am I kidding? They don’t need a platform, so long as they still have access to trees:

The GQP, everyone. Reminding us all, just exactly why the modern-day Neo-Nazi movement overwhelmingly votes for them, and not for us tree-hugging, anti-hanging, bleeding-heart Libtards.

Sure, I guess we could craft pinatas made out of humans as they are a renewable resource, but to be fair, who has a far more established track record for doing so, and then successfully getting away with it? I can only guess when they say that “the South will rise again”, they’re obviously referencing the problematic level of its ongoing inbreeding, and not the non-existent IQ of its collective legislators.

That disgusting reality aside, let’s take a look at the rest of this jackass manifesto, and see just what else contained within its asinine boundaries, is fantastical unadulterated horseshit. And for the ease of any non-Alt-Wrong readers, I’ll translate it all into “MAGA speak”, as a public service.

“I’m voting for the Police and Law and Order”.

MAGA TRANSLATION:

“Unless of course, it or “they”, dare come after our mango Mussolini man-child for his numerous acts of campaign fraud, treason, or unabashed theft of classified documents. And in relation to the cops that protected the nation’s Capitol, when all we were trying to do was overthrow the results of a fair election based on proven lies, right after we attempted to hang the Vice-President? The nerve!”

“I’m voting for the Military and the veterans…”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Therefore, I’m supporting the party that cuts their benefits, offers them false praise while doing nothing to live up to it, and does so as they worship a draft-dodging, war widow and Gold Star family insulting coward, who not only paid his way off of the draft register, but also claimed that it was his nonexistent bone spurs that were at fault for his 4F status. An affliction that when he was questioned about, he couldn’t remember with any sense of actual detail, but oh well… I’m sure that it was all legit.”

”I’m voting for the Flag that is always missing…”

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Actually, I know it’s not, and that this is a stupid-as-fuck thing to say, given the fact that it’s been debunked several times, but Tucker said it was 100% true, so I’m running with that.”

“I’m voting for the right to speak my opinion and not be censored”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Hi there! Despite claiming to be a “Constitutionalist”, I still don’t understand that a private business (such as social media platforms) isn’t governed by the First Amendment, and I’m very upset that mu racism, misogyny, xenophobia, and anti-LGBTQ rhetoric is getting called out.”

“I’m voting for secure borders”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “That’s why I’ll be voting for the guy that hired illegal aliens to work at his resorts.”

“I’m voting for the right to praise my God without fear”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Despite the fact that I claim to be a Christian, I don’t actually follow his decrees,  live his Word, or place any sincere stock in the promise of Isaiah 54:17, which states that; “No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.”

“I’m voting for every unborn soul”….

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Hence the reason why I support the party that took away the body autonomy of only one gender, so that later on, I can demonize single mothers as being irresponsible whores and the worst of societal parasites, thereby justifying my political brethren obliterating the social aid programs that assist them.”

“I’m voting for freedom and the American Dream”

MAGA TRANSLATION: “Offer applies to White males only. All others need not apply.”

“I’m voting for Good and against Evil”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “And by that, I mean the absolute reverse, as it’s only my party that’s attacking the LGBTQ Community, minorities, women, free speech, personal healthcare choices, and of all things, motherfuckin’ Disneyland. All while banning books, defunding public libraries, spreading slander about teachers, scientists, and journalists, as they attempt to replace Democracy with an Americanized variant of fascism, but I digress.”.

“I’m not just voting for one person…”

MAGA TRANSLATION: “OK, I admit it… I actually am. And trust me, he’s so not worth it. But he does say all the hateful things that I want to say without suffering any notable consequence, and God, do I love him for it, even if he would cheerfully unplug my life support so that he could charge up his I-phone.”

“I’m voting for the future of my country!”.

MAGA TRANSLATION: “I’m voting to keep “my” America as clueless and vanilla as a Norman Rockwell calendar, and if that fails, I’ll just threaten the safety of my fellow Americans with random acts of stochastic terrorism. Because as you well know, that’s what true lovers of personal freedom do.”

However, once Catinari remoras onto a theme that makes his side look like the good guys, despite all verified evidence to the contrary, he’s loath to let it go. As you’ve come to expect, Catinari willingly provides an example of this “we’re the true heroes here” self-owning hypocrisy, and as you’d also expect, he misses the irony of his own stupidity, being proven by no less than his own hand.   

Something that I was more than happy to call attention to:

So, let me get this straight, if I may. And if I can, let me share the following observation that I’ve made.

The political party currently banning books of all kinds, eliminating minority-based cultural studies from grade schools as well as college campuses, and who stripped away women’s personal body autonomy, all while repeatedly calling for the Free Press to be chilled, as they utter consistent demands that their opponents be locked up for crimes both imaginary and farcical, believe that they’re the ones on the “right side of History”?

Interesting. Especially if you’re a devotee of real History, and not the whitewash that Conservatives willingly guzzle as if it was the very essence of a Manna milkshake. Generally, when the one side doing all of that I listed above, does so in the face of all verified reality while claiming that it’s the other side who are the true villains, it’s literally the clearest confession of guilt that the actually righteous could ever hope for.

And Catinari’s consistent use of a cartoon character whose well-established ethos is 180 digress opposite of his asinine one, is possibly one the surest indicators that his regurgitated view of actualized realty is just as warped as his intellect. This is not to say that overall, Catinari is stupid. Far from it, in fact., It just seems that when it comes to thinking logically, he appears to be having a rather hard go of it.

Inadvertently, Catinari’s consistent use of a cartoon character whose well-established ethos is 180 digress opposite of his asinine one, is possibly one the surest indicators that his regurgitated view of actualized realty is just as warped as his intellect. This is not to say that overall, Catinari is stupid. Far from it, in fact., It just seems that when it comes to thinking logically, he appears to be having a rather hard go of it.

And yes, there’s yet another example of that mental defect to be found, despite his efforts to sound smart:

Here’s a fun stupid human trick that you can do, and the best part is that its costs absolutely nothing: find a MAGAt, any MAGAt, and ask them; “When was America “Great”, and why was that?”, and then enjoy watching how they attempt to dance around the issues of indigenous genocide, slavery, racism, misogyny, as well as the xenophobia and anti-LGBTQ sentiment interwoven historically throughout America’s dark legacy.

Seriously. It’s better than an entire case of bubble-wrap being handed to you, but the sound of the air escaping as they try to defend the slogan that was adapted from the KKK of the 1920’s, is exactly the same. However, further additional joy can be gleaned from the new revamped MAGA credo, which is, and I swear to mythical God that I am not making this up; “Make America Great and Glorious Again”, or “MAGAGA“, for short. 

An acronym that sounds like either a baby being strangled to death by a fellow toddler, or the name of a bizarre Japanese sexual practice one would only discover the meaning of betwixt the sticky pages of a tentacle porn magazine.

Maybe it’s just me, but has anyone else noticed just how much Neocons such as Catinari rely on labels to make sense of the world that they don’t understand? And just how often they present their assignations devoid of the crucial context that would invalidate them?

Well, this seems like a fun game! Let me try a few of my own, if such a thing is permissible. And I promise, I’ll be just as thoughtfully intellectual as Catinari is attempting to be here.

Let’s start with this “Christian”, who posted this vile insipidness on the day of a mass shooting:

Now, let’s try “Sane”:

Followed up by “Honest”:

Naturally, we need to discuss the “Patriots”:And we’ll finish up with my personal favorite, the “Really, really smart” “Stable genius”:

But let’s not forget Conservatives favorite designation and ploy, “Victimhood”: a gambit so well worn out and unsubstantiated at this point in the political arena, it’s akin to my griping about how hard it is to find a good VCR repair shop these days.

