Wayne Michael Reich

Writing ∙ Photography ∙ Art


Month: January 2022

Shetter Island. (Fun with Dick and Lame.}

“Imagine the people who believe such things and who are not ashamed to ignore, totally, all the patient findings of thinking minds through all the centuries since the Bible was written. And it is these ignorant people, the most uneducated, the most unimaginative, the most unthinking among us, who would make themselves the guides and leaders of us all; who would force their feeble and childish beliefs on us; who would invade our schools and libraries and homes. I personally resent it bitterly.” – Isaac Asimov, The Roving Mind

Hello Bitchiteers!

Welcome to 2022, and all of the new possibilities it has to offer us all. Unfortunately, the less savory dregs of 2021 are still prevalent, because we as a country, couldn’t possibly possess nearly enough holy water and silver bullets to effectively smite all the demons of delusion within the borders of what was once considered a semi-functioning society.

Granted, we could try making these mouth-breathers read a book other than the one they claim to have, but to be fair, I doubt the majority of them would know how to even open one, to be quite honest. As they currently run unfettered, doing as much damage as they possibly can to the concepts of logic, civility, and basic humanity, it’s important to note that their motivation for doing so is beyond pathetic, if not wholly psychotic.

In a nutshell, the key word here being “nut”, it’s all to continuously feed the utterly ravenous ego of the world’s angriest Creamsicle, who, when not cosplaying as a toddler having a meltdown in a Walmart, has to constantly remind us as to what can happen when the slowest swimmer manages to make it to the egg first, and its landlord decides in the end, not to throw herself down a flight of stairs for the good of the country.

Just think about it. One cheap shoe heel, fortuitously snapping off during the decent from a second-story landing, and all of this could have been averted, with room to spare.

But the past is the past, even if it does still affect our future, so today, in an effort to make some sense of it all, we’re going to visit a metaphorical land that’s full of paranoic ignorance if not unfounded fear, and no matter what year it is, it always feels as if you’re still in the Dark Ages, due to the intellectual darkness that shrouds its existence, much akin to how dime-store bronzer attempts to disguise the fact that Donald Trump’s outward countenance, is in reality, just a bargain-basement human skin-suit that he purchased off of eBay.

And that task, most likely accomplished by using somebody else’s money via some form of marketed graft posing as commerce, because let’s face it- the man knows his niche.

As this photo of America’s former disgraced Fanta Fuhrer clearly illustrates, this moment of pure cringe, is exactly why he should have paid that extra couple of bucks for the super-grip option on the suits matching gloves.

For other than the fact that they’d keep his raccoon-applied makeup from running due to water splashes, they could also do double duty by firmly holding the pen he’ll need to use when signing all those case settlement checks to the United States Government, if not the women he’s allegedly sexually harassed over the years.

However, given the history of this adulterous, slandering, incompetent, seditious, cravenly, narcissistic, treasonous grifter, currently up to his fat neck in legal battles, potential criminal charges, and ever-increasing debt, I can honestly say that the destination I will be discussing within this screed, may offer him the refuge he so desperately needs.

It has everything a deposed wannabe dictator could ever want in an exile- endless worship, no consequence or retained memory for abominable behavior, and more than enough hypocrisy to make even the dimmest of Trump’s tiki-torch mob feel right at rally. And rest assured, nowhere within the limits of this twittering territory, will anyone ever mention the academic notations of self-taught Professor of Penis Forensics Stormy Daniels either, who once described her under-compensated sexual tryst with the World’s Angriest Creamsicle in the following way:

“He knows he has an unusual penis, It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool … I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart … It may have been the least impressive sex I’d ever had, but clearly, he didn’t share that opinion.”

Newsflash, you decomposing Jack O’Lantern? If you have to pay anyone, regardless of their chosen career, 130K just to f**k you, you’re never going to be regaled as a skillful conquistador of the Penis fly trap. Just saying. However, thanks to the dearth of critical thinking to be found only in this magical place, all of your bloviated braggadocio, fraudulent fables, and most importantly of all, your “Big Lie” regarding the election you tanked like a candy-ass bitch, will be accepted at face value, and echoed by the Tucker Carlson cosplayers strategically placed throughout this pustular paradise.  

Renowned for their ability to openly spew racist tripe as they simultaneously lick your boots, you’ll forget all those nasty if accurate, things that the legitimate Media ever said about you. Pay for the Platinum package, and we’ll even arrange for Sean Hannity and Matt Gaetz to come by and give you a horseback ride around your palatial padded room, day or night

And don’t you worry about their background, my rancid Cinnamon stick heir apparent to Hitler, as each one is the proud bearer of a *Deutschblütigkeitserklärung, so you can take supreme comfort in knowing that they’re Whiter than the sheets that they wear to those impromptu 3 A.M front lawn get-togethers they’re ever so fond of. In this Camelot of the Caucasian, the phrase “Black Lives Matter” means only that you can blame them for all of society’s ills, including the ones you help keep underwritten.     
*[A document provided to NAZI party members declaring them deutschblütig, or of “German blood”.

But enough waxing poetic regarding the amenities soon to be enjoyed by persons who take supreme offense at the thought of women, minorities, and non-Christians being allowed to openly express themselves, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, welcome to Shetter Island, a fiefdom of a singular conservative haranguer, who, being so preoccupied with highlighting his intelligence, failed to notice that he couldn’t showcase what he’s never possessed in the first place.

It’s proprietor, one Richard Shetter, whom I’ve previously described in an earlier screed as being the “best cosplay of a boiled ham that I have ever seen”,, an opinion I still stand by, has a truly dizzying intellect, if I were to be ever so diplomatic, and if I’m known for anything, it’s my love for heaping kindness upon the thought-provoking viewpoints of people who prove beyond a shadow of a doubt, just what happened to that weird kid in your Kindergarten class who used to mumble to themselves  in a far corner of the room, as they ate paste straight out of the jar.

Now, as regular readers may recall, Shetter popped up on my radar a while back, after another current Artbitch chew-toy, one Ruth Darlene Seawolf, issued a call to arms as it were against [allegedly] yours truly, for bringing her online harpy histrionics regarding God, politics, and of course the pandemic, to the attention of her corporate taskmasters.

Seawolf, who consistently eschews any valid criticism relating to her ever-increasingly bizarre public meltdowns as nothing less than a coordinated attack upon her thin as tissue-paper Christian faith, plays the victim so much using this threadbare trope, that if she’s seen in just the right light, one could swear that there’s a permanent chalk outline hovering around her.

Shetter, who comes off as being a few fries short of a Happy Meal, which is somewhat ironic, given his strong resemblance to Grimace having an attack of uncontrolled flatulence, was more than happy to swallow Ruth’s obvious twit-bait, suggesting that she should, and I quote; “Take the guy’s picture and put it ne here so we can harass him to see how he likes it”, a threat so without teeth, that Poligrip sent it a case of their finest product, out of sympathy

Now, this is not to say that Shetter couldn’t pose a potential threat due to some form of definable mental impairment or deficiency, but as I will hopefully come to demonstrate, if Life itself had an HR department, this midget of mentalism would definitely be on a first-name basis with not only the head secretary, but the water delivery guy as well, because I get the very string feeling that follow-through regarding actions and/or research, isn’t his forte.

Of course, this take of mine is based solely on my personally held theorem that his alleged critical thinking skills, appear not only to have gone untested, they’ve also remained securely wrapped within their original packaging, thus far. I don’t say this flippantly, as it is my nature to look before I leap, so like any good writer, I made sure to test out the waters first before I ever put on my Speedos made from flank steaks.

For instance, ff I come across a social media presence that features a sizeable amount of weaponry displayed as if it were someone’s girlfriend, I tend to tread a little more lightly than I might with other subjects, if only for the fact I really enjoy not waking up in a strange crawlspace, or being randomly blown up when I go to start my car in the morning.

Fortunately for myself as well as my fellow liberal-leaning New Mexicans, Shetter seemingly has no outwardly stated interest in assembling either a accumulation of politically-opposed strangers, or military-grade hardware to be stored underneath the floorboards of his home/

As is the case with a far too large majority of today’s modern self-identifying Conservative movement, Shetter does however, consistently utilize those Jimmy Dean sausages, he wittily calls fingers, to go online and type out his inanity, encased in a fetid mélange of paranoid conspiracy, thinly veiled racism, misogyny, and willful ignorance, poorly masquerading as commentary on the social, the political, and the cultural, three elements of our great society that Shetter refuses to see for what they clearly are, that being works in ever eternal progress.

Shetter’s fear-fueled inability to adequately comprehend the societal intricacies of Life itself, has less to do with the limitations instilled by his non-branching family tree, and far more tin common with the ideologies that he espouses as if they were both necessary and relevant to those of us whose brains and consciences actually still work the way mythical God intended them to.

Understanding this perspective, Shetter’s consistently derailed train of thought isn’t that unique, or even particularly shocking, given the abominable thoughts that one can easily find scattered across the social media landscape these days, but it’s still fun to mock, nonetheless.

Granted, while he’s not yet in the same league as previous Artbitch honorees, such as alleged bigot Ken Cykala, or the intellectual void that is Richard “Ricardo” Leyba, he’s still worthy of nefarious notation, and if I were so inclined to establish a ranking for the mentally meandering bulk that is he, I’d place him just above Silver City’s very own “F**k Biden” flag-hag Nick Lemme, and just below Silver City’s resident canonized Christian cat-lady, Ruth Darlene Seawolf, who to her credit, still serves as both a bad faith example, if not the evidence as to why religion is so destructive where the supposed feeble of mind are concerned.

And while the New Year to come will bring with it even more screeds regarding this lauded list of luminous lummoxes, today’s focus is all about our good friend, “Dick”. Sorry… I meant to say “Richard”, but in my limited defense, when I’m dealing intimately with someone who’s countenance resembles that of a waxed penis rather than the one of actual humans, the occasional Freudian slip is not only probable, but inevitable.