Neocons LOVE playing the victim, especially when it can be used as a (limited, mind you) defense against being called out for their own definable actions, both abominable if not numerous.Note that they say (and do) racist things, they’ll say you’re attacking “White Culture” in all of its mayonnaise-soaked glory. Observe that they’re religious hypocrites, and they’ll accuse you of being a Satanist, as if they actually know what one of those is.

Suggest that the poor, our veterans, and the most disadvantaged among us deserve help, while the 1% should pay their fair share? Well, you can just get the fuck out of here, and take your Communist / Socialist / Woke bullshit with you, as you go.

Defend the LGBTQ Community from the scourge of GQP discrimination and violent threats, then sit back and wait to be slandered as either a groomer or a pedophile, irrespective of the fact that their party is literally top-heavy with persons fitting both descriptives. And if you dare advocate that Women should have the inherent right to control their own personal healthcare decisions?

That sounds like stereotypical cuck-soy-boy-bottom-humper propaganda, so far as they’re concerned. And no matter what validated realty says or proves, rest assured that the entire world is allied against them, which should cause them to set aside a moment for personal reflection, but usually doesn’t. And let me tell you, what they think actually sets off the Libs is hilarious, because in their view, it’s quite literally everything under the sun, no matter how insignificant or pointless.

A prime example:

OMFG, AM I EVER SO MAD THAT PATRIOTS ARE SNAGGING THIS SHIRT, and I’m… um… not, I guess? What exactly are us Libbers supposed to be “seething” about, exactly? The fact that once again, MAGAts have seemingly self-identified as being useful idiots for our convenience alone? In essence, it basically tells me who shouldn’t be allowed to handle anything sharp, flammable, fragile, stabby, explosive, or possibly maiming, within the boundaries of my immediate physical presence.

And most certainly, it does help me custom tailor my party invite and Christmas card list, as well. Hey, I can quite easily be the bigger person here and thank them for doing that, as its actually quite the genuinely thoughtful gesture on their part, for once. And here I was, thinking that these morons had a limited usefulness to our society, past being a cautionary tale concerning inbreeding with a urinal cake, that is.

Regardless of whether Neocons are posting false “Facebook banned this flag picture” memes, or a never-ending onslaught of debunked statistics, culture war conspiracies, scientific misinterpretation, or political claptrap, the one cry that binds all of it together in its mewling mendacity, is the rallying clarion that;

Say what you want about Hitler, and you should, but the modern-day Conservative movement has obviously been taking some detailed notes, and putting them to nefarious use. I guess that the old adage of “You learn something new every day” is true, despite its evidential source being unable to learn anything at any time.

In fact, an excellent specimen of this theorem is served up by Catinari yet again, in the form of a meme featuring conservative “commentator” (idiot) Kelly Sadler, and its message is a true corker of cravenly hypocritical unawareness in its purest distillation:

Remember what I said earlier about everything the GQP says being either projection or confession? Well, here it’s both. Sadler’s comment that it isn’t up to conservatives to “repair the norms”, is pure GQP misdirection at its fullest and finest, given the undeniable fact that it was her party alone that not only sadistically shattered the said norms, but indulged in gang-raping them as they gleefully did so.

Remind me again if you would, just which political partisanship openly praised dictators, slurred minorities as criminals, women standing up for their rights as feminazi’s, the LGBTQ Community as sexually perverted deviants, and who attempted and fortunately failed to violently overturn the tabulated results of a free and fair election?

Go ahead… I’ll wait.

And while I do, I’ll contemplate as to why it is that Catinari, a man who claims to know all about that which is political, has ostensibly “no idea” who Sadler actually is, despite having the informational archives of the World Wide Web at his intellectually-challenged fingertips. For the record, Sadler is the current Commentary Editor and a columnist for The Washington Times, as well as being a regular contributor [AKA: “Liar”] to the wannabe FOX clone that is Newsmax.

She also posts genuinely asinine self-owning bon-mots such as these, along with the usual fear-mongering red meat toss, via the Internet’s closest analog to what the demographic of Darwin’s waiting room would look like:

Yeah, pointing out the reality that the Democrats tackle the issues head-on that your side won’t even condescend to pretend that they even exist, isn’t the strong flex that you believe it to be. Just sayin’.
For the life of me, I cannot even fathom why your side gets so consistently slandered as being full of moronic louts who get hard at the mere thought of political violence. Truly, a mystery for the ages.

This assessment, presented to us all by a disingenuously hateful Stepford wench who gets paid to sell out her gender as well as her country, but I digress if only for the sake of modern-day chivalry.Um, lady? One of your possible Presidential contenders is currently waging a cultural war against a cartoon mouse, so maybe your dumb as fuck detestable ass, should just sit this one out.

Yet once more, pointing out the consequential fallout from your mango-man-child’s numerous illegal actions, really isn’t the end-all be-all power-play that you believe it to be. But on the upside, thanks for listing just a few of the several reasons as to why nobody with a conscience or a working soul, should ever vote for him.

And did I mention the one last thing that makes me laugh at Catinari’s assertion that he doesn’t know who Sadler actually is? Well, as it just so happens to be, Sadler’s other non-important, low-key, and hardly worth-mentioning job at one point, was serving as Director of Surrogates and Coalition, where she was responsible for compiling and distributing talking points to allies of the administration.

I know, I know. Due to her job title, I thought that it involved recruiting the next-in-line mistress for Trump, as well.

Sadler was forced to resign however, after it was learned that during a communication meeting at the WH, she joked that the now late John Mc Cain’s opposition to Gina Haspel being nominated as CIA director didn’t matter, because he was, and I quote; “dying anyway.” You know, like the social norms set by the GQP demand that you do in such a situation?

I have to hand it to Catinari once more: just as he does when he’s seeking cultural guidance when the man goes in search of role models to emulate, he’s certainly not afraid to go all the way down to the bottom of the barrel itself. Even if it does mean that he’ll then be shoveling another ten feet underneath it, to find the moral icons that he draws most of his ideology from.

Nevertheless, Sadler did mention the following of agendas, and in the case of the American Taliban that she is so willingly a complicit member of, such direction applies to almost every facet of modern-day life, regardless of the realty that the citizens of America overall, consistently reject the one presented so odiously by the GQP in both its entirety and its message.

When it gets right down to the brass tacks of the matter, the GQP is overly staffed, supported, and pathetically guided towards its own self-caused eventual demise, by no less than the absolute fucking lowest caliber of pridefully hypocritical idiots that only the aberrations of nature can so abundantly provide.

Speaking of which, one of the Alt-Wrong’s favorite serendipitous stalwarts, is the dog whistle non-issue of conservative voices being censored, even though numerous studies [as noted in earlier screeds] have proven that the very idea of such, is pure unadulterated bullshit. But such evidential trifles won’t stop Catinari asserting the opposite, as he lauds the GQP’s top-notch inadvertent walking punchline:

The Representative for Colorado’s Third Congressional District, U.S. Congresswoman Lauren Boebert, everyone.

A hypocritically unintelligent conspiracy-spouting anti-vaxxer, a virulently awful Pro-2A proponent, a callous Pro-Lifer married to a registered sex offender, who just became a grandmother in her mid-30’s, because one of her equally as dumb children, knocked up another equally as dumb child, having a meltdown regarding Free Speech protection directed at the execs of Twitter, which in no way, shape or form, is governed by such.

To note, the First Amendment says this, and ONLY this: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

Read that again, if you must. No mention of Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, or any of the myriad of interactive social media platforms that have existed in the past, and/or currently exist now. NOT A SINGLE FUCKING MENTION OF ANY OF THEM.

You know why? Because they’re (deep breath) private fucking enterprises whose users are subject to the policies and rules set forth by same said entities, which have all been PREVIOUSLY AGREED TO BY SAID USERS, and therefore, are technically immune from any such governmental oversight, no matter what this guntard grandma-to-be, screams to the darkening sky.

Now, you would think that a duly (if sadly) elected congressperson would already know this to be true, and let me assure you that Boebert most definitively does, but in her exceedingly limited defense, you can’t raise those crucial campaign kickbacks from your asinine cultist base, until you publicly slaughter a slew of already dead cows, now can you?

And may I just say, that for people who are allegedly being “silenced” they sure seem to be pretty loud, if not highly visible on social media, in regards to their imaginary non-issue.

But mythical God love him, since no else with a brain will, Catinari just can’t stop posting the most crystalline examples of self-owning GQP lunacy. Such as say… something to do with unfounded anti-vaxxing propaganda being “censored” for the good of the nation’s public health and well-being:

Mace here, is a truly unique GQP member. She has openly criticized her fellow Neocons such as Marjorie Taylor Greene in particular, stating that; “The embrace of QAnon, conspiracy theories, or any other extreme, racist, bigoted, or violent views will always get a forceful condemnation from me.”

Now I will give credit where credit is due, and given the venomous nature of today’s “Big Lie” promoting GQP leadership, that’s also a ballsy position to take. However?

Despite saying; “Leadership means doing the right thing, even against your own party”, when she was faced with Trump proudly endorsing her primary opponent Katie Arrington, while branding Mace as being “disloyal”, she flip-flopped, and pathetically posted a video of herself gushing over Trump, as she stood in front of Trump Tower NYC, saying; “He brought American jobs back, he lowered our taxes, wages and employment were better for every hard-working American, He made America safer.”

But as is my way, I had further commentary to add to this, yet another one of Catinari’s cringe-inducing posts:

Keep in mind, that despite gun violence being the number one killer of children in our country, despite the issue of societally crippling race-based disparities, despite the fact that women are being essentially and brutally penalized for just being existent women, and that the average American is barely treading the shark-laden financial waters of our capitalistic economy, the GQP’s main priorities are irrespective of what Americans are demanding of them.

Instead, they’re harassing, demonizing and attempting to criminalize, the LGBTQ Community, banning books, defunding public libraries, slashing public health and social aid measures, and as always, stoking the fires of unfettered fear about the supposed danger of the [insert convenient scapegoat here], while purposefully making sure that child marriage remains legal in far too many states.

And no, I am not making that abominable reality up, or being disingenuously hyperbolic about it, either:

West Virginia’s official state motto BTW, is “Montani Semper Liberi”, which translates to the rather revealing axiom that “Mountaineers Are Always Free”. Just how free, you ask?

Well, under the auspices of a law signed by the ironically named Governor Jim Justice, who just so happens (naturally) to be a Republican, children as young as 16 can get married, but only with specific restrictions imposed. These so-called limitations include getting parental consent first, along with a preclusion that they can’t marry someone more than four years older than them.

This, I’m sure, doesn’t turn your stomach at all, because in all honestly, what’s more natural than a college sophomore having relations with one that’s still attending high school? And these alleged people boys and girls, are the role models that Catinari takes his political leanings from? How comforting.

But such are the whims of life, are they not? Nevertheless, and in spite of the abundant archive that Catinari pulls his inanity from, he’s still one of my fellow Americans, and a proud one at that. Granted, he’s also one of the worst representations of what such is supposed to be, but due to hie inability to absorb and then correctly process reality, I guess I can only assign a limited amount of blame to his ideology.

The obvious culprit here is possibly Catinarl’s family tree, whose lineage I can only assume, resembles that of a bottle garden. Irrespective of this though, is that when it gets right down to it, Catinari knows what protects both his abominable philosophy and the one that I carry, which is based on being an actual human, and not a hatefully ignorant land-slug. So, wherein does this protection stem from? Catinari knows:

This warning, brought to you not only by a person who supports the party currently using the Constitution as an allegorical masturbation sock, but also a person who has zero issue with the vile events that took place in regards to J6, as well. But to be fair, Catinari does believe in the founding documents at least, and even I have to applaud that, despite his thinking that it only applies to his ideological side alone.

Shame then, given his faith in one of our nation’s most sacrosanct documents, that his party’s de facto leader views it as being far less relevant than Catinari does. In fact, he even publicly stated as much:

For the record, if the 2020 election had indeed been “stolen”, as the World’s Angriest Creamsicle falsely suggests whenever possible, then the only recourse for such, would be to have yet another election, one which due to such a historic fraud occurring, would be triple-checked for accuracy.

But as Trump is known to be nothing less than a sociopathic liar and con-man, rest assured that such a theoretical is not even worth considering.  And that’s not just my opinion, that’s the end ruling of SIXTY-FOUR separate legal challenges that Trump lost when he, time and time again, failed to produce any of the so-called evidence proving fraud that to this day, he still claims to have, but still won’t publicly produce.

Because of… um… [INSERT GQP-APPROVED BULLSHIT EXCUSE HERE], I guess? So, Catinari ever the staunch Constructionist, is perfectly A-OK with Trump suggesting that the big “C” gets tossed out, but if one dare suggest that perhaps the 1% pay their fair share of taxes, or that the LGBTQ Community has the same civil and societal rights as he does, then America is going straight to the bowels of Hell itself.

We got it, Gerry. You’re a fucking idiot, and that’s never going to change.

By the way, does Catinari also know what the Founding Daddies would also not want? A mango-tinted dumbfuck wannabe fascist, scheming in league with a corrupt political party full of seditious cowards, to unweave the very fabric of the once grand republic that they fought so hard to create. And more specifically, not one who after attempting to usurp democracy, had the cojones to claim this as well:

Trump, ever the congenital liar if not an unabashed egomaniac, claimed during a speech that the “famous pollster John McLaughlin” told him just before the C19 pandemic, (whose response Trump so incompetently mangled), that “if George Washington and Abraham Lincoln came back from the dead”, and formed a dual political ticket, that Trump would “beat them by 40 percent”.

Quick question? Are they zombies? Because that seems like it would be a hindrance to the marketing of their campaign to the average American, what with the need for fresh brains and all that. Just sayin’.

Carrying on with this blatant falsehood, our homegrown Mango Mussolini stated that; “The numbers were numbers that nobody could even believe,” You’re actually correct for once, my mango-man-child: nobody does believe this, as its pure horseshit served up on a slab of worm-infested red meat. You’re actually correct for once, my mango-man-child: nobody does believe this, as its pure horseshit served up on a slab of worm-infested red meat.

Unsurprisingly, Trump has no obvious clue about actual American history, and his blatant lie is so goddamn egregious beyond all rational belief, that even the ghost of Joseph Goebbels found itself taken aback by the hubris of its narcissistic audacity.

But as his nature, Trump just had to embellish what was an already unbelievable tale with a gilded layer of masturbatory ego-icing: “That’s how good our numbers were. I’ll never forget that because that would be a tough tandem, George Washington and Abraham Lincoln… ‘Ladies and gentlemen, George Washington and Abraham Lincoln have announced that they will be running for president and vice president.’ I would say, ‘Oh man, that’s tough, that’s a tough one.’”