Sure, his sense of uninformed xenophobia may not be on par with Ken’s obsessive bigotry towards BLM, and even though he may not feel the White Trash need to Face-brag about receiving a free “Let’s Go Brandon” Christmas ornament from a fellow Trumper like Nick recently, if not embarrassingly, did, Shetter still blazes his own path, no matter what Reality might have to say regarding its trajectory.

On a more positive note, Shetter seemingly lacks the AXE body-spray esthetic of Lemme, and while he has publicly alluded to the mythical God in a comment or two, he, unlike his Facebook buddy Ruth Darlene Seawolf, isn’t ostensibly consumed by the mania of religious hypocrisy, so there is that, at least.

Sadly however, Shetter does have a touch of the conspiracist stench upon him, but unlike his fellow “Dick”, Richard Leyba, this sociopathic seepage seems more of the aftereffect of a warped worldview, rather than a mad embrace of what appears as a quickly fomenting mental illness, as is seemingly the case in regards to Leyba, who sees the teaching of CRT in public schools, as nothing less than communistic indoctrination, even though there’s not one school system in America doing so, as it’s quite literally, a graduate study level curriculum.

At best in my opinion, Shetter presents as a simplistic moron, cut from the same farcical cloth as the type of person you’d expect to see eating ten McRib’s in one sitting, and at worst, he’s a cautionary tale of what directly happens when you carelessly interbreed your familial DNA with the QAN network.  Why would I say this, you ask? Well, maybe it as something to do with the fact that he posts scam spam like this:Yeah… that’s not how Retail works. No major corporation is going to toss out perfectly good and financially viable product into the trash, regardless of scratches or minor damage, especially a money-grubbing company like Walmart, who’s far more likely to toss its long-term staff into an industrial shredder, long before any of the cheap crap that they sell.
Reading this, I can now see exactly why Shetter believes what he believes. After all, if you can put any stock in garbage like this, odds are pretty good you’ll buy just about anything that the GQP wants to sell you. Heck, he still buys into Trump’s collection of kooks, lies, and stinkers, and I haven’t the heart to tell him as of yet, that he’ll never get his money’s worth out of that purchase.A small sales tip from me to you: anytime one has to follow up their pitch with the words “Trust me” to get you to sign on the dotted line, not only should you not trust them, you also might want to not finish drinking anything they handed you prior as well. Just saying. I mean, I’ve heard of gullible, but it’s supposed to be a momentary choice, not a f**king lifestyle.

Because with all due honesty, the only thing I’d trust from a guy calling himself “Sailk Ali” is his opinions on exactly where I can get hummus, polyester shirts, and reasonably-priced gold chains, all in the same location.  And as you might have imagined, it’s his cousins place, just off the turnpike in Paramus.

And yes, while this could be considered a mild sample of Shetter’s predilection for basing his erroneous beliefs on no more than the slim chance that they might be validated, it’s also an indicator of just how susceptible Shetter is to the attractiveness of such inanity, if he feels it tenuously aligns with what he chooses to put his faith in. And what, pray tell, are the things he backs with his convictions?

Well, it’s definitely not modern-day Sconce, since I’m fairly confident that given the nature of his publicly declared stance regarding the ongoing pandemic, his trove of research regarding both the disease itself and its pharmaceutical response, was acquired by skimming YouTube content, and occasionally checking in with the voices in his otherwise empty head.

As usual, a person with no definable experience of essential context, and who also has no obvious grasp on the underlying factors inherent within the virology of a worldwide medical crisis, and without a single shred of credible evidence to support his assertion, somehow “knows” beyond a shadow of all reasonable doubt, just who is to blame for the situation at hand, that being the faceless and formless cabal known only as “THEY”.

As in, “THEY” are responsible. “THEY” planned all this. “THEY” are the enemy. THEY” sneak into my house at night as I sleep, and steal singular socks out of my dryer. I may not be sure about the first three things, but I’m goddamn sure I’m right on the money with the fourth. However, I must give credit where credit is due once again, as the logic of these anti-COVID cucks has evolved into what can only be charitably described as an orgy involving conspiracy theories, and paranoid schizophrenia.

And the end result of all of this intellectually bereft bacchanalia? Absurdity on a grand scale, I’m afraid.. First, Covid was a “hoax” perpetuated by the Media, eventually morphing into a “liberal / Deep State plot”: against Donald Trump, just before it settled into the discernment that it’s a purposefully designed biological weapon, a subterfuge orchestrated by Microsoft’s Bill Gates collusion with the streaming service Netflix.

Obviously, I made that last part up obviously, but you just know that in due course, someone’s going to float that theory at some point, if for no other reason than to test it out.

Till that inglorious day arrives wherein we all get to experience yet another slice of the Red Velvet cake of vacuousness that the GQP serves up ever chance it gets to do so, we’ll have to just make do with twatastic tripe like this:

Sigh…no, Dick. It is not “like the flu”, nor is it “the flu” either, as the actual flu itself kills an average of around 35K Americans every year, whereas Covid on the other hand, has led to the deaths of over 815K thus far. So, if one makes an argument based on just the tabulated numbers alone, Shetter’s depiction of their being equivalent in effect, is beyond the grace generally afforded to the densest among us, of which, Shetter is most certainly a card-carrying member of. .

As further proof for this opinion of mine, let’s peruse this critically barbed social commentary Shetter posted, despite having no outwardly definable or defendable debate points, to back up his willfully displayed self-delusions, not that he could (or would) anyway.
I won’t speak for you of course, but given the animosity that the GQP openly displays towards both public education and the people responsible for instilling it, Shetter’s asinine observation that teachers are the impetus for what he perceives as a failing society, is truly disingenuous at best. Keep in mind that this sentiment is being expressed by the very same people who say “don’t trust the science”, as they howl that the vaccines they so willingly slur, cause death, or surreptitiously serving as a carrier system for government-tracked microchips.

And don’t come at me with that bullspitt “Vaccines make you magnetic” fever dream, either. We’ll be here for hours, for unless you have a child’s macaroni art or a multitude of expired pizza coupons hanging off your face without the aid of glue or tape, I don’t really wanna hear about it. And in an additional side note, I will also state (yet again) to all that are gathered her today that CRT IS NOT BEING TAUGHT IN ANY GRADE SCHOOL WITHIN THE UNITED STATES.

However what kind of Red Velvet cake of Vacuousness would it really be if there wasn’t an extra-thick layer of creamy conspiracy icing sitting right on top of it? A palatable one of course, but such unappetizing foibles are beyond the cravenly palates of those who at this point, are so used to eating crow, they now refer to all their meals as “attending a murder”. Ladies and gentlemen, feel free to gnaw ot this serving of paranoid pralines like I did, and enjoy its easily debunked paranoia:Wow. that is truly a bold (if utterly false) claim, let me tell you. Unfortunately for Shetter, much like the Grinch who stole Christmas, I’m about to steal his brand-new Electro Who-Cardio Floox right out from under him, right before I melt it down into a set of “I got my Booster Shot” novelty lapel pins.

Unsurprisingly, while this post of Shetter’s was fact-checked as “false” by Facebook, it didn’t spur Shetter to actually undertake any research to see if it was true or not, a state of affairs which just so happens to be, the eternal Achilles for the majority of Conservative nimrods, as being presented with actual facts, versus biased opinion, literally cause them to have panic attacks.

For the record, there have been many fatalities stemming from Covid among politicians, the list includes such persons as first African-American Secretary of State Colin Powell, member-elect of the U.S. House Luke Letlow, 2012’s Republican presidential contender Herman Cain, U.S. Representative Ronald Wright, becoming the first member of Congress to die after testing positive for the virus, as well as Federal Appeals Court Judge Stephen F. Williams, just to name a few.

I’d point out that it took exactly 1.22 seconds to find all this out using Google alone, but I’m sure Shetter had more important things to do, rather than exerting the non-effort it would have taken to not embeams himself in public yet again. I don’t know the reason why he didn’t do so,, but I’m condolent that it had nothing to do with the allegation that it was his turn to bring the refreshments to his weekly conspiracy theory book club, and he was unfortunately pressed for time.

All 1.22 seconds of it.

Speaking of the passage of Time itself, Shetter and Seawolf have yet another commonality between them that I’d like to highlight, that being- they apparently both believe that the Antichrist is on hi way, and hopes to achieve his goal of bringing forth the biblical End of Days employing the ever so clever strategy of… wait for it… mandatory mask mandates!  I know… I didn’t see it coming either, and I was raised as an Orthodox Catholic. To be fair, their inane interpretation could just stem from misreading Revelations 13:17, which states; “And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name.” 

And if this notion of mine that they mistook “mark” for “mask” turns out to be even half true, then it’s not the case that Shetter and Seawolf share a exclusively fantastical delusion due to a limited intellect, so, much as it is that they just need to brush up their comprehension skills. Or I could go one step further, and suggest that they actually read the Bible, instead of fellating it, if only for a refreshing change of pace.

Nevertheless, the one area where Shetter’s understated faith on full display, compared to Seawolf’s that is, just also happens to be the one societal component that Jeus himself gave a considerable amount of air to-.I am of course, talking about serving for the greater good of Man. Loving thy neighbor. Welcoming the stranger. Protecting the weak. Provide comfort to the weary.

You know… the stuff that God commands you to do, as one of his humbly loyal flock? In other words, so not this:
You’re reading this correctly. Shetter, ever the boot-licking cur, appropriated a “liberal” meme to dares compare a respected Climate Change activist and recipient of the Gulbenkian Prize for Humanity, who’s never been connected with any form of social violence, to a cold-blooded murdering thug named Kyle Rittenhouse, who viewed a time of civil unrest as the perfect opportunity to go play Duck Hunt with defenseless humans

Adding insult to the grievous carnage he unjustifiably meted out, Rittenhouse, with no specialized training in de-escalation or conflict avoidance. And using a weapon he wasn’t legally allowed to own, in a town he had no connection to, then mercilessly snuffed out the lives of two of his fellow Americans, along with seriously wounding a third. And at the risk of being somewhat crude, I bet the thought of it gives Shetter serious morning-wood every time that he finds himself alone in the privacy of his mom’s garage.

Whereas Thunberg wound up donating her million-dollar prize to various charities “Fighting for a Sustainable World”, Rittenhouse on the other hand, has gone on to milk his fifteen minutes of infamy as a vanilla prop for those assorted guntards who need to strap on a penis before they can go use the bathroom… in their own house. He’s also squawked about suing the media for their depicting of him as an irresponsible murdering man-boy, so as you cans see his decision-making skillset remains just as sharp as ever.

If you ever decide that you truly want one photo that encapsulates everything currently f**ked-up about this country and it’s values, this one depicting two remorseless murderers celebrating their undeserved freedom, nails it pretty much dead on.  One lied about taking the shot when it was necessary, and the other lied about why he took the shot when it wasn’t.

But never let it be said that this human analog for fecal pudding, is without compassion, for as we’ve seen thus far, there’s no need for stating that which is obvious. By way of example, let’s take a gander at how Shetter views the plight of political refugees, fleeing a country that we waged war against for the better part of two decades:Truly, the very essence of Jesus, is it not? Does anyone else get the feeling that if Mary and Joseph showed up on Shatter’s doorstep, seeking sanctuary from Roman persecution, he’d immediately send a message via carrier Hebrew, to alert the legionaries as to which manger they were hiding out in? with no humor intended, Shetter may be the only person on his block whose seasonal creche features borer patrol agents placing the Baby Jesus in custody.

Contained within the book of Bronze-age fairy-tales that Shetter and others of his ilk reference consistently, yet never follow even marginally, Leviticus 19:18 declares that; “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself.”.

Now, for the rational among us, ‘your neighbor’ is a metaphor for all mankind, even those who may have, or currently may be, in the act of harming it. But to be fair, criminals and the consequences of their actions are somewhat hard for most of humanity to extend an olive branch of acceptance to, so by that definition, Shetter a self-decreed believer, should have as much contempt for a murderer such as Rittenhouse, that he would for a lesser criminal such as George Floyd, who was slew by police on the unconverted suspicion that he had attempted to pass a counterfeit twenty,

Such an act, I think we can all agree, is not a crime worthy of the death penalty, which is what Floyd abominably received at the knee of a sociopath who had been gifted with a badge, rather than with a working conscience. But as we’ve all come to realize through countless examples of disturbing disingenuousness, hypocrisy is the only value that the GQP faithfully ascribes to these days, and they’re not afraid to openly display it, either.

Although this in and of itself is a fairly obvious reality, Shetter tends to see it differently, believing that;

“Democrats say all the criminals are heroes”, which besides not only being patently untrue, is also so goddamn tone-deaf that Shetter could be an honorary member of Creed.

To retort, may I note that the only political party worshiping criminals with regularity is the GQP who thus far have lauded; Matt Gaetz (alleged sexual trafficking), Greg Gianforte (assault), Roger Stone (lying under oath), Paul Manafort (tax and bank fraud). Michael Flynn (lying to the FBI), George Nader (possessing child pornography and human trafficking) Steve Bannon (fraud), Elliott Broidy (conspiracy for failing to register and disclose his role in a lobbying effort),

along with a host of media pundits who, despite knowing exactly who was responsible for the January sixth sedition attempt, went on-air claiming that it was BLM and Antifa activists instead.

But yes Dick… it’s the Democrats who need to clean house. For the record, my paranoic pinhead, nobody is, or has, declared Floyd a “hero”. What they have acknowledged is that the manner of his death was undeserved, unconstitutional, and completely unwarranted, hence the reason for these community murals scattered across not only the United States, but the world as well, a factoid that unsurprisingly, you forgot to mention.

Perhaps you’d like to roll the dice, and see what if feels like to have a 160-pound man kneel upon your neck for ten minutes, and wonder if you’ll survive the experience, despite all the protective padding that larded sewer pipe you call a neck, provides. Although, it’s also transparently blatant that since the rotten cabbage that serves as your brain hasn’t received either fresh oxygen or required blood for decades now, so in the end, I’m sure you’ll be ok.

But to be clear, that’s due more to the fact that your intellect shares more in common with a pallet of rancid Silly Putty, versus belonging to an actual human. As proof of that, let’s peruse this ever so well-crafted thought directly transferred off of a Conservative’s comic page, shall we?

I will gladly offer up a free box of chilled Ding Dongs to the first person who can translate this sentence obviously typed in the middle of a stroke, into an actual coherent thought. I for one, seriously doubts that the political party that openly supports BLM along with wanting to launch equitable diversity and equality throughout all aspects of American life, has the ability to “make’ anybody racist, who isn’t already prone to its influence to begin with.

Democrats may be able to do a lot of things; that being overly optimistic, somewhat socially short-sighted, occasionally far too sensitive, and most certainly, ineffective as of late when it comes to battling an opposition that cares not who or what, gets hurt in its lust to achieve its selfish and horridly inhuman goals, but casting a spell of racism upon our enemies as if we were a cabal of Dungeon Masters, remains tantalizingly just out of our collective reach.

Maybe, just maybe, the reason you react so strongly to charges of racist behavior Dixk, is because you start off most of your jokes involving minorities, by looking both ways before you tell it, in what I can only assume is carefully selected company. Take for instance, these two examples of commentary posted by Shetter, wherein he regards a serious issue affecting modern-day society, keeping in mind that with at least one of these, the odds of his being tempted to open with “I’m not racist, but…”, were probably quite high.

Ah yes… the “school” failed him.

Not the child himself, nor the parents who live with him, who being in place as such, are correspondingly responsible for making sure that his scholastic development was progressing as it should. Nope, it has to be the fault of the educational entities that Republicans deride, underfund and demonize, as they challenge the (as of yet, nonexistent) curriculum that dares tell the Truth about America’s well-founded history of institutionalized genocide, bigotry, misogyny, and White supremacy underpinnings.

And Dick? Teaching kids to read, write, and spell, is quite literally, the “basics”. And the parents of said children are just as important to the process as the educators who set them upon their intellectual journey.

Subtle reminder- if you’ve raised a child to seven years of age, and they can’t read or spell, you’re the one that f**king failed, both as a parent, as well as a person. But according to Shetter, this assessment doesn’t apply if you’re a native-born citizen, of course, as this hypocritical judgement is reserved only for those who fall into the openly bigoted sub-category of the “other”:“If they speak English wouldn’t be a problem you come here learn English”, says the person who cannot grammar or properly structure a sentence, even if his undeservedly arrogant shell of a life depended upon it. To note, this ignorant trainwreck of a sentence should have read; “If they spoke English, they wouldn’t have a problem. If you come to America, you should learn English.” 

Glad to help. It’s truly a shame that what I can only assume is your bargain basement GED, failed to do so. Shockingly, for persons (so-called) like Shetter, the knowledge that being fluent in English is not a requirement for residency in this country, nor should it ever be, given the history of how the strength of the immigrants who set its foundations contributed to its potential for greatness, tends to be received as quite the shock.

Especially when they realize that their bigotry makes them the minority, not the majority that they require to face life itself without fear regarding the consequences of their actions. Hence the reason for their incessant need to manufacture scapegoats, as a means to rationalize the failure of the lives. Nothing is ever their fault. And every unfortunate happenstance that happens to them, is always due to the machination of others, and not the inability to manifest their true destiny.

Shetter’s view of public education however, is a mélange of misinformation, mixed with a post-50’s quasi-reality that never really existed, as proven by yet another posting by this high school guidance counselors’ nightmare. If Shetter ever had (or does have) kids, I can only imagine the game of heads or tails that occurs in the teachers’ lounge prior to the one homeroom teacher forced to meet with him during their annual parent-teacher conference.

I can only imagine the slurs of incompetence he’d levy, if the compiled list below was what he expected his kids to learn at school, and not at home, as the majority of us did.I’d take the time to note that his high school also allegedly never taught him as we’ve seen from his postings, other vital life skills either such as grammar, understanding context, basic science, the application of political theory, or respect and tolerance for his fellow Americans differing point of view, but in its limited defense, one can only shape a mound of sentient mashed potatoes so far before it collapses in on itself.

Granted, there are quite a few aspects listed here, that even I, a societal cynic, would like to see integrated into a school’s overall curriculum, but I’m also a realist at heart, when it gets right down to the brass tacks of things.

However, given the overall lack of stable funding for public education, thanks in large part to GQP interference, to demand such programs to be singular certainties in this modern age, is beyond asinine, because whether Shetter believes it or not, these concepts can be gleaned from within the available structure. Not to mention, if someone wants to learn how to do anything in this, the Age of Accessible Information, all they need do is engage in the wackiest of actions, such as,, you know…


This just now leaves Shetter’s disrepute targeting the Pythagorean Theorem, as it’s fairly obvious that he never learned that principle either, since its relevance to everyday life, is pretty much a given, to those of us who actually did pay attention in class. By the by, the Theorem is valuable for plotting not just two-dimensional triangulation, but navigating by air, as well. Muralists (as I once was) also adjust the theorem, in order to determine the appropriate ladder height in order to safely complete their work.

And yes, that actually is a thing, if you lack for a cherry-picker.

In a more contemporary vein, the size of a TV or a computer monitor, is always a measure of diagonal, as their respective sizes are, in actuality, the value of the hypotenuse. I’m sorry that I had to bust some knuckles with my metaphorical ruler just now, but when I’m laying down a cold dose of reality, conservative chowder-heads such as Shetter, are already on the thinnest of ice with me.

And speaking of things that are thin, let’s discuss Shetter’s view regarding that which is certainly guaranteed to start a fight over any holiday dinner, American Politics. As is to be expected, Shetter’s echo-chamber worldview, is in full lockstep with the self-styled victimhood of today’s conservative movement, which centers primarily on moral codes they regularly betray, social issues that they care nothing about, and paranoid fantasies that give their faux ideology its fuel.