Interestingly, while Lincoln is known to have been a determined Republican, Washington never allied himself with any specific political party of his time, choosing instead to run as a nonpartisan candidate for the office in both 1789 and 1792.  And now you know. And as the cool kids of my misspent youth were fond of saying…

And battle Catinari does, railing against a wide range of topics inherent with the characteristics that he so pathetically lacks: humanity, empathy, and common human decency. In all the time that I’ve been writing about the wretched slime that a person such as Catinari gleefully represents, I have never witnessed any other of his craven clan fighting half as hard as he, to achieve such a level of banal mediocrity.

Nowhere is this construct of mine more in play when Catinari, ever the intellectual dullard, attempts to utilize a “gotcha!” gambit using yet another of his favorite flails of flaccidity, a so-called “news source”:

Ah, yes… the highly regarded site of AMERICASBESTPICS.COM: aka; the launching pad for Catinari’s never-ending campaign to publicly showcase his ignorance. And while ABP may not ever win any form of journalism award, it at least still offers Catinari and the others of his ilk, to simultaneously pleasure themselves to its truly impressive archive of “FJB” memes as they prove just why their mothers should have collectively swallowed.

Catinari’s reliance on non-accredited websites is a topic that I’ve previously discussed in some length, so if you’ve forgotten or haven’t read them to begin with, I suggest that you hit the AB archive, and check them out. but since his researching skills are as sharp as his critical thinking skillset, I was more than happy to turn him in the right direction, because at my core, I truly am a person who wants to help enlighten the vapidly dim:

Nevertheless, even when given the correct information, and that albeit repeatedly, Catinari’s ignorance soldiers on undaunted, akin to the way in which Madonna still wants to be taken seriously as an actress, despite all evidence to the contrary indicating that her cultural influence has waned.

But Catinari, a man who consistently proves just why it’s a bad idea to breed with a first cousin, won’t be denied his right to be a walking pouter child for funding public education, and despite having unfettered access to the largest trove of information ever assembled outside of the fabled Library of Alexandria, has still somehow, achieved a level of intellectual density on par with the element known as osmium:

Once again, Catinari cherry-picks the relevant details of a story, and then presents then as being the whole of the law, as it were. While what he posted is true on the face of it, it’s also not what I as a writer and researcher, would call “fleshed out”., as several people encompassing both citizenry and police alike, had lost their lives in direct connection with the J6 attack.

To note, they were Ashli Babbitt, an Air Force veteran turned treasonous seditionist, who was fatally shot by a Capitol Police officer as she tried to breach the House chamber, Alabama resident Kevin D. Greeson, who died of a heart attack, dropping dead on the sidewalk just outside of the Capitol building itself.

Rosanne Boyland, a QAnon enthusiast, whose death was (albeit incorrectly) initially reported as being the result of being crushed to death amongst the J6 rioters, but which was later judged to be an amphetamine overdose. In addition to this already tragic (partially) listing, pro-Trump website “Trumparoo” founder Benjamin Philips, died of a stroke.

In regards to fatalities among the police, Capitol Officer Brian D. Sicknick, who was attacked by the throng of stochastic terrorists, died on Jan. 7. after suffering two strokes, most likely brought on by the events of that abominable day.  Said stress is also suspected in the suicides of Officer Jeffrey Smith, who shot himself nine days after the attack, Officer Howard S. Liebengood who preceded him four days earlier, along with Gunther Hashida and Kyle DeFreytag, thereby bringing the total of police who died in connection with this wretchedly failed sedition, to FIVE.

But let’s not focus on the reasons as to why these events happened or any of that, because Catinari desires a “GOTCHA!” win in order to rationalize his ideology, and if he needs to disingenuously distort the actual narrative to do it, that’s just fine by him.

ut to give limited credit to Catinari in regards to his being so dumb that hos homeroom teacher was forced to burn down the school to get him out of 3rd grade, he did at least “ask” Facebook if the meme he had posted was true or not. A query that being both asinine and insincere, I happily answered for him:

Rest assured though, Catinari had an intellectual retort ready, and it was DEVASTATING… sort of:
Yes Gerry… I’m “lying”. That’s why I can always back up my points using actual verified data, and you have to cut and paste “lol” as your so-called and wholly lamentable counter-defense.

I’m not sure just why you derive pleasure by posting debunked conspiracies as a taking point, and then finding yourself embarrassingly unable to assert any form of credible evidence to certify them, but hey- we’ve all got our own kink, and who am I to judge you for yours?  

Oh, that’s right. I’m the one who’s actually correct.

However, Catinari being an intellectually-handicapped reprobate, can’t accept realty at its obvious face value, and finding himself to be proven wrong as seems to be his niche, then deflected from his acquired drubbing by tossing out yet another inferred Alt-Wrong social media falsehood- that being, Facebook’s fact-checkers target only the slime-laden content that Neocons produce as if they were internet Hagfish:

As an observational aside, Catinari has been provided this information and its corresponding connection links, no less than THREE times, and yet, still uses this “I’m asking Facebook” gambit, as if he gets a royalty check for doing so. This sort of pathetic passive-aggressiveness mired in willing ignorance, my dear readers, is just why I so consistently question whether he descended from a lineage of Ancestors, or Incestors.

I say this only because I honestly have no idea as to why Reality and he stopped talking to each other quite some years ago, but I’m fairly confident that the nucleus of their metaphorical divorce, was debatably due to Catinari’s inherent inability to see (if not accept) things for how they actually are, and not as he’d like them to be.

Case in point, Catinari’s bordering on the edge of rabidness assertions that the travesties of J6 and its putrid practitioners, were all part of an insidious conspiracy to unseat the rightful ruler of these seemingly becoming Fascist States of America, Donald J. Trump. But before I dive into all of that, an announcement for both Catinari and/or any of his fellow mango-fellating, treason-supporting, truth-avoiding, fuckheads:

Despite all of the evidence that I’ve presented to the contrary, Catinari obviously considers himself to be a stalwart Patriot, and with that erroneous belief comes all the jingoistic tropes that you’d expect an American Nationalist to believe in: God, Guns, Glory, Mom, Apple Pie, a loyal dog playing in the backyard, a chicken cooking in the stewpot, and a white picket fence setting the allegorical boundary line of an intellect that could only be charitably described as being installed incorrectly, if not incompetently..

And my underlayment of proof for this proposition, you ask? Well, here you go:

Once again, Catinari reaches shallowly into his bag of stupid human tricks, and pulls out its idiot savant, the recently disgraced, always debunked, continually depraved, and currently unemployed conservative cuck, Tucker Carlson. And you just know that whenever you see someone using the word “Libtards” as an adjective, it’s definitely the Mjolnir of a validated argument that’s being swung at us all:

Tucker, best known for promoting White Nationalism while openly fantasizing about engaging in coitus with a green-tinted candy-shelled fictional chocolate company mascot, managed before he was unceremoniously dumped from FOX, to get his hands on several thousand hours of J6 surveillance footage from the Capitol itself, so that he could quite literally, whitewash what transpired on that dark day.

In a transparently blatant Hail Mary pass of sorts, Carlson, much like Catinari tends to do,  applied an underlayment of selectively disingenuous cherry-picking that could only be graciously described as “infinitely microscopic”, in an attempt to turn this broadcast as it happened instance of political violence;

Into this ever so touching and hopeful moment of peaceful outreach and brotherhood for all of Humankind:

So, you may ask, how was this rewriting of caught in the actual moment of History received by those outside of the Neocon bubble who both watched and experienced it, as it occurred? Well, it could have gone better:

Imagine that- the replacement theory conspiracist who knowingly lied about non-existent election fraud, also led about the riot that emanated from such a lie, as well? A reality that I was more than happy to comment on for Catinarl’s benefit, as it is both my niche, if not my chosen way of disseminating information:

Nevertheless, to this day, Catinari and the others of his inane ideology, still insist that the events of J6 were nothing less than the machinations of an insidious cabal staffed by shadowy agents of the Deep State, BLM, Antifa, Disney, the Illuminati, drag queens, or whomever else it is that the Alt-Wrong wants to obsess over that particular week.

And their desperately clutching to the hope that their mentally meandering conspiracy theories invoking their collective delusion, are right, even when they’re consistently being proven wrong, is synchronously both disturbing and hilarious, as evidenced by the stunning sense of denial contained within this posting here:

That’s right folks- nothing to see here, such as the live stream footage, text messages, and social media posts uploaded by the rioters themselves, or even the wall-to-wall news coverage either, because it was all a “lie”. A big fat stinking falsehood. Hence the reason why Tucker Carlson was so hard-pressed to find any video to work with for his bombshell “expose”, because it never happened in the first place.

It was all shot on a London soundstage by the believed to be dead cinematic genius, Stanley Kubrick, and everyone involved, including Trump himself, was a hired crisis actor paid with funds supplied by our Human-Lizard-Hybrid overlords, who are currently residing within the caverns located under Disneyland in Florida. Heck, that’s just as plausible an explanation as any these jackasses’ (sans any actual proof) have come up with, so I say we should just roll with it.

However, I am confused about one thing. If J6 “never happened” as Catinari and his fellow fuckheads are ever so fond of claiming, then why would he post something like this, in regards to an event that never occurred?

Sigh… every time I see one of Catinarl’s allegorical smoking gun postings adding to the ever-increasing reservoir of fabricated fictions surrounding the events of J6, I’m reminded not only why I regard him as both a dishonorable thief of oxygen, but as the sole reason that Humanity’s collective gene pool now employs a cadre of truly vigilant lifeguards standing at the ready.

Not to be overly flippant, but if you’re getting your “bombshells” from a source who goes by the moniker of “DC Drano”, think inside the box for once, and inquire just how much it would cost you to finally offset that tin-foil hat you own with a matching three-piece suit, because rest assured, that guy has the definitive hook-up.

I tell you, if laughter is indeed the best medicine, Catinarl’s assertions of incorrect intellectualism, must be curing the world entire. Now, while it seems obvious that Catinari is so goddamn stupid that he probably perceives that Cheerios are doughnut seeds, I’d go one step further, and strongly suggest that his birth certificate was originally filed with his birth-state as an apology letter from the CEO of Trojan Condoms.

This is due to my hypothesizing that while some babies may have been accidently dropped on their heads by their parents, Catinari’s on the other hand, deliberately thrown him at a wall Instead, given his inability to detect that this story is 100% false in both its narrative and its presentation. But you already knew that, as did we all.

That being, those of us whose brains aren’t perpetually swimming in Kool-Ade, and here’s why:

Capitol security is not solely the responsibility of the House speaker. It is provided by the sergeants-at-arms of the House and Senate, and by the Capitol Police. The House sergeant-at-arms reports to the House speaker, [Pelosi at the time] the Senate sergeant-at-arms reports to the Senate majority leader, who on Jan. 6, was Senator and human-turtle-hybrid, Mitch McConnell.

The direct responsibility for security concerning the Capitol Complex, is borne by the four-member Capitol Police Board, which includes both sergeants-at-arms, and NOT former Speaker Pelosi. In fact, as the Capitol riot escalated, both she and the Senate Majority leader, the afore mentioned Mitch McConnell, called for military assistance, including the National Guard.

Additionally, despite Catinari’s meme boasting that previously unknown texts and emails certify that Pelosi decreased or interfered with the security details of J6, none have ever been found or publicly presented, which seems odd, given the fact that the GQP desperately needs to whitewash the true details if this vile day, lest its fallout directly impinges upon their future electoral opportunities.

In fact, a Senate investigation into the Jan. 6 insurrection uncovered broad government, military and law enforcement missteps, including communication failures within numerous intelligence agencies, with some of the said fault being assigned to Capitol Police officers who found themselves sadly bereft of the necessary training and preparation vital to stopping such an event from taking place.

Jane L. Campbell, president and CEO of the US Capitol Historical Society, when interviewed by CNN, stated that “The Speaker of the House does not oversee security of the US Capitol, nor does this official oversee the Capitol Police Board.”

Pelosi also cannot unduly influence who is appointed to the Board, which consists of the House and Senate Sergeants at Arms, the Architect of the Capitol and the Chief of the Capitol Police. The Sergeants at Arms are elected and must be confirmed by their respective chambers and the Architect must be confirmed by both chambers of Congress.

And according to testimony from the former Capitol Police chief Steven Sund, Pelosi was not even involved in the decisions made ahead of January 6 regarding the National Guard. In his testimony before the US Senate, Sund testified that he approached both Sergeants at Arms on the House and Senate side on January 4 to request the National Guard through an Emergency Declaration from the Capitol Police Board.

According to Sund’s testimony, this request was not approved. Sund went on to say that as an alternative, the Senate Sergeant at Arms Michael C. Stenger; “suggested I ask (the National Guard) how quickly we could get support if needed and to ‘lean forward’ in case we had to request assistance on January 6,”

But forget all that which took me no more than three minutes to adequately research, five minutes to write up, and less than ten seconds to post online, for Catinari, the man singularly responsible for God creating the middle finger, has a meme burning a hole in his political porn folder, and Lord knows, you can’t just let a good fairy-tale go to waste, even if it can be proven by all, that its very essence is horseshit.

Nevertheless, being akin to a rabid cur whose brain is cooking inside its own skull, Catinari just can’t let go of this particular fever-dream that implicates Pelosi, and is the case with most obsessives when their delusions come crashing down to earth, he chooses to switch gears, rather than own up to his declared asininitiy. And when given this compulsion of his, if makes complete sense that he ascribes to the belief that if one conspiracy theory fails to land, the next one in line should most certainly do the trick:

As you may have guessed by now, no she didn’t. While Pelosi’s daughter the documentarian Alexandra Pelosi, has talked publicly about J6, her comments are nowhere near the bombshell admission that Catinari falsely claims occurred. Proof of this, courtesy of her December 12, 2022 interview with Vanity Fair Magazine:

VF: Can you walk me through how your January 6 footage came to be used in the hearing? Did you approach them, or did they approach you?

Alexandra Pelosi: “I offered it up to them and said, if you ever need it, let me know. I wanted to put it out so that people would not accuse me of holding it for my own documentary, because that’s a critique of a lot of people in the media. So I gave it to the committee, they used it when they used it, and then I decided to give it to everybody. I gave it to CNN, ABC, NBC, MSNBC—you know, everybody, so that today you couldn’t say to me, well you have this footage that nobody’s seen.”

VF: When did you offer the footage to the committee?

“Alexandra Pelosi: “Well first of all, when I got back to New York, I offered it—the committee didn’t even exist. I was contacting whoever. Everyone in DC knew it existed, and I offered it out from day one. Basically this is one of those kinds of open secret things in DC. I was always like, if anybody needs it, they can have it. My bigger question was like, when am I gonna release it to the press? I thought it had a news value, but there’s a criminal investigation going on; it gets very complicated. So that’s why I waited for the committee to use it before giving it out to the press.”