A representational case involving all that I just noted, if I may;

Sigh… this poor socially-stifled veteran. taking to the streets of America, illustrating the seriousness of his political suppression. Can you just imagine the chilling of personal expression that this Patriot finds himself fighting against on a daily basis? Sure, his ideology wants to decree draconian actions against minorities, social justice advocates, feminists, the LGBTQ community, and most disturbingly, the Free Press, but feel free to jettison this reality, because he and his bleating brood, are the real victims here.

The pain of using your constitutionally-protected power of Free Speech to complain about a repressive government that only allows you to protest in public? Brutality, plain and simple. And knowing that as a white middle-aged person, your odds of being harassed, assaulted or facing arrest, is literally zero, must be one heck of a mental burden to carry, let me tell you.

That is, when you don’t have the security of internet access to Facebook or Twitter, but that’s it. And once you deliberately ignore the reach of Tik Tok, Instagram, WhatsApp, Snapchat, Foursquare, Reddit, YouTube, independent websites and their associated media outlets, you my friend, have no options whatsoever.

Nevertheless, Shetter steadfastly goes forward into the fray, brandishing all the contempt his corpulent paranoid delusion can muster, by railing against one of  the most controversial concerns of our time-, the topic of the moment being, and I swear I am not making this up, sex changes for five-year-olds:

I know I may just be screaming into the wind here, but is this some form of social plague I have been blissfully unaware of? Not the falsity of Shetter’s belief that five -year-old children are being regularly allowed to undergo reassignment surgery, as if they were casually visiting a McDonalds mind you, but that supposedly functioning adults think that this is actually occurring?


At least, not in the way tha6t Shetter froths at the mouth over. While there have been some notable cases, the reality of such is yet another brick in the wall of insanity that conservatives have constructed around themselves, as well as their already severely limited intellect. Seriously… I don’t know which is far more pathetic here, the delusional caprices that conservatives like Shetter put stock in, or the fact that they came to these conclusions without doing the merest of research regarding them, first.

Sadly, Shetter’s stance regarding that Gender Dysphoria can be simply “fixed” by the critical selection of what gender specific toys the allegedly afflicted chooses to play with during their earliest developmental years, is simply asinine beyond rationality. If anything, it would more likely just reinforce the conviction that said individual feels to be wholly correct, the belief that they’re trapped within the wrong construct of gender

When our friend Dick here, gets done obsessing over contrived falsehoods involving the genitalia of underaged strangers. I’d recommend that he educate himself on this particular issue, but let’s be honest here. He’s not going to do that, and I’d have far better success wishing for him to be trapped in an elevator with lauded transgender actress, and LGBT advocate, Laverne Cox. If that blessed event ever does occur, I can only imagine just where she’d suggest he park that alleged gender-fixing truck.

Hopefully, someplace uncomfortable, that will require his future proctologist to ask him some truly disturbing questions as to what the physical representation of his transphobia was doing there. On a further pathetic attempt to justify that which confuses him, Shetter is quick to post so-called “proof’ from the not biased at all “news site’, cnsnews.com:CNSNews is quite proud that it’s mere existence provides, in its own words; “an alternative news source that would cover stories that are subject to the bias of omission and report on other news subject to bias by commission. In order to address the lack of conservative opinions in major news outlets across the country,”

And how did CNSNews decide that unlike itself, media was full of liberal bias? Well, by using numerous studies conducted by a source of unquestionable integrity, that being the Media Research Center, the parent organization of CNSNews. What a truly stunning turn of events, is it not? While on the surface, this might appear to be a massive conflict of interest, I’d like to go on record to note that this judgement carries just as much weight as when my mom said I was the best oldest son she had ever had, if not more.

As for Shetter’s almost incoherent lead-in to this biased as f**k faux poll, I’ll just take the briefest of of moments to yet again, correct his abominable syntax, punctuation and ever-increasing inanity: “Yes(,) (there’s) only two genders(.) (Q)uit (trying) to change it.”

If the maxim “”Reality has a liberal bias” is even remotely accurate, the first thing I’d suggest Shetter acquire after an in-depth discussion with a transposon, would be a visit to a Kindergarten class to brush up on the literary comprehension skills he ignored in favor of feeding his jar-a-day paste habit.

Carrying forward with his theme of uttering opinions about social issues that no one asked his opinion on, Shetter posted this confused gem, possibly concerning the issue of an actual living wage, versus one that currently, only allows you to barely exist. Or maybe it’s about kids being lazy. It’s kinda hard to tell.

At the time of this screed, (01/2022) the federal minimum wage is $7.25/hr, although the rate states can range from that lowest of baselines, up to $15.00/hr, depending on the individual state. By comparison, and this, according to deputation statements filed for the 2020 fiscal year. the current CEO of McDonald’s, Chris Kempczinski, earned $10,847,032 in total compensation.

Of this, $963,506 was noted as salary, $4,750,011 as stock options, $4,750,129 as bestowed stock, and the remainder, $383,386, was derived from various forms of recompence. Essentially, if one excises his corporate “perks”, Kempczinski, if he worked a standard 40 hours a week, which I doubt strongly, raked in an average of $501.83/hr, or (roughly) 60.21 times more than his lowest paid employee.

Now to be fair, while I’m not sure what Shetter’s point in posting this meme was, I’m also pretty confident that he has no idea what that point was intended to be, either. Is he upset those teenagers and young adults, no longer want to work these types of jobs due to their being overworked by managers, if not feeling underappreciated by “Karens” like Shetter, who most likely, will pitch a fit if he can’t get a Big Mac shoved into his flatulent maw in under five minutes?

Maybe it’s his unfounded fear that said conglomeration of Soy and Salt, will see a price increase if indeed, the Golden Arches pays it’s workers a vastly improved wage they can utilize a successful life with, versus maintaining the one they currently experience, scraping by on the thinnest of margins?

of our intellectually vacuous incredible bulk here, I’d note that in Denmark, McDonald’s workers make an average of $22/hr, get 1-year parental leave, and a significant retirement package, yet the burger currently costs around $4.87, 79 cents cheaper than the average $5.66 cost in the U.S. therefore, I can’t ascertain what supposed “problem” Shetter is alluding to, overall.

And as for his inane notion that as yet, unnamed people need to quit “babying their kids and make them get jobs at McDonalds sonic like it used to be. And learned Work ethics”, I’d have to opine that maybe Shetter (once again) should learn how to first compose the English language properly, before he gives life advice to anyone.  Just saying.

I could easily inform this bulbous blowhard if I so wished, that not only are McDonald’s and Sonic separate corporations, but that unlike his perception, the average age of a worker at McDonald’s is 24, hardly the teenage demographic that Shetter imagines as the franchise’s backbone. However, as I’ve noted throughout this blogvella, the ability to undertake actual research, seems far out of the grasp of Shetter, a man who, even to the most casual of observers, appears to have been assembled out of a stack of rancid Egg McMuffins.

And what pray tell, does Shetter exactly consider to be “work ethics”? The desire to keep a low-paying, high0abuse menial job, only to be in servitude of persons who deride the very same workers as “burger flippers”, unworthy pf a living wage, yet still demand that they tirelessly perform a service that they themselves, are both unwilling and unable to do?

Let me say this now; there IS NO SUCH THING AS “UNSKILLED LABOR”. This descriptive, when dissected at its core, is no more than a capitalistic rationalization to justify the dispersing of slave wages for essential work, that those who consider themselves to be the truly elite, feel is beneath their typically self-declared and illusory status in life, and when applied to lower-end endeavors by such people, it reminds one of a quote from “Macbeth’, written by William Shakespeare, that states simply;

“It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

And if you doubt this assessment of mine, just look at who spares no opportunity to degrade the lower-end workforce; the very same self-appointed elites, whose economic grip on established power, is crucially dependent on those who, without any certified promise or hope of consistent reward, provide the metaphorical mortar that is so central to the structural integrity of their allegorical ivory towers.

Speaking of ivory towers, it should also come as no surprise that Shetter felt the need to cast some judgement upon the waters of the incel pond on which his boat allegedly floats, in order to slur the other red meat target conservatives salivate over, that being independent women who dare make choices that they don’t agree with:Is anybody else staring to get the feeling that Shetter’s rebuke stems from the fact that the only time a woman ever willingly got down on her knees in front of him, was so that she could pray that he would stop talking to her? Good. I hate to be alone when I’m assembling a verdict, and if I were to go a step further, I’d put forth the notion that the half-truth of the petulantly toxic male joke; “You know the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut will screw anyone. A bitch will screw anyone but you”, is something he thinks about… a lot.

As with all things incendiary that I write, I base it all on the actions and actual words of those that I mock, as I’m loathe to ever pass up truly free joke fodder. In Shetter’s case, I refer to the meme’s resentful introduction that he wrote, and in which, he attempts (and fails) to degrade both the character of women in general, but only succeeds at disrespecting his own:Let’s review: Sullenly implied misogyny? Check. False conclusion based on the allegation that Shetter couldn’t can’t get laid without collateral being presented first? Check. Whining that no one will give them a fair shake, without acknowledging the possibility, that the problem just might be you? Check, hell yes.  

Now, I wouldn’t dare say that Shetter doesn’t know how to treat a woman, even if the one he chooses comes without an air pump, a patch kit, and a full warranty on her vacuum attachments, but I would infer that as a rule, most women tend to find willfully ignorant, sociopath supporting, over-obsessive transphobes, somewhat on the spectrum’s’ edge of unattractive. And when I say that, I’m not actually referring to Shetter’s limited physical appeal, so much as I am regarding his lack of intellectual acuity.

After all, I once knew a girl who had a full cover tattoo of Jabba the Hutt on her back, so there’s obviously someone for everyone. Don’t shoot the Snark, my dejected Dick, for I don’t make the rules. I just note their validity. As long as I live, I will never understand why male conservatives in general, regard themselves as such a supreme catch, considering how close their political ideology aligns with the one espoused by those who proudly self-identify as “Incels”.

For the few of you who may be unfamiliar with this term, an Incel tends to be a man who regards himself as being unwillingly celibate, an as such, typically displays extreme resentment and hostility toward those women that they feel are to blame for their metaphorical imprisonment within a sexual gulag, The etymology of the term  itself emerged from an online collective in which scores of such man-boys, rail eternally about not being granted access to physical pleasures that their own fantasies will no longer compensate for.