Now ,and  with all due respect, does any of this sound as if it bears any relation to what Catinari insists happened? Of course not, because as we’ve seen, the best that Catinari can do is reflexively regurgitate that which lands on his plate, and the truth be damned, especially if it fucks up the narrative that he’s hoping to sell.

And speaking of snake-oil salesmen, here’s yet another of Catinari’s bottom feeder political sources, America’s answer as to what might result if a low-IQAnon Antisemitic Barbie was granted barely functioning sentience, US Representative, Marjorie Taylor Greene:

This article is in reference to Greene’s commentary regarding J6, wherein she declared [falsely] that; “I was very upset. I never expected anything like that. And when it happened, I thought, ‘This is Antifa.’ And no one can convince me it was so-called Trump supporters. And we know there’s a lot wrong there, and I can’t wait for the investigations, real investigations.”

Greene who has zero proof to back up any of her absurd assertions, also defended the close to 1K people who’ve since been arrested for taking part in the J6 riots, the majority of whom, are now (ironically) being prosecuted using their own online posted videos, texts, live streams, and texts that prove their willing participation in relation to the ideological uprising

To this, all Greene could muster was; “They got charged for things they shouldn’t have done. They deserve their day in court. They deserve their due process rights”, essentially implying that these homegrown terrorists, were somehow being inhumanely mistreated under the auspices of the very Law and Order that they themselves, had so violently tried to abolish.

The unwarranted fantasy that the currently indicted, imprisoned, and jailed J6 seditionists re the “real” victims of cruel circumstance, is now an accepted part of the Alt-Wrong repository of victimization lore, and as such, shows no definable signs of cultural erosion as time marches forward: In fact, the disconnection from reality and the calls for action surrounding it, are seemingly escalating to a worrisome pitch:

While on the surface this might seem pathetically humorous, it’s the same virulent strain of mental illness that directly fomented the attempted J6 incursion upon our established democratic process. Despite the irrefutable evidence of that which we as a nation witnessed collectively, asshats such as Catinari, keep insisting that what we saw was not what we saw.

But yeah… Trumpers are so NOT in a cult, am I right? Regardless of one’s political leaning, the sane among us can all agree that the wanton destruction, the ill-tempered impudence weaponized against the Capitol Police, and the physical threats uttered in relation to our duly elected officials, was in its entirety, pathetic, treasonous, and abominably un-American.

And more importantly, it didn’t happen in the vacuum of a media blackout, either. It was live-streamed, recorded, texted about, and observed as it occurred, in real time. And no amount of revisionist rewriting on Catinari’s part, will ever change the validity of this recognized reality. But mythical God above love him as no one else will, he certainly works his dumb as fuck ass off, trying to do so:

From the comfortable perspective of time having passed, the fact that Tucker’s “expose’ turned out to be a nothing-burger of biblical proportions never before seen in this day and age, seems more akin to being an amusing footnote in History, rather than a disturbing attempt to retool its certified narrative, as this most certainly appears to be. And the reasons why “no one” wanted the Capital’s surveillance video openly released to the media, specifically Tucker Carlson, were patently simple.

Other than Carlson possessing a well-deserved reputation for being a devotedly practiced liar, the video also grants visual access to designated as sensitive and secure areas, pinpoints where certain security cameras are located, showcases Capitol security procedures and the like, and could enable those wanting to commit similar attacks, to discover just how Congress is protected in the wake of such an event.

And as I noted above, despite all of Tucker’s Free Speech posturing, the videos revealed nothing save for that which was already known by the general public, nor did it grant any form of credence to the Alt-Wrong’s ever-increasing pile of de bunked conspiracy theories, to boot. I won’t speak for you, but watching Carlson having to eat unending crow as he failed to certify any of that which he had been claiming for months to be true, was a glorious sight to behold.

Catinari, what with his handicap of being a total fucking moron and all, can’t seemingly grasp the obviousness of that which is easily debunked it seems, and because of this supreme mental disadvantage, lashes out in the only way that a stereotypical Trumptard knows how- by invoking Hitler of course, because for whatever reason, the rancid bowl of mayonnaise residing in his head that masquerades as his intellect, led him to believe that doing so, was both inordinately clever, if not wholly original:

Wrong on both counts Gerry, but  mythical Gd love you for trying, nevertheless:

Wrong on both counts Gerry, but mythical God love you for trying as hard as you do, nevertheless.

And as for your declaration that “Hitler was an Artist”, as if that means something of merit past the point of proving that as a child, you inadvertently ate a lot of lead paint chips, it’s not my side that crafted this image depicting your mange-tinted-rapist as being an artist himself so what does that say about your dude?

No matter how long this embarrassment of a man continues to slither over the earth, I’ll never tire of the depictions of him engaged in activities that he can’t do, isn’t skilled at, and has no interest whatsoever engaging in. Say, such as reading, thinking, and successfully passing for human, as simple examples?

Granted, his exceedingly limited physical stamina and even far lower emotional intelligence, play a crucial part in such, but I still love how his aggrandized depictions of self always manage to lose his triple chin, the ferret-nest hairstyle, his ever-present swollen man-gut, and the alleged “skin” tone that makes him look as if his mother conceived him by having sex with a sack of rotting orange inside a vat of fetid cottage cheese.

But in his limited defense, when one possesses the charm, the culture, the wit, the intelligence, and the personal warmth of a deep-frozen rectal thermometer wrapped in sandpaper to begin with, the set expectations that people in general have of you, tend to remain low, so let’s all keep that in mind if we may. And when it came to my responding to Catinari’s Godwin’s Law-inspired attempt at snide deflection?

And when it came time for my response to Catinari’s Godwin’s Law-inspired attempt at snide deflection? Well, because it’s me and I’m a “people person” in my heart, I gave it all the respect and credit it deserved, albeit with a minor spelling error, because to be fair, this guy really doesn’t deserve my best effort:

His ranting aside, Catinari does have a specific goal in mind though, and as you’ve seen from my using his own postings as proof, it’s all about deflecting the responsibility for the actions of the J6 rioters away from them, and disingenuously casting it onto the very same people that they were trying to harm and/or threaten into submission 

For as it was earlier noted, every time a Neocon opens their mouth, it’s ether projection or confession:

To note, nobody started “tossing stun grenades into the crowd” as if on a whim, until the same said dickless insurrectionist throng started their seditionist bullshit, which as you may remember, WE ALL SAW LIVE AS IT OCCURRED, via TV and the web, albeit Twitter, Tik-Tok, Instagram or Facebook.

Ans as you may have already surmised, I was more than happy to point out this reality to Catinari once more, if only for the personal satisfaction that my reminding him of such things, tends to vex him ever so terribly:

Weird how smashing the windows of the Capitol building, attacking the cops protecting it, and chanting about hanging the VP, for not violating the Constitution in order to salve the bruised maniacal ego of a man-child who lost a fair election, led to the meriting of an armed response from the authorities, but I digress, if only for the sake of not having to explain the truly fucking obvious to the actually sane, yet again.

As a recap of sorts, my constituent labeling of Catinari as being nothing less than an absolute fucking moron, akin to what the resultant spawn of a branchless family tree would most certainly present itself as, is I feel, accurate beyond any meritorious debate, and I will go to my allegorical grave believing this.

I base this assertion on both the stunning ignorance of his own words, if not his collective social media postings offered to the world entire, which at their assorted best, are seemingly indicative of an as yet unknown mental illness that to its credit, is slowly consuming what may remain of an intellect that could only be charitably described as being “adversely challenged”.