This movement of mewling mama’s boys has advanced, is also responsible for multiple acts of violence against women, enacted by craven cucks, who, due to their own hands refusing to touch them any longer, without being drunk first, feel justified in their actions. If Shetter is lonely because no rational woman will have him, I’d suggest he get a dog instead. Granted, he doesn’t deserve a dog, but then again, I can’t think of what any woman could have done to deserve Shetter’s misogyny either, but here we are.

Fortunately, for me at least, Shetter is no one-dick pony. He’s just as equally ignorant regarding the political landscape as he is regarding the ones previously dissected. It’s not just the case of his being abominably misinformed, paranoiac, and guilelessly gullible, it’s the fact that he seems absurdly happy to remains so, in this, the age of immediately accessible knowledge.despite the resources that are openly available to him, Shetter instead, chooses like most chowder=head conservatives to align themselves with “news sources” that already echo what they hold to be true, regardless of the veracity of that belief.

For instance, peruse this example that Shetter considers to be a pinnacle of intellectual enlightenment:

As I’ve oft said before I won’t speak for you of course, but I for one, love it when the wackadoos play all their classic hits. A shadowy and unnamed cabal working against Americans? You bet. A vaguely referenced alliance between corrupt entities, presented without one shred of evidence? Would you expect anything less? And in an unpublicized move nobody saw coming, except everybody with a brain that is, there’s even a cameo from eternal conservative boogeyman, Barrack Obama!

And the joy of seeing all of this previously concealed information being exposed by a guy who looks like a golf store salesman, in front of what I can only assume, is a shower curtain from Bed Bath & Beyond? That alone, is worth its weight in chilled Ding Dongs, let me tell you.

So, let’s recap: “Crooked democrats” have “evidence”, that the Republicans don’t (?), but “held back”, because “Obama put them in jail!” I may not be a Neurologist, but I’d have to surmise that oi a certified one ever manages to crack open Shetter’s cranium, the neurological pathways that convey his thought process probably looks like a vegan lasagna that’s been assembled inside a concrete mixer. 

I don’t know how to explain this to Shetter and the rest of the dumbf**ks who believe that vlog-casts taped in a free corned of somebody’s garage, count as reputable journalism, but if such a conspiracy existed, its demise would not come qt the hands pf persons who dress as if they’re attending a PTA meeting. Not to mention, if there was indeed a corrupt alliance between media and the intelligence community, this video, and the numerous others that are sadly like it, would never have seen the light of the day, in the first place.

Sorry, Dick, but in the end, you and your tin-foil-wrapped conservative crew aren’t ‘exposing” spit. Other than your obliviousness, gullibility, and the shallow depth of the gene pool you slithered out of, that is. But keep your chins up, nonetheless. One day, you’ll discover that walking upright for you would be far easier, if you ever manage to stop carrying the dead weight of all that stupidity, or it will eventually crush you.

Either way, it’s a win for our side.

However, winning really isn’t an attribute that conservatives possess in the slightest, unless of course, they shamedly legislate their way into it. While this may it be outwardly obvious to persons like Shetter, it is most definitively clear whereas the rest of us are concerned, and the litany of their well-earned failures eats at their self-worth as if it were salt poured upon a slug, which quite possibly, the most apt analogy I could use to rationalize their ideological need to chastise unfounded boogeymen.  

Once again, I present personal mental dysfunction, poorly disguised as political commentary:
At the rate these disciples of academic deficiency are stacking their imaginary grievances, this former and yet still-respected US president, will probably start getting blamed for causing the Holocaust next. I mean… the last time I saw middle-aged White men obsess over an African-American this much, was when they thought that they could finally humble-brag about having a Black friend in the personage of Kanye West.

Well, 3/5 of one, anyway.

So, as I do with all things contrived from equal parts bullspit and the conspiracy-laden masturbatory fodder of conservatism, let me just dig into this cravenly safe space as it were, and expose its fetid interior to the purity of data-driven daylight. And we’ll start with the first topic on Shetter’s invented laundry list of paranoia, since it’s also one of the most erroneous.

“Before Obama we had no ISIS!”
For the uninitiated, ISIS is the acronym for the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria), and is also known as ISIL, or the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant. It self-identifies as a Sunni jihadist caliphate, with a predominantly vehement political ideology, claiming religious authority over all Muslims. It draws inspiration from similarly motivated contemporizes al-Qaida, despite the latter’s public expulsion of it.

Unfortunately for the strength of Shetter’s narrative, the majority of scholars knowledgeable in the political history of the consistently turbulent Middle East, agree that the group formed as a response to the 2003 US invasion of Iraq. For those of you who can do math, that’s SIX YEARS BEFORE Obama was sworn in as President, but I’m sure Shetter will find a way to “prove’ that such information is somehow irrelevant in regards to his asinine assertion.

And besides… we all know that Obama was responsible for green-lighting Highlander 2, and no one should ever forgive him for that. Especially Michael Ironside.

“Before Obama we had no BLM!”
But we still had White supremacy, inherent racism, and racial disparity in regards to education, banking, job and economic opportunities, along with definable inequality in criminal sentencing, which are literally the things that BLM pushes back against as well,s o what exactly, is your f**king point?

Are you annoyed that them there “coloreds” are getting all uppity in that blob of rancid marzipan that you call a face, or is that you can’t abide African-Americans being allowed to do white people stuff without police intervention? Nah., that couldn’t be the reason, right? After all, as a middle-aged White man living in a state that has fewer Black people in it than there are to be found at a Trump rally, I’m sure that your appreciation of different cultures is just as strong as your acceptance of the Transgender commubity.

Oh wait…

For the record, BLM, pr Black Lives Matter was founded in 2013 as a social justice movement, after a dickless guntard known as George Zimmerman, was acquitted for his role in murdering African-American teen Trayvon Martin, who had neither committed a crime, nor possessed upon his person any form of dangerous weapon, unless you consider a bag of Skittles as felonious. I for one don’t, and I just so happen to be, a full-blown Type-1 Diabetic.

Zimmernan for his spart, would go on to suffer additional scrapes with the law, ranging from traffic violations to threatening others with (what else) guns, but has always found himself suffering no consequences as a result of his actions that in all reality, would get persons of color executed like a dog in the street. But remember, it’s that nattering Negro that was the real social cancer in America, kids.

Spurious Goerge, who has all the spine one would find in jellyfish, would also attempt to forge a side career of sorts for himself, appearing at gun shows, where he would gleefully sign Confederate flags and bags of Skittles, for other testicle-free sociopaths like himself, which just goes to show us all what happens when you consistently abuse yourself using gun oil, versus the far-safer alternative of hand cream.

So, as you can see, the bad guy is obviously Obama, and not the two parboiled chunks of racist lard depicted here, grinning as if they’ve just bought a t-shirt commemorating a lynching.

Just a side note Dick- the actual mission of BLM, not that you care to have your bigotry deflated, is, and I quote; “To eradicate white supremacy and build local power to intervene in violence inflicted on Black communities by the state and vigilantes. By combating and countering acts of violence, creating space for Black imagination and innovation, and centering Black joy, we are winning immediate improvements in our lives.”

Yup… you can definitely see the handiwork of Obama all over that statement, can’t you/ the nerve of these people wanting to abolish White supremacy- have they not thought what would happen to the Trump memorabilia vendors if they wound up educating his base? Hell, red hat sales and racist meme production would plummet overnight.

“Before Obama we had no ANTFA!”
Actually Dick, yes, we did. Back in the day, it was called the United States military, and we used it to handedly defeat Adolf Hitler in 1945.In the present age, it’s a group that actively opposes all forms of fascism. Described by American sociologist, political writer, novelist, and cultural commentator Todd Gitlin, as “a defensive response to the growing presence of right-wing extremism”, it is in simpler terms, the social antidote to what Shetter’s misinformation so disturbingly represents.

Nevertheless, who’s to say that being ideologically on the same side as those who tried unsuccessfully to usurp democracy is a bad thing? In spite of everything that Shetter has posted and believes, I still want him to have close friends with similar interests, and you know it’s just a matter of time before someone in that collective group of sentient urinal cakes, suggest that they do something that’ll almost certainly thin the herd among their ranks. Like going to an indoor rally without masks, by way of example

Roll the dice kids, for adventure awaits, as does an eventual ventilator.

“Before Obama we had no war on cops!”
This statement, on the surface at least, is entirely true. At the time of Obama’s initial inauguration there was no “war” on cops. In a weird twist of coincidence, until he got elected, there was also no “war” on Christmas, hot dogs, Dr, Seuss, masculinity, hamburgers, Styrofoam, plastic straws, Thanksgiving, small business, parenting, personal privacy, the parameters of gender, religion, billionaires, Western (White) culture, and as always, White men who wear red hats,

And yes, these actually are topics that at one point or another, Conservative media seriously claimed to be under a siege of Leftist attacks, depending on whatever lie they happened to be pushing at that moment. With that knowledge in hand, I can reasonably assume then, that the “war” on cops must be just as valid as the one that conservatives declared was being waged against soda.

According to former police officer and assistant law professor at the University of South Carolina, Seth Stoughton; who has been scrutinizing compiled date regarding police fatalities collected over several decades; “When we’re talking about 780,000 state and local police officers who are interacting with people on 67 million occasions every year, the increase from five to eight, or five to 10- statistically, it doesn’t look significant,”

Further corroboration of this assessment, is provided by the graph below, which shows that as a rule, the number of what are considered felonious deaths has actually remained fairly consistent over the years.

Ironically, the numbers took a slight jump during Trump’s failure-failed tenure, although that could be simply attributed to his followers assuming that being White gave then immunity from prosecution. That’s a small joke obviously, but the data available quite directly sates that there is no “war” on cops, despite the screeching of Shetter and his inane ilk, saying that there is.

However, despite all that I’ve dissected thus far, it’s collective density pales in comparison to Shetter’s last alleged “point’ contained within his posted declaration pf abject absurdity, and let’s be honest with ourselves, if we may, because that’s saying a lot, given the evidence of his failed schooling. And you know he’s really serious, because he felt the need to signify his lack of intelligence by iodizing the calling card of morons far and wide… ALL-CAPS.


You heard it here first, boys and girls- Obama, the Great Divider, who had the audacity to serve as our 44th President, despite knowing he was African-American, is responsible for all, yes all, of the divisional strife that this once unblemished country finds itself currently suffering from. I can’t speak for others of my generation, but finding all of this out now in my middle-ages, comes off as almost a relief.

Knowing that four hundred years of treating African-Americans as of they were like cattle, the rise and continued existence of White supremacy groups, the implementation of of Jim Crow and other purposely intentional racist exclusionary policies, banning interracial marriage, as well as access to educational, financial, and economic opportunities, are, in situ and in total, the sole fault of Barrack Obama.

Sure, some of you may remember being taught in your high school history class, the social upheaval occurring in the decades between the 1950’s and the late1970’s, and the racial turbulence that arrived with it, but I can’t see how that’s even plausible, given the strength of Shetter’s non-evidence regarding the exact opposite of what has already been noted as incontrovertible to begin with.

Shetter’s blatantly wretched whitewashing [yeah, I said it] of who’s really at fault for the ongoing racial tension within this country, goes far beyond the standard vehement vileness generally attributed to chuckleheads like himself, especially when one remembers the negative reactions that far too many Conservatives had to the unforeseen possibility that a Black man might actually achieve the highest office in the land.

A wave of bigoted butt-hurt, that as you can plainly see, resulted in some truly tolerant discourse:

All that’s missing from this particularly revolting celebration of all that occurs when you lose your virginity to either your sister or a spur of the moment encounter with a just-baked apple pie, is the inference that it would probably be best if a group of upright citizens could find both a twelve-foot-tall tree, and a four-foot length of rope in order to protect the womenfolk Fortunately for Shetter’s narrative, since it’s Obama who’s the true racist, no such proposition would ever be seen on the horizon. And secure in this understanding, I really couldn’t be any happier about it.

Oh wait, what’s this?

Well. This is awkward…

“No such proposition would ever be seen on the horizon” Just feel free to toss that stupid as f**k opinion of mine out the proverbial goddamn window, when you get a chance, because the fact remains that nearly five years out from his last day in office, the conservative bigoted butthurt continues, unabated. It should come as no surprise to anyone that world leaders are the subject of death threats emanating from a wide variety of mentally decrepit twits, but the ones that were (and still are) directed at Obama were still unique nonetheless, given their racist underpinnings.

Stereotypically depicted aa an ape, a big-eared monkey, an unintelligent connoisseur of fried chicken and watermelon, Obama’s detractors not only revealed their cravenness in regards to social change, they inadvertently sank their own shakily positioned “Republicans aren’t racist” falsehood to boot. But let’s not forget, that the very same people who are totally cool with actual NAZI’s lauding Donals Trump, openly and aggressively contend that it’s definitively Obama who’s really the one fueling the forge of racism.

For the sake of clarity, if not actionable legalities, I cannot definably prove or disprove for that matter, what racial proclivities Shetter may or may not possess, but I do know this- if you come off as perceiving that BLM or Antifa are a formable threat to both your westernized culture or and social position, the odds are probably better than average, that you’re just a pair of khakis and a bargain-basement Tiki Torch away from becoming a localized problem. Just saying.

However, Shetter’s delusional fever-dreams don’t just stop at inferring that Obama is a terrorist-enabling, racist, riot-causing, anti-cop anarchist, he’s gotta ratchet that crazy dial up to twelve, because his buddy Ruth Darlene Seawolf, found hers cranked up to 11, when she once posted that Lady GaGa was, and I am not making this up, part of a Satanic cult that practices blood sacrifice.

Oh, and Tom Hanks, portrayer of Mr. Rogers, America’s resident nice guy? He, (according to a posting by RSD) is a pedophile, who was arrested in Australia a while back, backed up by photographic “proof” gleaned off the Internet. You know, the most trustworthy of sources where you can not only find a dope-ass recipe for potato candy, but Photoshopped “evidence” of Obama hanging out with Che Guevara, who died in October of 1967 when Obama was only six years old?

Nevertheless, Shetter managed to not only strip Ruth of her previously held blue ribbon for slander, he actually managed to surpass her indignantly cray-cray cat-lady vibe as well, which to be honest, I didn’t think anybody else could do, unless they underwent either a lobotomy or a serious stroke, first. And for the lightning round, he managed to hijack the memory of an unfortunate murder, just so he had an excuse to touch himself:The young woman nauseatingly named as a victim of sexual assault by Obama, is notated here by Shetter as one Carol Pintre Rose, or depending on what crazy “Q” Twitter feed you follow, possibly “Maggie Nix”;

Which, may I say, is a truly interesting notation, given that NO SUCH PERSON WAS LISTED AMONG THE VICTIMS. Weird, that. It’s almost as if she was invented out of desperation and wretchedness, huh?

Rose, who was among the tabulated victims, was murdered in cold blood along with eight other innocents, six of whom were children, when the Mormon caravan she was traveling with, found itself ambushed within the Mexican State of Sonora- an act perpetuated by a Mexican drug cartel that was, at the time, battling for territorial control against its supposed rival.

While this in and of itself is truly horrific, my personal feeling of righteous contempt is compounded even further by not only the prevalent theory that the caravan was an inadvertent victim of mistaken identity, but Shetter’s cringey crassness in seizing this tragedy, to spew yet another baseless, heartless, morally repugnant, and entirely crackpot, conspiracy theory.

Normally, I would tell such a failure of a condoms tear resistance, to go f**k themselves, but since Shetter I’m sure, is used to doing so quite consistently out of personal need, the nest best thing on the checklist of hopeful eternal outcomes to hope for, is that when he finally gets to Hell, Satan’s minions anally violate him 24/7 with a razor-studded and sandpaper wrapped, set of mechanized dildos, that don’t vibrate, so much as they spin in place.   

I’ve often made the joke about a person belling literally the living embodiment of “human pudding skin”, but now I think I’d have to go one step beyond that limited descriptive, and directly state that Shetter is far more likely to be regarded as the walking personification of a pus-filled Durian fruit, floating becalmed within an ocean of rancid mayonnaise, and topped with *Hákarl slices, imported from Iceland.  
*[Decomposed Shark Carcass]

But since I am known for playing Devil’s Advocate far more than I should, I decided to yet again, do the research that Shetter couldn’t be bothered to undertake, and strove to find the beginning thread for this sweater of inanity, using the resources of the very technological entity that Shetter obviously avoids whenever he finds himself cruising the Internet with his one truly free hand. Come for the sarcasm, stay for the onanism jokes, as I always like to say.

First, I tried entering the following uncomfortable phrase: “Maggie Nix was sexually abused by Obama”, and this was the result:

Damnit. It looks as If I’m too late- the Deep State has obviously wiped the Internet clean of the “truth”, once more. But I still had a card to play, and so I did, consequences of the mind ray be damned:

Frak.as Starbuck on Battlestar Galactica was fond of saying. Frak my life. Frak it hard. Clearly, the assembled forces of the Illuminati were at work here, so I decide to take another tack- I searched fo the photo (minus Obama) to see if I could trace the original source for its inception, and as I did, this interesting anomaly popped up:

Does it strike anyone else as odd, that a personal photo of a small child with a person who would later become the future president of the US, has no definable source? Granted at the time, Obama was simply just a senator, bit the person who felt the need to take this shot, never felt the necessity to toss it up on any social media platform layer on to brag about their seed-spawn hanging with the big dog?

And this, in an age where people showcase their morning coffee almost every day? Sure, Jan.

Not many people know this about me, but my original birth name was “Resolute”, which my parents had legally changed just before I attended Kindergarten, due to my father’s concern that mu logo was too similar to the one copyrighted by Rolls Royce, and feared that I sued for infringement. However, the qualities attached to the name stuck, so with this in mind, I plunged in even deeper, and discovered yet another twist in this theory’s twisted rabbit warren of logic:

Hold the phone… there’s now a THIRD name involved? Aee these twits suggesting that Maggie Nix and Rhonita Maria miller are the same person? I personally don’t think so, bit anything is possible whereas these cracked loons are concerned. And as a side note, is the kids last name “Nix”, or “Nixon”? This sort of sloppiness regarding the fine details you lunkheads, is why your Asinine Tales of Amazement, fall apart fatter than the will of Donald Trump’s fidelity at the AVN Awards.

Therefore, let’s recap what we’ve sort of discovered together. The first African-American to become US President, is a sexual predator in the same alleged vein as Matt Gaetz and Donald Trump, and subtly arranged for his singular victim to be silenced, but only after he got out of the protective cover of the Oval Office, and not before, because that makes…. um, perfect sense?

A weakly defined plot I can overlook. Bad acting/ I can always mock. Heck,- I own “Xanadu; the Director’s Cut” on Blu-ray and VHS for Christ’s sakes, but incompetent writing as well? That I’m afraid, is truly unforgiveable. However, when one takes into account that Shetter’s ideology currently views sexual predators the very same way that   the same perceive an underage crowd around an ice cream truck, Shetter’s desperate flail at deflective subterfuge becomes even more pathetically wretched.

Shetter can rant about coverups all that he likes, as being crazy is almost a respectfully held quality at this point in our increasing screwed-up country, but he can’t subvert the obvious; no matter who’s acting as the man behind the curtain as it were. The Truth always finds its way out. If Shetter really does think that a suiting president could be an alleged sexual predator, and get away scot-free, the he’s got far more marbles rattling free than previously ascribed.

Oops. My bad. I forgot that can happen when you’re the color of an Oompa-Loompa, buy not so much when you’re the color of the main product it makes. And no matter what political movement discovered the truth of such, they would spread it like Melania Trump at a home for aging billionaires, either for power, or political capital, and Shetter knows that.