No matter what new information Catinari is exposed to, if it doesn’t align with the MAGA sludge pudding that poorly masquerades as his critical thinking skillset, it will find itself reflexively rejected out of hand and as we’ve seen, without the inconvenience of any dutiful research being applied to its veracity first.

And if after everything that I’ve presented to you, some of you still reserve some form of doubt in regards to this fact, then I can only offer you this close to last example of all that which I’ve been so sarcastically offering up for your enjoyment:

Yes, you read that right. Those weren’t insurrectionist or seditious rioters that we all saw on J6, they were “tourists”, who I can only guess, found themselves somehow unfortunately waylaid on their way to the Capitol’s gift shop.

Such an asinine declaration echoes the disingenuous words of Republican [naturally] Georgian Representative Andrew Clyde who suggested, and with a straight face no less, that; “Watching the TV footage of those who entered the Capitol and walked through Statuary Hall showed people in an orderly fashion staying between the stanchions and ropes taking videos and pictures. You know, if you didn’t know the TV footage was a video from January the 6th, you would actually think it was a normal tourist visit”.

With this single utterance of morally spineless commentary alone, Clyde singlehandedly reaffirmed the modern adage that while you can lead a brain-dead cultist to reality, you can’t make him actually think about it. Just remember kids, these noble and gentle souls were just simple “sightseers” interested in nothing more than spending a grand day out at the Capitol, and usurping our Democracy as they did so:

As a personal observation, let me just note that if this is Clyde’s truly-held belief of what a gaggle of gregarious day-trippers looks like, then I sure as fuck don’t want to know what next act of domestic terrorism he’ll be more than happy to whitewash, because you just know that whatever it may turn out to be, it’s going to make the events of 9-11 look like the 4-20 celebration at Coachella.

Ok, maybe that’s a bad example, considering 4-20 is also the saddest of days where Neo-Nazi’s celebrate the unfortunate occurrence of Hitler’s birthday, but I’m sure that the majority of you understood where I was originally going with all of that.

Thank goodness, because in this ,the golden age of instant offense, you never know how its ever going to go.

Sadly however, Catinari as it has been solidly distinguished above, will never find himself swayed by the merest of trivialities such as reason, logic, or the scourge of established and verified reality, no matter how many times he and it run into each other headfirst. Nowhere is this POV of mine better validated than when he posts stupidity like this, a discussion thread that fortunately for both you and I, is close to being one of the last examples that I’ll be discoursing on within Catinari’s nearly completed story arc.

As it’s been well-known for quite some time now, Misery loves company. But as it turns out, apparently so does mentally deficient density too, for there’s no better person to bolster Catinari’s collection of political paranoia, blatant lies and misrepresentations, GQP talking points, and the Cream of White man whining, than Catinari’s go-to heterosexual life-partner and equally as wackadoo no facts to ever offer wingman, Steve Laux:

And this my loyal readers, is why it’s generally a bad idea to huff paint during your formative years. Just a tip from me to you. But let’s carry on, if only for the laughs expected to come our way:And with that, we’re off to the emblematic races, albeit one run by dimwits that dumb-fucks such as Catinari and Laux, so proudly represent. However, given Laux’s previously established reputation for launching the most ignorantly unprepared of intellectual counterattacks, his “retort” was just what you would expect from a person so unintelligent, that they think that an innuendo, is an Italian suppository:

Has anyone else ever noticed that when their assessments find themselves cornered or openly questioned, nattering Neocons such as Laux seemingly have nothing to offer the discussion, save for snide sarcasm?

Certainly, that confidence in one’s self emanates from the knowledge that the facts or other such data that one might use to back up an argument, are not worth presenting when engaging in the simplicity of denying derision will do quite nicely in its stead. And when that gambit fails to work as it often does, all these morons need do, is shift gears as it were, and present yet another asinine theorem as certified fact.

But if I were to nevertheless offer limited praise to the one thing that I really do enjoy about jackasses such as Catinari tends to be, it’s that regardless of their being openly mocked, happily reviled, or finding themselves publicly shunned as if they were lecherous lepers, they still retain the delusion that they should proudly stand behind their fever-dream fantasies with a bucket of allegorical blood.

Nothing could be further from the truth of course, as the majority of what they spout is easily debunked, but when you’re as racist, paranoid, and blatantly misinformed as the maggoty MAGA faithful happily portray themselves to be, I can only guess that serving as a prime example of why it’s a bad idea to impregnate your sister, is all that you’ve got to hold onto.

Speaking of obsessive behavior, I’d like to end this screed on the singular poison that the MAGA faithful at large likes to hold close to their hearts, that being a nearly-maniacal hatred and distrust of the former US President, Barrack Hussein Obama. MAGAts, see Obama as nothing less than the virtual incarnation of Satan himself, for his “crime” of daring to be America’s only Black president, who unlike Trump, still remains as popular as when he inhabited the office, if not more so now.

The chutzpah of this guy, am I right?

Interestingly, unlike Trump whose administration was rocked by scandals both minuscule and massive, Obama never seemed to suffer the slings and arrows of misfortune as Trump so consistently did. This curious fact might have something to do with the datum that while Trump saw the White House as nothing more than a non-gilded and egotistical version of his Mar-a-Lago enclave, Obama viewed it as the people’s house instead, and treated it as such.

MAGAts for their part, are quite fond of maligning Trump’s validated detractors as “suffering from TDS”, [AKA: “Trump Derangement Syndrome”] while hypocritically dismissing the reality that they’re STILL whining about Obama, Hillary Clinton, and their 2020 election loss years after says topics were relevant, but when a political movement keeps beating an obviously dead horse into dust, as Trump and his slavish cult have been doing since day one of their collective existence, the inherent irony that such manifests, kind of handles itself.

However, I do actually understand just why these whining Wampeters, the lowest echelon of Trumpism’s false karass, act in the manner in which they do, and it’s ever so simple, no matter how you, or more accurately the MAGA faithful, choose to deliberately overlook it.

The Alt-Wrong needed a champion, was sold the idea of finally having found one that was beyond all questioning reproach, and when inevitably faced with the foreseeable sense of buyer’s remorse, opted instead to remedy the obvious flaws of its dripping in snake-oil purchase, by ignoring the ethical discomfort caused by their unabashedly following the ever-increasingly insane whims of a modern-day Aerys Targaryen.

Despite what you may think, this actually does make sense of some limited sort, as all of us at one point or another in our lives, have bought wholeheartedly into some undulated bullshit, albeit societal, political, or the once unshakeable belief that Highlander 2 was going to be a good movie prior to its unfortunate release. And honestly? There’s no shame in that. As I said, it has happened to all of us, regardless of our stature or intelligence.

Regardless, MAGAts faith that as corrupt as their guy most certainly is, that they’ll be able to project his multitude of sins unto others, remains a stalwart cornerstone within this moronic MAGA mob. Hilarious though, that the rabble that took such delight in taunting Hillary Clinton by screaming “Lock her up!” at their Nuremburg-on-the-half-wit rallies, have only experienced the embarrassment of watching their icons fall to the virtuous axe of Justice, instead.

Weird that, huh? It’s almost as if blatantly unchecked corruption and abuse of governing power, was considered to be somewhat problematic for those who unlike the modern-day GQP, actually still believe in the concept of rightfully applied law and order. A concept that the GQP has pathetically weaponized in order to attack those who exposed their party as the greasy-thumbed lying shills that they truly are.