Regardless, if indeed there truly is a Hell that awaits him, my only wish for Shetter’s eternity paying for the sins of constructing falsehoods such as these, is that when God kicks his slug ass into it, I hope he gets passed around the Demons outhouses, as if he were a carton of black-market prison cigarettes, Actually, I take that back. as the Fallen have at this pout, suffered more than enough.

Nevertheless, this odious example of what happens when you allow the human analog for a genital wart unconstrained access to the Internet, also showcases what abject f**king stupidity can be disseminated when someone who’s known for consistently overtalking without overthinking, watches too much Q-based porn on his mom’s cell phone. While I don’t truly understand Conservatives’ eternally evolving obsession with Obama past the reality of his being an African-American that they can’t best or corral, their need to paint him as a reprehensible societal monster does however, make sense.

That is, if your logic is based on the retweaked radius of a f**ked-up Fibonacci curve.

But what is the real motivation behind this campaign of delusional; demagoguery? It’s actually quite simple, really. There’s an old maxim [incorrectly attributed to NAZI Propaganda Minister Joeseph Goebbels] that says; “Accuse the other side of that which you are guilty of”, and to a very disturbing degree, it still holds a fair amount of water, due to the fact that who among us, doesn’t enjoy feeling superior to those we despise? .

And Conservatives as a rule, openly despise a lot of people. Not because those chosen for such derision are themselves “bad” people, as you’d logically surmise, but for being quite the opposite to begin with. Whereas we laud scientists and social change activists, they instead, fete murderers such as Kyle Rittenhouse, as they spin their alternate realty within their repeated cosplay of the 1935 Nuremberg rally.

Don’t believe me? Just recall the Thunberg vs. Rittenhouse meme discussed earlier, and as you do, please ponder what kind of deep-fried brain could come up with this take regarding a man of admirable decency:

For the record, this is the former not so great President Jimmy Carter, who, despite being in his 90’s still goes out into the world, and builds housing for the homeless, as trump pouts at Mar-a-Lago, demanding that people give him that which he does not deserve or has earned- the respect of others. But Shetter isn’t content with picking on an esteemed Nonagenarian, he’s also gotta go after a person who despite his military service, charitable contributions, and lack of any credible evidence, Shetter not only regards as corrupt, but whom he slurs as yet another pedophile, because of course he must:

If I ever needed an example of personal cringe, this would be on of the strong contenders for the position. Not only does it start off with the wrong presentation of tense [“He” vs “He’s”] that Shetter is known for, his laziness in not being able to competently craft an original meme from scratch is on full display as well. Jesus, Dick- if this is your idea of a “gotchja”, I can fully understand why any inventive thought that wanders randomly onto that melon you call a head, dies almost immediately from intellectual starvation.

So in review, Shatter, a man whose ideological leader, a self-admitted predator of women, and according to several sources, allegedly children as well, and who has also been directly connected through either business or personal association with no less than five prominent pedophiles, and without a shred of actual definable evidence to support his sniveling slights decided that a revolting series of online cravenness was the best way to draw heat away from his Mango man-crush, and his known foibles.

Truly, a strategy so brilliant, that even Shetter himself, didn’t understand it.

It just has to suck when you’re forced to defend your role models, and the best offensive plan that you can come up with to protect them is by saying; “Well, that’s just circumstantial evidence, so it doesn’t’; really count.” I’m fairly confident that I can use that approach to great benefit the next time my GF asks me just why the not Latina barista at my local coffeehouse, felt comfortable enough to flirt with me directly in front of her. Not gonna lie- I’ like my odds here.

In summation, the demographic of disingenuous degenerates that Shetter so earnestly carries the flag for, doesn’t necessitate their fantastical boogeyman because they fear the success of said entities, they require them, because they refuse to accept the burdening weight of their own collective failures. Hence, the reason why they’re so desperate to point their finger at someone, anyone, that they can paint as the “real” moral or social deviant.

Currently the former Trump administration has racked up quite the A-list in regards to pending criminal indictments, personal lawsuits regarding sexual inappropriateness, a history making occurrence of not one, but two, presidential impeachments, along with a host of other legal issues that until Trump was sadly elected, shared more in common with an organized crime family, then one engaged in politics.

To back this accurate assertion of mine up, I provided this 2018 graphic tabulating [at that time] the track records of criminality and the consequences resulting from such, for each prior administration.

Given the fact that this information is four years out of date, and due to the events of January Sixth, additional charges, cases, and convictions are most assuredly to follow suit.

But Obama and his associates are the ones that will soon see themselves locked up, am I correct? You know, right after the Supreme Court reinstates Trump as President, as the My Pillow guy claims will happen? Eventually, Someday, Down the road. Wherever he can manage to set those ever-changing goalposts of his. This sense of mistaken optimism, hilarious as it is, must be the reason why Shetter so confidently posts this tripe, instead of debating valid political policies that he disagrees with.

When I was a kid, I, like any other four-year-old, had a boogeyman, much like Shetter has now, but I stopped believing in all that nonsense once I realized that my Scrooge of a fatter, would never have allowed anyone or anything to live in our house, rent-free, even if it was inside my closet or under my bed.

Seriously. Growing up, I was always curious as to how our cat managed to get a corner pf the living room all to himself, without having to sign over at least three of his nine lives. But when it comes to your typical conservative smiting their deeply entrenched terrors concerning that which they choose not to understand, their coping mechanism is seemingly just to change who the monster under their beds is.

Whereas in the past, it was either minorities, Gays, Women, Liberals, or coffee cups that don’t have Jesus printed on them, the supply-chain of all that they feared and hated while limited, was still effectively efficient at keeping the sheep perpetually riled up. However, the situation is quite different now, and as it has been noted by more than a few, Time marches on, even when the Conservative’s way of thinking hasn’t.

Along with the list of previously referenced imaginary adversaries, the modern-day conservative movement has added, diversity-preaching companies, the NFL, differing viewpoints, non-Christian religions, Media in general, the “Deep State”, practitioners of Science and Medicine, and let’s not dismiss teachers, schools, and in some cases, even the students themselves, if they dare demand the convenience of not to be slaughtered wholesale while attending class.

Truly worthy foes, even if they are invented from the paranoiac ether of the cravenly candy-assed. And don’t you worry- just because the Fanta Fascist you sexually flagellate yourself to, has a well-verified track record of graft, corruption, perversion, treason, adultery, and incompetence going back decades, doesn’t mean that you can’t outright ignore it, or better yet, project such onto your self-created enemies as I noted earlier.

After all, it’s not like anyone expects credible validity from people who believe that there’s nanotech in their vaccine shot, while ignoring the fact that their cell phone is a far more effective tracking beacon that not only do they carry around willingly, happily feeding it all the data that it needs to know and/or predict, almost every intimate detail of their formerly private lives. 

Now, while the GQP’s obvious disdain for Obama presents almost as if he collectively dumped these MAGAts on the night of their Prom, he’s not their only unfounded obsession. Not by a long shot. Former Secretary of State, and current wife of former President Bill Clinton, Hillary Rodham Clinton, is on that ever-expanding list too, and as is the case with most pf their rallying jabbering points, their hard-on for hypocrisy is on full display, despite the fragility of White privilege underwriting it:

And there’s no better way to make a conservative pup his top, quite like pointing out that Hillary walks free among us, loving her best life, as their tinted messiah sits brooding in a pool of his own dime-store bronzer, hoping tor a; last-second Hail Mary pass to pull his sorry ass out of the dumpster fire that he started. Although, if that’s what he was banking on, he probably shouldn’t have sexually assaulted Mary to begin with, as she tends to hold on to things like that.

Bu Shetter, undaunted by the glaringly harsh spotlight of reality, if not inevitably, still  posted this”

I’d happily point out to Shetter here and now, that in order to throw someone in jail, you actually need to provide incontrovertible proof of their committing a crime first, which is why out guys will still be sipping Mimosas on a beach, as your mango Mussolini gets forcibly fitted for a jumpsuit that matches his skin tone, watching helplessly as Melania drains his secret bank accounts, and Ivanka makes up lame excuses as to why she can’t come visit him,

I do love though, how Shetter claims that the “the evidence is blatantly clear against Hillary and Obama”, yet for some reason, can’t produce either the said evidence of crimes, nor state crimes they’ve supposedly committed to begin with. This by the way, is a fairly consistent tactic among conservatives, that being, to brand a falsehood as truth, rant endlessly regarding it, assure that “all will be revealed” in time, and when finally pressed to back up the validity of their cravenly contrivance, claim that it’s a vast conspiracy, either too well-hidden, and/or too powerful, to successfully expose.

Hypocritically, Shetter doesn’t seem to mind when his tax dollars are being misappropriated to go after Liberal targets or the social causes that he loathes, as Trump did ever so guilelessly, but as has been established beyond reproach, Shetter’s overall intellect, makes a bag of potato tots academically akin to Stephen Hawking. Far funnier, if I were to be so frank, is the fact that Shetter truly thinks that dirt has to be “dug up” where Trump, a man who openly admits to crimes during media interviews, is concerned.

Let’s call a jackass a jackass, shall we, for “finding” dirt on Trump is as measurably difficult as finding a weed dealer at a Phish concert. Literally, all one has to do, is either cue up his greatest hits via YouTube, or just wait for his latest appearance on OAN to air. I’m starting to think that when this nightmare is finally over, it’ll be due to his writing a tell-all book reiterating his crimes, which after its completion, he then dutifully autographed just before sending those copies to the prosecutors he’d eventually face in court.

Free speech is, at its core, one of the most effectively powerful weapons citizens have to even the, metaphorical playing field, but in the ever so undersized hands of America’s angriest Creamsicle, it only serves as the reason as to why his defense attorneys drink themselves into a coma almost every day. I’m no lawyer obviously, but I can only assume what level of fear his must experience, whenever they see a crawl on TV promoting yet another of his sure to be deceitful, meltdowns.

Now, when it comes to the act and art of disintegrating in full view of the general public, nobody does it better than the modern-day conservative base, let me tell you. Whether it’s a prominent Republican politico avoiding a question about January Sixth, or an irrelevant MAGAt screaming at the sky, the GQP, it can be said, is definitely not sending their best. Mind you that’s just me extending the charitable notion that they actually had some persons of nobility at one point, but I digress,

As anyone who’s been paying attention already knows, open and truly free civil discourse, has become not only the latest archenemy pf conservatism and its leadership in general, but also excellently serves as yet another brick in the wall of their self-declared martyrdom as well, because once again, it must. You can’t cosplay as an eternal victim of cruel fate, if it turns out you’re actually the aggressor, now, can you?

Despite the bogosity of their assertions that they’re being consistently censored whereas social media is concerned, the opposite is quite true, according to Paul Barrett, deputy director of the NYU Stern Center for Business and Human Rights, whose report titled; “False Accusation: The Unfounded Claim that Social Media Companies Censor Conservatives,” determined evidentially, that rather than expurgating the right wing’s ideological POV, the top social media platforms instead, disseminated it even father.

To quote Barnett; “Republicans, or more broadly conservatives, have been spreading a form of disinformation on how they’re treated on social media. They complain they’re censored and suppressed but, not only is there no evidence to support that, what evidence exists actually cuts in the other direction.

“There is a broad campaign going on from the right to argue that they’re being silenced or cast aside, and that spirit is what is helping to feed the extremism that we are seeing in our country right now. We can’t just allow that to be a debating point. It’s not legitimate. It’s not supported by the facts.”

Unsurprisingly, the professional victims brigade that is the conservative monument doesn’t’; (of course) see it that way, because as is stereotypical with this inane ilk, proven facts are far outweighed by their biased and unfounded feelings of being personally persecuted for their dogma of dipsh***ery.

A precis best summed up by Conservative author Denise McAllister, who, along with being just flatly incorrect on the issue at hand, has also proposed that social media platforms stop moderating the content posted, saying in a USA Today interview, that: “This is a platform, right? You don’t need to act like mama Twitter or mama Facebook. Just let people say what they are going to say, whether it’s true, false, whatever. You have to just trust the people as individuals and not to try to impose power because you are going to do it inconsistently.”

Well, this is truly refreshing, is it not? The porty of “Law and Order”, unless it’s principles are being applied to them, and of “Family Values”, unless they get caught starting one with an underaged mistress, are the true defenders of Free Speech, and don’t want anyone’s ideology questioned pr challenged, and this conviction, rooted in their steadfast belief that the sharing of ideas must be freely expressed without any form of limitation placed upon them, is unshakable. Thinks of it as the hardest of moral bedrock.

Unless of course, those philosophies are elucidated by others that they’re opposed to, then all’s fair in love and war, as it were, for as it has been sadly established, hypocrites are gonna hypocrite, and God help anyone who gets in the way of that, by daring to use reality in the manner it was intended for. As it is with the majority of societal causes and concerns that conservatives align themselves with, escape clauses and loopholes, are not so much add-ons, as they are built-ins.

For them, exceptions are the rule, and its almost a certainty that if they’re pointing a finger at you, the other seven are probably engaged in trying to cover something up. While they’re quite fond of posting that “They wouldn’t need to censor us if we were wrong”, I would strongly disagree. Given the events of the last five years, I’d suggest that the argument could easily be made that false information, disseminated directly into the brains of the intellectually constrained, can be just as dangerous as a Catholic priest given free reign at a Boy Scout jamboree.

With no due respect, my flatulent firebrands, assessing one’s statements for accuracy is not now, nor has it ever has been, any form of censorship- things are either true, or they’re not. It really is that simple. So Is it all that shocking really, that these disciples of an ideology of idiocy that labeled COVID as a hoax, regards mask protocol as implemented communism, and continues pushing their false narrative concerning non-existent voter fraud as gospel, would be so stalwartly resolute in pushing back against having their asinine assertions fact-checked?

What’s even more troubling for conservatives though, is not the fact that their fictious fantasies are being taken to task, for regardless of the sheer delusion they contain, their base will swallow it without any sense of refutation. No, what truly enrages them, is their being held to account for these damnable deflections, as these two postings clearly demonstrate:Dagnabit! Where am I going to go now, if I need up to the minute information on imaginary terrorists, Jewish Space lasers, and pizzerias that serve milkshakes made from the blood of trafficked children? Oh, that’s right, I still have Lauren Boebert and about 20 other members of the cray-cray caucus to rely on. Whew. For a second there, I was kind of worried.

I love, yet again, how Shetter manages to not only mangle the English language as he displays his stunning ignorance in regards to exactly what the First Amendment, in point of fact defines, but how he assumes his erroneous characterization of such, has no boundaries to speak of.  And as a side note, if you’re going to call others stupid, you should probably use the correct word to do it.

That would be “taking”, by the way. Glad to help, as usual. But Dick isn’t done embarrassing himself just quite yet. After all, he’s got a job to do, and that apparently, is reminding us all what Twitter’s “job” is, even of he doesn’t know what that is himself. Remember that one dumbass kid in your neighborhood who jumped off his roof because he thought if he was wearing a Superman cape he could fly? Well, this is what happens when they grow up to be adults:To note, this is what the First Amendment actually says:  “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.”

Read that again if you must, for it specifically only puts one body of people in check- that being, the Federal Government, and no one else. What that means, for those of you who failed Civics class and require an explanation, is that the only singularity, either real or imagined, that can be held legally liable for curtailing your freedom of speech, is the authoritative powers that oversee this Republic.


Private companies are not subject to the parameters of the First Amendment, which is why you’re not allowed to openly comment on your immediate supervisor’s persistent predilection for being a jackass. And if you believe that they are, I can see now why you’re the one currently assembling my Big Mac to go. By way of example, I proudly hold the distinction (like Trump) of being banned from Twitter for life, due to my penchant for, and I  swear this is true, calling out TV’s “Hercules” Kevin Sorbo, Tom “garage sale Barbie” Lahren, and of course, various White supremacy groups, for their abominable stupidity…

Although come to think of it, I could have just written “craven Caucasians”, instead of their descriptive, and those v=bases would still have been covered fully. And guess what? I didn’t rant about it. I didn’t call the ACLU, or my local news station, demanding airtime regarding it.. More importantly, I didn’t ho online and embarrass myself by showing that I had no idea what the laws of my country entailed, either.

Unless you have a time machine, albeit in the form of a TARDIS, a DeLorean, or the phone booth from Bill & Ted’s Excellent adventure, along with a truly solid sales pitch to convince Thomas Jefferson that he needs to make some oddly specific editorial choices regarding technology that hasn’t been invented yet, the online oracles that you so wish would bend to your will, are going to continue in their mission to inadvertently annoy you something fierce.

Along with Shetter’s refusal; to acknowledge why these two Twittering twats were suspended from the platform in the first place, which centers on their jointly and egregiously violating the clearly defined terms set forth in the user agreements they WILLINGY AGREED TO, his curious negation of any mention of the similarly parsed terms of service for Trump’s so-called “Free Speech” site, AKA: Truth Social, which, if the past is any indicator, will be just another abortive enterprise on his already overflowing pyre of personal impotence, is most certainly a personal tell of sorts.

Specifically, the terms of service for Trump’s latest attempt to refine a controllable source of political Viagra for himself, state that its users may not “disparage, tarnish, or otherwise harm, in our opinion, us and/or the Site”, which other than being purposefully vague, if not arbitrary at best, sort of put a kibosh on that whole “open and truly free dialogue” marketing campaign that the Hair Fuhrer is spreading by using other people’s money for.

But in the end, Trump’s ignorant base of slack-jawed lard-slabs like Shetter, don’t really care about that obvious hypocrisy, as all they truly want to glean from their miasma of mental moribundity, is the most fortified of intelligence-barren echo chambers, safe from the harsh veracities of the dismal stench of accumulated personal failures, if not the world itself, which regards them less as a political movement, and more of a cautionary tale about the downside of having unnatural relations with your siblings.

And the unintentionally hilarious side-effect of this clusterf**k of a Facebook wannabe? For all their “Fk FB” talk, not one of these mindless incel inbreds will actually leave the Land of Zuckerberg, because without their made-up enemies to directly engage with, they most assuredly, have no purpose in life. Look at it this way- if everybody on Earth held hands, and darted singing “Kumbaya”, my career, if not my second-most favorite hobby would be as dead as Mike Pence attending a January Sixth cosplay.

For these people, lack of conflict would surely be a Hell on Earth, although to be fair, observing a Trump rally from the inside as someone who reads books and not hats, might qualify as a close second.

Speaking of which, if I had to assign a penalty for every fabricated fiction that Shetter circulates as if he were seeding a garden of the ignorant, not only would he find himself locked in Hell’s library, taking an eternal Civics class, I’d also make sure that along with only a non-alphabetized card catalog to aid him, a lower-level demon of annoyance would be on hand to remove the bookmark from his required reading whenever he’s not looking, so that he has to start from scratch all over again.

Nevertheless, Shetter and the rest of his cuckolded Trumpanzees cabal if given the chance, would have no such hesitation on dropping the metaphorical guillotine blade on the necks of those of who stand in their way, and we should never forget this, even if it’s only for a second. Unsurprisingly, persons who grant thugs, murderers, sexual predators, and abusers of supreme power grotesque status as cultural heroes, are, as a rule, the very last people you want running a hot dog stand, much less an all-too-powerful government.

This is not to say however, that Shetter himself couldn’t efficaciously play a crucial role in such a dystopian future, as it’s always been my credo that everyone, regardless of their ability or intelligent, has a part to play. Unfortunately, whereas Shetter may be concerned, I don’t think there will ever arise the true need for a pulled-pork sandwich that can talk, so his current calling as an amateur Uncle Fester impersonator, may be the wisest career choice that he’ll ever make.

Because as only mythical God knows, he can’t rely on his inability to pick a f**ing winner, to make bank.   

“There’s nothing wrong with being a loser, it just depends on how good you are at it.”
– Billie Joe Armstrong