Case in point, this classic display of ODS, AKA; “Obama Derangement Syndrome”:

Now, this is a severe case of the pot calling the kettle Mango, is it not? Fore I just have to wonder of Trump’s rabidly stupid followers found themselves richer or far poorer after his incompetent reign. Especially when you take into consideration this interesting little factoid, that I’m sure Catinari was going to openly discuss when he had the time to adequately do so:

Strangely however, I do get the feeling that much like Trump’s adultery, his history of graft, the reciting of fabricated events and interactions with imaginary crying people, and his attempted coup to retain a power that he never deserved, this particular detail will go unchallenged, as his way when he’s confronted with his own hypocrisy.

But rest assured, I was more than happy to correct his attitude in regards to his ignorance:

As expected, Catinari’s weak as fuck retort, while light on facts, was heavy on the deflection and grade-school insults, but to be fair, what else could he possibly present as a defense in their stead, given the fact that he had nothing of substance to work with? Note that despite being presented easily found and verifiable knowledge, not only couldn’t he challenge it, he also couldn’t disprove it, either:

And in a move that everybody knew was coming, his response (still free of evidentiary proof) got even dumber, as he threw in a new twist on a commonly held belief among the MAGAt faithful- that the gritting, serial-lying, money-grubbing, and possible money launderer that is Donald J Trump, had “divested” himself from all of his businesses. Because as we all know by now, he’s just fanatic about the ethics.

Now, while Trump did declare that he was “turning over complete and total control to my sons,” in regards to running the vast Trump business empire, his assurances were met with a collective response of “Sure you are” due to the fact that while his attorney presented a six-page plan to shield the con man president from potential conflicts of interest, his press conference announcing such, had stacks of folders on a nearby table that Trump claimed were “evidence” of the preparations he had made to give over control of his businesses to his sons.

One small problem, though? Not only were the gathered reporters not allowed to look at any of these so-called documents contained within the multitude of folders hiding them from public view, embarrassingly, the pages that were visible, appeared to be 100% blank. Meaning that, there was no definable presence of the pages ever having been numbered, nor were there any of the expected sticky notes that lawyers tend to use as page markers in large documents as well.

Adding to the belief of the illegitimacy of these poorly manufactured red herrings, the paper within said folders, also appeared to be of the wrong size, printed on the standard A4 sheet, rather than the normally associated legal size, and in one last pathetically obvious gaffe, the supposed folders themselves, were oddly free of description labels as well, despite Trump inferring that each of them was uniquely correlated with a dissimilar business.

Speaking of this truly humiliating PR debacle, US Representative Jamie Raskin, D-Md., a member of the House oversight committee, said; “The president has turned the government of the United States into a money-making operation for his family, his friends and himself. This is a complete betrayal of the constitutional design.”

Nevertheless, when it came to making good on his promise to remain dissociated from his businesses, you, like I, might be wondering how tt all worked out in the end, and as it was a question that USA Today was curious about as well, the answer that they uncivered was par for the course for America’s taint:

But yeah, Gerry… his two sons, one being the living embodiment of a case of Red Bull  mating with a case of AXE body spray, and the other one representing the human analog of a short bus, did a “great job”. And because of that, we’ll just overlook the reality that he was caught lying AGAIN, and as usual, you just happily took it up your ass once more, as you always seem to do.

As you may have noticed, at no point within this thread, did Catinari ever produce one shred of evidence to bolster his claim that America’s first (and only) President of color was corrupt. Not one curiously vague tax return, as his mango man-child’s documentation tends to be, not one court-delivered verdict of graft, fraud, or illicit business practices, as Trump has garnered multiple times in his past, nor has there ever been any eyewitnesses to such, as well.

Normally, I would suggest that it must hurt like hell to be this stupid and not know that you are, but I’m starting to think that Catinari at this point, must find the pain associated with his ignorance akin to a hand-job from porn legend Nina Hartley in her prime. And as I once had the pleasure of talking to her at the AVN Awards in Las Vegas, I can assure you, given her description over dinner regarding her favored technique, that analogy is way more apt than you might think.

As I close out this latest of screeds, I’m reminded of the words of James Madison, fourth president of the United States [from 1809 to 1817] who once observed that; “Knowledge will forever govern ignorance; and a people who mean to be their own governors must arm themselves with the power which knowledge gives”, a declaration of truth that quite sadly, will never find itself applied to the likes of Catinari, no matter how much he may believe it actually does.

And it’s not for the reasons that you may think. Catinari, a man I consider and hopefully have proven to be the possessor of an intellect comparable to that of a baked potato, does know the truth. He knows what he says (and posts) are either outright fabrications or cherry-picked sound bites, he knows who the real criminals are, and he most certainly beyond a doubt, knows just where the actual threat to our revered democracy actually lies- within himself and within his party. This he knows. And he couldn’t care less.

However, he also doesn’t like being reminded of that, and as such realities vex his fragile ego, eventually decided to block me from his Facebook page, as all true warriors for America are known to do when challenged. I’m not sure why that is, but I can only guess that it gives them the extra time that they need to work on seducing their sister, or something along those lines.

When I first introduced you all to the village-seeking-idiot that is Catinari on his finest days, I did so thusly: “This barely sentient, deception-huffing, cowardice-channeling, knuckle-dragging shell of amalgamated human pudding skin and hubris, has it all. And when I say that, I most certainly mean it. Let’s run down the ol’ ideologically Conservative bingo card, shall we? Conspiracy theories galore? The Illuminati says yes. Racist diatribes? Got that white. Anti-LGBTQ sentiments? No friends of Dorothy here.

And don’t you worry, we’ve got the standard misogyny, political ignorance, infantile paranoia propagandist news “sources” and the implied threat of Alt-Wrong valence as well to balance out the metaphorical deck, because if you’re going to be a walking stereotype, you might as well go all the way in, right up to that sewer pipe you wittily call a neck.”

These words, written in part one of this screed quatrain, are still ones I proudly stand by, and if anything, they ring truer today than when I first wrote them. Granted, that’s a lot of flowery words to use when the phrase “He’s a fucking moron” would have covered the point just as well, but I do like to expand upon my theorems with just a touch of elegant literary wordplay, every now and then.

But the fact remains nevertheless, that Catinari IS a fucking moron, and his own openly posted for the public to see words and memes helped me prove it. Thanks for doing the heavy lifting Gerry- it is truly appreciated. So therefore, I’ll end on one of the last exchanges that Catinari and I had just before he took the cowards way out and blocked me, rather than try to best me using a fact-based salvo to win the proverbial day.

Once again, Catinari, ever the pragmatist, reaches down deep into his soul, and pulls back up to the light, an attempted insult akin to that of a kindergartner, or at the very least, his political and emotional IQ.

Either way, it’s still on brand for the likes of him, but even so, I was still kind of disappointed by it in the end..In that regard, I’m probably similar to his Mom, who only realized just what she had spawned when he started babbling nonsense as a baby, and for whatever reason, decided to continue this unfortunate practice, well into the advanced age that he is now.

William Shakespeare once wrote that;  “A coward dies a thousand times before his death, but the valiant taste of death but once”, and it’s an adage that I place full stock in. And if it actually is true, then I can only conjecture that Catinari may be the closest thing that the GQP has ever had to possessing among its fetid and pathetic ranks, an allegorical Connor MacLeod. “There can be only one”, the Highlander once said.

But I had no idea that it would be this mentally damaged when it arrived, and full of chickenshit, to boot..

FINI.

“Can’t you see that I’m only advising you to beg yourself not to be so dumb?” –Petronius, The Satyricon